Recent content by Percival

Well-done TH! We on this forum know how hard-won it is! I used to wonder why long-sober alcoholics always described themselves as "recovering" even though they hadn't had a drink in 20 years. Now I understand: it's a long, long fight, often with many more defeats than victories, and constant...

Good yesterday. Work has been getting busier; I'm just a couple of months into a new job and it's been slower than most new jobs at ramping up. But it has been, and that's good: idleness is indeed the devil's playground. So there wasn't much time or opportunity for temptation yesterday. Wife...

I admire your patience, @GBS. People are complicated and marriages are complicated because they involve two different and complicated people. Thanks for sharing your journey with us!

Monday went fine. Tuesday wasn't perfect; researching AI (legitimately) led me to temptation. On the other hand, it was only for a few minutes and then I closed the tab and put my phone away where it was out of reach and didn't look the rest of the day.

Been a couple of days now of not searching for girls, so I'm happy with that. I feel much better about myself at this place, but of course I also know I'll eventually be thinking that it wouldn't hurt to just a look a little. But it's just like alcohol: even one is too much.

It's discouraging that doing the right thing doesn't generate as much good feeling as doing the wrong thing generates guilt feelings, but it's how humans are. It's still a strong accomplishment!

Trying to get back into the habit of posting regularly here, because otherwise I get back into the habit of looking at porn. I discovered AI sites where you can create your own images, including NSFW. The downward spiral works the same when you're "creating" your own content as when looking at...

Thanks for checking on me, @Blondie. Life has been inside out for a while after I lost my job in December. I'm re-employed now and things might be starting to settle back down. Porn-wise: well, I hardly ever look at porn, as such, any more. I do still have time when I look up suggestive...

You're doing great! Porn is indeed like drugs or alcohol: it makes you feel worse, but you keep doing it because you feel better and forget your trouble for a little while. It takes strength of character to change that, whereas all it takes to relapse is to give up.

I've concluded that I am basically yo-yo dieting when it comes to porn. I stop doing it for a while, then do a lot of looking for a couple of days or a week, and (eventually) stop again. Rinse and repeat. Right now I'm in the rebound phase, after a couple days of indulgence a week or so ago...

Good for you to recognize the temptation potential. I used to work on a college campus and there was certainly a lot of eye-temptation around. But yes, the less you give in the less tempting it will be. Still always there, though.

About the same, except that I picked up my phone at the end of the day and turned Safe Search off. I need to remember that, no matter how careful I otherwise am, willpower is low at the end of the day and I just shouldn't use my phone at all.

Well done, and yes, absolutely this. Staying disciplined does get easier over time, as the compulsions fade, but the temptation is always there and we have to always be disciplined. Or, as Prof. Moody would say, "constant vigilance!"

Not perfect yesterday but still pretty good.

Those articles always help me to refocus too, especially the ones written by or about former porn stars who talk about the reality. There may be some exceptions, but the vast majority are being terribly exploited. It helps a lot to see them as real people with real thoughts, feelings, and...