Recent content by Insight.2

  1. Insight.2

    The Power of Will (for change)

    Ok! Another try, another mindset. This time, it seems like... I'm more conscious, as in "I'm more observant of all that's going on inside and outside of me", and, also, that I now am beginning to have *power* over these things. Both internal and external. A change of perception, an upgrade to...
  2. Insight.2

    Cultivating insight

    Oh and as for the chaser effect, yup I definitely noticed it!! As a guy said on the nofap faq page for the chaser effect, But oh well. I'm hanging there. Gonna make it back up. (y)
  3. Insight.2

    Cultivating insight

    Interesting that you're mentioning Tantra, Androg, for my partner herself described a couple of times our times together as "tantric". Now, I think I kinda get what she means - the care, the fluidity, the attention - yet I still don't feel like I have good knowledge about what Tantra is. In any...
  4. Insight.2

    Cultivating insight

    I've been having the hardest time getting this journal started. It's now been 3 weeks since I first opened this page and began writing. Now I scraped everything I had written and am now beginning anew, from scratch. I hope that, along with my sexual reboot, me and my life will regain coherence...
  5. Insight.2

    Here we go again

    Day 62. How do I feel? Well, in all truth, I feel... ouch. I'm hurting. It's not easy. I did read about other rebooters' crazy ups and downs along the journey, and hell do I now understand what I read. This last week was... last week was hell. Brain fog has been back, along with the traditional...
  6. Insight.2

    Here we go again

    (Update) I simply wanted to mention that I just edited the first entry of this journal, cutting the excessive, really quite useless blabber and summing it all up with a few simple words. I want my journal to be nice to read and inspiring, not start off with panicky howling at my own fears...
  7. Insight.2

    Here we go again

    Day 56! I've been feeling so special lately... truly feels like I'm exiting a "fixed" and "restrained" dimension/mindset/reality and gradually fusing in and blending in with a new, definitely "expanding" one. A new gaze, a new me, a new world!!? I used (and I still am, but it's changing) to...
  8. Insight.2

    Here we go again

    Thanks for the encouragement, @Beautiful1973 - that was nice to read! :) Ok so here I dive back into the book, opening an empty page with much to say... what shall I choose? :unsure: today is a strong symbolic day, for it is now Day 45 of abstinence for me, or half the duration of the...
  9. Insight.2

    Here we go again

    (Edit : removed the excessive blabber) Day 41. Temptation is nigh. I'm still very much obsessed. Must continue walking down the path of abstinence - and I will! 🔥 I made it quite far already, and I will not break this streak for a brief moment of... distraction. 🤝
  10. Insight.2

    i-finally-made-it-here

    Day 45 without Porn. I'm now halfway through the 90 days of a 'standard reboot' period. Of course, even 90 days will still only the beginning of a lifelong clean way of living. But I'm expecting some benefits from all of this... and truth is, the last period has been very, very disappointing and...
  11. Insight.2

    i-finally-made-it-here

    Tension in my face, in the jaw, in the throat, has been increasing. Tension is such that it makes my voice annoyingly high pitched. It annoys me, especially since I know I'm able - in more relaxed circumstances - to hit pretty low and full notes. Feels satisfying to speak in these...
  12. Insight.2

    i-finally-made-it-here

    Strange are these dreams. I may be abstaining from looking at pornographic material in my conscious daytime while I also refrain from sexually fantasizing, yet in almost all of my dreams there is at least one very sexual scene that, of course, marks me the most. I've been remembering parts of...
  13. Insight.2

    i-finally-made-it-here

    I ended up here to go waayyy beyond what I finally learned to believe were the limitations of life, of this mind and body, with the years passing by! Oh yes, rising up, and going for the real me, a free me, and unlock that potential of the real me and of my real life! That's how I ended up...
  14. Insight.2

    i-finally-made-it-here

    5 weeks no P, 4 weeks no M/O !! Fuck yeah! Something is happening again... life within me begins to (re?)awaken and flourish... a certain drive is surfacing. Keeping up and not failing has been quite a comfortable ride as of lately; a strong force within me guides me towards where I want to go...
  15. Insight.2

    i-finally-made-it-here

    No Porn : 32 days, No M/O : 25 days Last share was about feeling alive again, for the first time in... forever. This share is now about... stillness, lack of evolution, grayness, absolute boredom - the very opposite of what I experienced for a couple of seconds (a marvelous experience) and...
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