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8 days. Most of the causes of my inadequate sleep over the last couple of weeks are gone, and 1.5 weeks left of my part time roommate. Looking forward to finally being able to get 100% back to my habit stack.

7 days. Not much sleep last night so keeping it brief but no porn.

6 days. One piece of good news despite having not been “clean” consistently since my longest run ended last year: I used to constantly get derailed by waking up and using in a sort of half awake state. I would be doing great and then that would happen. But ever since that run that hasn’t really...

5 days. Getting porn out of my system by not putting it in.

The reality is there is no “getting it out of the system”. I think everyone has had the “one last session and then I am done”, but all using does is put it back in our system. There is nothing to get out. It feeds itself. One use begets another. But it just means we get back up and try again...

4 days. No insights and the moment but I do hate porn.

3 days. Congratulations to me for beating my last streak haha. Ok but for real I do think that was a bit of a blip and I do feel motivated and optimistic. I don’t need this nonsense in my life and I know I am capable of going without it because I have done it before. I just need to set myself...

2 days. Caught up on sleep a little but will probably take a couple more good nights to get back to normal. Started reading Dopamine Nation. Nothing too earth shattering so far but definitely can do with the reminders.

1 day. I am super tired. I have a friend whose mom went into a coma on valentines days a few years ago and has a really hard time every year, like potentially suicidal so I kind of had to stay up with them and make sure they were good. I didn’t get to sleep until after 2 am. That should be the...

Well. That did not last long. But I am not letting the shame stop me this time. It started with insta, which reminded me I haven’t really gone about putting in guardrails like I have when I have been successful in the past. Deleted instagram so I can only look on my computer (which is the same...

2 days.

1 day. Well I have been gone a minute. I kept meaning to come back last year but kept being embarrassed that I was not getting far...shame is definitely one of my biggest roadblocks and one I need to work on this year. Then January and the first couple weeks of February I was out of town...

4 days. Was up late to appease a friend last night, so no energy and minimal thoughts this morning...but also no porn.

3 days. I need to break my caffeine addiction. Going to start actually measuring gradually decreasing my daily intake. It's an indirect contributor to my porn use, but truthfully in my experience it helps in the moment I have some but makes me feel more tired until I get it and after it wears...

2 days. Here's to a porn free November.

1 day. It is all tricks, there is no question about that. I think the issue is, especially when I get excessively tired but also when I drink, my brain basically turns off. At least, the System 2 thinking part (for anyone familiar with the book Thinking Fast and Slow) does, so I just do whatever...

Ok so the triggers since I lost the big streak are basically getting excessively tired due to lack of sleep combined with heavy exercise, and alcohol. There are things I can do to avoid each but also things I can do to mitigate them. Will talk more about that tomorrow because I am short on...

5 days.

4 days. When I am struggling to stay away from PMO, I am usually thinking of it in terms of reasons i shouldn't use, but there's always counterpoints I can make to justify using. When things are going great, I am usually thinking of it in terms of reasons I should use, and there just aren't any...

3 days. I guess the problem really is just that I forgot how pointless PMO is again. And that an urge is just that, an urge. It's not the body saying it needs food or it will literally starve. It's an urge. To do something pointless.