I am finishing day 22 without PMO. no urges at all, the only thing I struggle with is my thoughts about how I could not perform the last time, and this girl goes really distant, I thought that perhaps I could have another chance to start rewiring but no. She seems that does not want to be involved with me at all not even in a friendly way as before. I wonder did I make her feel bad or not attractive because I did not get it up? I tried to approach her in a friendly way but she told me that she preferred to do what she was doing at that moment alone. Since then I have kept my distance from her and there is no communication at all. I knew that I had a problem with PMO and she was the one who made me realize that I do not want to continue like that, I know that I am doing it for myself. But perhaps without her, I would have continued PMOing since I could get it up with P. It seems that when doing PMO even your thoughts are numbed and now I can feel more and I feel upset. I feel with more energy, more focus, my thoughts, in general, are more clear. But as well now I tend to think more and feel more. Perhaps I am thinking too much and this girl is already with another guy or whatever. ugg so pathetic, I need to quit this thing PMO I hate it, I hate what I have done to myself, I hate how porn is looked at as something normal, how stupid people especially men idolize these fucking prostitutes aka porn stars, I hate that I found porn so young and I wish I could have stopped me. I need peace in my mind, I am not going PMO definitely, but I need to stop thinking about these stupid things as the girl's thought since I know I will never get answers. Perhaps this feeling is also a withdrawal symptom and I did not notice. Well, this is it for today, tomorrow is day 23. Wish I could recover faster but I do not want days to go that fast. Much love to all of you guys who are fighting.