Day 5
Staying porn free was still easy. The madness will start of course. It's been easy so far but wait. Being away from alcohol for half a month is starting to bother me. I've been kind of agitated and irritated.
The bosses want to organize another meeting like that one in April (April was it?). That fucked up my sobriety. I drank and I eventually ended up relapsing, I mean full blown relapse, going back to the same routine, although not right away but the seed was planted, somewhere deep inside I knew I wanted to drink again, another time. And my alcohol sobriety had been going really well, for the first time in too long to remember. This time I ain't going, fuck that. Seriously. I mean, the last thing I need right now is that thing to fuck up my sobriety again. Funny how this thing always comes when I'm finally able to get a longer streak without drinking. Of course I could go there and not drink, theoretically, but practically I can't. Being in the presence of alcohol won't make me last too long. Beside the fact that I have to quit drinking for its own reasons, it also affects my porn sobriety, I end up watching porn and relapsing.