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  1. fedupwithporn

    Thats just how I feel

    3/6/20 Hello, Coming back to the community after a long time absent, trying to take on this addiction on my own. I feel sceptical sometimes that an online community can really do anything to help me since its so abstract and everyone on here is just a message on a board as far as I can see...
  2. fedupwithporn

    New Year New Journal

    1/25/20 I hate porn so much. I can feel its effects like heroine pulsing through my veins whenever I masturbate to orgasm. It feels so good, so soothing and all around powerful in the moment but even in that moment I can now identify and relate to the feelings of apathy, increased anxiety and...
  3. fedupwithporn

    Fed up, Tired, Angry and Sad

    I'm getting a bit scared, I think for a while I convinced myself that I had this porn ting under control. But I'ts not the case, its a disease, I need help. I need to make serious interentions. Its so hard and scary because I'm afriad to tell anyone around me, Im scared and ashamed. How to make...
  4. fedupwithporn

    Recovery Journal

    Dear Journal, The last couple of days, I've been relapsing and it doesn't feel good. Tonight I got really scared that my sexual tastes are getting more sensational and relying on shock factor to get aroused causing me to seek out degradation porn that doesn't align with my values as a person...
  5. fedupwithporn

    Stop Wishing, Start Doing

    8/24/18 ++++ Intro to be posted later Dear Recovery Journal, My old journal timed out. I went back to my old thread and I learned that it had been more than 120 days since I had last posted to it. I feel shame about this but also a part of me is proud to be back after a rough patch of heavy...
  6. fedupwithporn

    "Greatness in not an act but a habit"

    Dear Journal, Day 2 This is my first post on the forum and my first time seeking help for my addiction outside of working with my therapist. I started watching porn at age 11. It started out with me using my mom's computer to look at pictures of women's breasts, a concept that was new and...