I love myself and will recover

Wolfman

Active Member
So finally my practicals are over and I am free!

I'm back after quite a few days.
Everything went well.
And yes I was totally abstinent during this time, fully focused on my studies.

Day count: 47 :cool: :cool:

Now off to get some much needed sleep.:sleep:
Awesome stuff yogi! Take a well deserved rest, maybe reward yourself with something nice :) a relaxing trip somewhere, some event or just a mega chill couch potato day.
 

yogi

Active Member
I'm posting after an entire week
Day 53 today
And yes when the stress of exams evaporates, it's a heavenly feeling.

But also the opportune moment for old pathways to be reactivated.

And that did happen. Watched some porn, but pulled myself back quickly. No desire to M or O. So I would count that as success.

Watched some Insta hot pics past couple of days.

What amazes me is the ability to control my thoughts even when I see these apparently harmless pics.

A few months ago my hand would have gone straight in my pants on watching a few hot posts on Insta/ Twitter.
Not any more.
Neither am I feeling numb and unable to be aroused while wanting to be aroused-something typical of flatline.

What I am able to do is to actually dismiss these things with the thought " You have no power over me".

Indeed I have come a long way.
Have to be on my guard though.

To all fellows in recovery, keep striving towards freedom!
 

AJM

Active Member
Hey yogi , good to hear from that you could resist M are the trigger event.
What I am worried is I see this as a red flag sign, If I may advise you to be extra vigilant for next couple of days.
Day 53 is awesome and I have followed u through the journey ,
Very proud of you , stay strong.
 

Noah

Member
Just read your whole story. Incredible to see how far you've come. So inspiring to a guy like me, who is only 10 days free of PMO. Keep up the good work.
 

yogi

Active Member
So guys I am back after a long holiday.
Sad to say, I relapsed yesterday and today. That's 2 straight days of PMO.
I last posted on Aug 15, said it was day 53.
So count it from there: my streak ends on day 69

Was it really P? No. Guess what...... I relapsed to Instagram pics!!!

An interesting perspective though: after 69 days of no PMO, the fact that I was aroused by sexy pics on Insta, is sure evidence of a recovering brain (agreed that it's partial recovery, but it still is better than before!)

But I do not feel self-pity, self-loathing any more. I have to reset my counter. But guess what, if I can make it 69 days, I can go still longer.

And here is an important reason why I should not despair and feel dejected: I draw inspiration from this streak of 69 days, longest ever in my life. And all the scientific knowledge I have gathered tells me one thing: the longer and longer my abstinence periods, the weaker and weaker my addiction pathways become.

So off to a fresh start.
I will keep posting regularly, at least once or twice a week.
 
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