Porn is not an option

Blondie

Respected Member
Day 266

Day O of no O


Well, one thing led to another last night and I went beyond the point of no return. :cool: I don't feel bad about this, because I didn't have a goal or anything, it was just a general sense of not getting off too much that I was aiming at. However, I think I'm going to continue with this method for a while still because I've had some good progress over the last month in my recovery that I didn't get while just staying away from porn.


Thanks @Phineas 808 and @man_in_30s_rebootingnow for your comments.
 

downhillfromhere

Well-Known Member
Hey Blondie, incredible you got to a month! Agree, nobody should feel bad for having an orgasm, there are benefits to having them as well. But for sure, finding some sort of balance in the frequency that works for you seems like it would be very beneficial.
 

First_step_thousand_miles

Well-Known Member
Hey buddy @First_step_thousand_miles
I have personally felt this a lot and I do contemplate over this at times .

I am a competent professional in my field of work . But I don’t feel competent in how I sound while talking how I look while walking and how I sit in meetings .

The blows I have had been punched in my personality because of the P and chat addiction has certainly made me feel like an underdog about myself , even though I am not one actually , atleast in my professional life .

and it is awful that I carry that UnderDog attitude in my walk , my talk and my body language and the tone of my voice .
Everything underneath is actually good but you know what happens to a Boxer who knows how to defeat his enemy in the ring but just because he walks in thinking he is an underdog ,he then actually looses to an Underdog fighter
Tragic ….

that’s what has been going on in my life and I feel in many of your lives too to some extent.

I feel as our clean streak grows so does the confidence in our voice , our walk , our talk and our attitude when faced with adversity be it work/life/sport/hobby/social life/any where else

I Hope to grow more and more confident so long as I grow my sobriety streak !
Hell yeah man!!
 

First_step_thousand_miles

Well-Known Member
Day 266

Day O of no O


Well, one thing led to another last night and I went beyond the point of no return. :cool: I don't feel bad about this, because I didn't have a goal or anything, it was just a general sense of not getting off too much that I was aiming at. However, I think I'm going to continue with this method for a while still because I've had some good progress over the last month in my recovery that I didn't get while just staying away from porn.


Thanks @Phineas 808 and @man_in_30s_rebootingnow for your comments.
You're crushing it Blondie!!
 
D

Deleted member 22651

Guest
Day O of no O
You have amazing self control my man, also glad to see you enjoying yourself.

From my recent experiences, I found that releasing after a while is better than holding it for so long. After O'ing a few days ago, I found myself more focused and relaxed. Its a better experience without porn, as long as its not overdone.

Its all about balance, but you already know that.

Keep leading by example! Youre doing great!!
 

Blondie

Respected Member
"Working most of the Program is like healing only part of the infection. The struggle and pain will just keep coming back. Old habits continue to gnaw at you. Old thought patterns continue to remind us of “the good old days.” Old reactions continue to make our life painful and unmanageable. If we do not work the entire Program, we allow these old parts of our addiction to live and possibly grow. When we embrace the entirety of the Program, especially when it is uncomfortable, these old parts of our addiction drain away and the Program gets easy."

Stein, Timothy. Gifts of Recovery: Daily Meditations for Men and Women in Recovery from Sex & Porn Addiction (p. 183). Kindle Edition.
 

Blondie

Respected Member
Day 269

Thanks @WestCoast. I'm definitely no god of recovery, I'm a just guy who's made enough mistakes to figure out how not to repeat them again and again (mostly!). The greatest trick to getting over porn, is to not make porn a "God" in your mind, that is, a god that can't be defeated. It really doesn't have nearly as much power as we give it credit for. For example, if someone watched porn 5 times a day then goes a whole week clean, he suddenly realizes that porn doesn't have as much power over him as he thought it did. Then he does a couple of 90 day streaks and realizes this fact even more. Lastly, he does this enough, that after a few years, there's no reason to ever look at it again.

Fuck porn and the divine status we've given it!

Tomorrow I'm nine months clean. I've been here once, thus I can do it again.
 
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Escapeandnevercomeback

Respected Member
"Working most of the Program is like healing only part of the infection. The struggle and pain will just keep coming back. Old habits continue to gnaw at you. Old thought patterns continue to remind us of “the good old days.” Old reactions continue to make our life painful and unmanageable. If we do not work the entire Program, we allow these old parts of our addiction to live and possibly grow. When we embrace the entirety of the Program, especially when it is uncomfortable, these old parts of our addiction drain away and the Program gets easy."

Stein, Timothy. Gifts of Recovery: Daily Meditations for Men and Women in Recovery from Sex & Porn Addiction (p. 183). Kindle Edition.
Absolutely essential comment. It goes hand in hand with what Russell Brand says: You don't choose between working a program and not working a program because you are either working The Program or you are working the program of your life, of what school taught you, what parents taught you, what bullies taught you, what society taught you etc. If you are fucked, you need reprogramming.
 

Escapeandnevercomeback

Respected Member
“The fact is that good habits are hard to form but easy to live with. Bad habits, on the other hand, are easy to form but hard to live with." - Brian Tracy
Comfort zones create fear of unknown. Bad habits, addictions, comfort zones suck but they are familiar. With time you start choosing them instead of escaping them because escaping is the unknown. Porn is the ultimate soul killer. Porn makes you afraid. Noah Church has a story on his channel, a guy who literally chose between escalating some volcano or dying if he dropped all the way down. He did it and said that without his streak, he would've been to freaked out to even try. This is what porn does. Escaping means a lot of things but I believe in doing a few short term tactics and strategies to get it under control first. Then you can move on. Courage is needed here. Courage is doing what you have to do even if you are shitting in your pants.
 

Jon11208

Member
Wow. I just found all this yesterday and have just started my journey but just wanted to say reading through this journal has been so inspirational and motivating. This is the first time I've attempted this with this much hope and feeling like I can really do it this time. Congrats on all the success and looking forward to following along!
 

Blondie

Respected Member
Day 270

9 months porn-free


Today is a good day. Thank you all for your encouragement over the last six months - it means a lot.

Thanks @Escapeandnevercomeback.
Courage is doing what you have to do even if you are shitting in your pants.
I like this man. This totally gets to the heart of the matter. We really can do this and face our fears because we are bigger than they are.

Fuck porn!

Thanks @Jon11208!

Welcome to the forum. I look forward to reading about your journey.
 

First_step_thousand_miles

Well-Known Member
Day 270

9 months porn-free


Today is a good day. Thank you all for your encouragement over the last six months - it means a lot.

Thanks @Escapeandnevercomeback.

I like this man. This totally gets to the heart of the matter. We really can do this and face our fears because we are bigger than they are.

Fuck porn!

Thanks @Jon11208!

Welcome to the forum. I look forward to reading about your journey.
BIIIIG milestone man, congrats!!! Only 1 more quarter to go before you're at a full year
 
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