I will make it -- Looking forward to taking my life back
- Thread starter First_step_thousand_miles
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First_step_thousand_miles
Well-Known Member
Day 167 -- No MO since Day 163 (5 days so far). Hasn't been too bad, some cravings but pretty manageable
First_step_thousand_miles
Well-Known Member
Day 169 -- Man went out drinking last night for a Halloween party, couldn't get to bed w/out MO (super horny, couldn't fall asleep for hours until I did). That was odd lol
Anyway, I'm planning to MO a bit over next 2-3 days and start fresh w/ no MO again on Nov 1.
Anyway, I'm planning to MO a bit over next 2-3 days and start fresh w/ no MO again on Nov 1.
First_step_thousand_miles
Well-Known Member
Day 171 -- MO'd yesterday. Wow. I was pretty darn hard the entire time, didn't have to imagine a 10/10 girl. Was to a girl who works in my office who is definitely attractive but no porn star body.
I also felt what many guys talk about when they recover in that I wasn't getting hard fetishizing any specific body part during this MO. I was just picturing the whole woman / experience and yet I was still so hard! Man, this MO session might be just the most positive proof point yet that this thing is working. Progress is super non-linear (just look at the last few weeks of my posting!) but it's working
Still strongly leaning towards 90 days no MO but nice to know my brain is healing up anyway
I also felt what many guys talk about when they recover in that I wasn't getting hard fetishizing any specific body part during this MO. I was just picturing the whole woman / experience and yet I was still so hard! Man, this MO session might be just the most positive proof point yet that this thing is working. Progress is super non-linear (just look at the last few weeks of my posting!) but it's working
Still strongly leaning towards 90 days no MO but nice to know my brain is healing up anyway
First_step_thousand_miles
Well-Known Member
Day 172 -- Holy cow. Yeah I said that. Had another MO session tonight, this was hands down the best MO session I've ever had w/out porn (and even with porn definitely ranking among the top 10%). I was pretty much rock hard imagining this girl from work (Laura). Again not too much emphasis on body parts specifically. MO session went on for a good 10-15min and I didn't have to struggled for an erection at all
This is absolutely amazing, I honestly have no words. My brain is healing, I'm so, so, so grateful to be on this path. I feel like this MO session finally unlocks one of those chains I've placed around myself and I can honestly start to see a happy, fulfilled future for myself. This feels WAY more meaningful than hitting Day 150 or any other arbitrary milestone. God bless Gabe Deem and all the fighters going thru this struggle...you can and will come out the other side
This is absolutely amazing, I honestly have no words. My brain is healing, I'm so, so, so grateful to be on this path. I feel like this MO session finally unlocks one of those chains I've placed around myself and I can honestly start to see a happy, fulfilled future for myself. This feels WAY more meaningful than hitting Day 150 or any other arbitrary milestone. God bless Gabe Deem and all the fighters going thru this struggle...you can and will come out the other side
First_step_thousand_miles
Well-Known Member
Day 173 -- MO'd again, incredible. This time the fantasy was to a girl who had a totally different, skinnier body type (one that I wouldn't have been attracted to before). But I was hard as a rock!! Very consistent, strong eretions in the most vanilla positions (doggy, cowgirl, missionary). I truly have no words
I know I must sound like a broken record right now but I genuinely cannot believe my good fortune. Oh I forgot to mention, I learned yesterday that I passed that test from a few months back as well!! I feel so, so blessed. The rest is all in my control (or at least mostly) -- losing weight, getting fit, moving up professionally. The path to a brighter future has never been clearer to me. Love you all my brothers @Blondie @SmokenMirrors @Ezel
I know I must sound like a broken record right now but I genuinely cannot believe my good fortune. Oh I forgot to mention, I learned yesterday that I passed that test from a few months back as well!! I feel so, so blessed. The rest is all in my control (or at least mostly) -- losing weight, getting fit, moving up professionally. The path to a brighter future has never been clearer to me. Love you all my brothers @Blondie @SmokenMirrors @Ezel
SmokenMirrors
Well-Known Member
Great stuff, king!
First_step_thousand_miles
Well-Known Member
Day 175 -- Skipped MO yesterday but just MO'd today to yet another just-cute girl. Pretty darn hard for like 90-95% of the time. Wouldn't have believed it if I didn't see it / experience it myself. I don't think even with porn (for at least the past 3-4 years) that I've ever been able to have such solid erections every time I MO'd for the past week. This is pretty crazy stuff!
Urges for porn have dropped down a TON, these days it's sometimes just mild urges for the most part. Sometimes a few heavier ones but even those are nothing like I remember having in the early days. What a journey this has been so far
Urges for porn have dropped down a TON, these days it's sometimes just mild urges for the most part. Sometimes a few heavier ones but even those are nothing like I remember having in the early days. What a journey this has been so far
First_step_thousand_miles
Well-Known Member
Thank you sir! I'm glad to see you joining me and many others in the triple digit club soon!
First_step_thousand_miles
Well-Known Member
Day 177 -- Yet another porn free day. Kind of odd but these days I'm not getting a strong urge for Porn itself so much itself as boredom is triggering some desire for it. I and many others used porn for a million different things from horniness to feeling better about our selves to boredom (and probably a bunch more other use cases).
For me sometimes these days when I'm bored, there's sometimes this urge to watch porn. But of course can't give in, not just because I'm nearly 6 months in (day 180 to come on Wed) but it would just be a sad excuse at this point as I'm not using P because the urges are too strong but because I couldn't find something else to do....
Anyway, not posting because I feel at risk on this topic but just because I think this is one of the sneaky ways porn can try and attack us. I hope this fades with time too
For me sometimes these days when I'm bored, there's sometimes this urge to watch porn. But of course can't give in, not just because I'm nearly 6 months in (day 180 to come on Wed) but it would just be a sad excuse at this point as I'm not using P because the urges are too strong but because I couldn't find something else to do....
Anyway, not posting because I feel at risk on this topic but just because I think this is one of the sneaky ways porn can try and attack us. I hope this fades with time too
SmokenMirrors
Well-Known Member
I get this too! Lets keep fighting, king
First_step_thousand_miles
Well-Known Member
Day 179 -- 1 more day to 6 months
Blondie
Respected Member
200 days!
That is a big one man @First_step_thousand_miles, I sure hope you're proud of yourself and all that you've accomplished so far on this journey.
May we all keep climbing this mountain to rid this filth from our lives!
Best to you.
That is a big one man @First_step_thousand_miles, I sure hope you're proud of yourself and all that you've accomplished so far on this journey.
May we all keep climbing this mountain to rid this filth from our lives!
Best to you.
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SmokenMirrors
Well-Known Member
6 months! Insane!
First_step_thousand_miles
Well-Known Member
Thank you my friend, I genuinely don't know if I could have done this without your unwavering support. I'm grateful beyond words can say, from the bottom of my heart, thank you. You inspire me more than you could ever know
First_step_thousand_miles
Well-Known Member
Much love my brother, we started this journey at roughly similar times and we've both made it so, so far. It's been incredible and such a privilege to walk this path with you. I'm so glad we've both made it this far and I know life has amazing things in store for both of us!