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    Day 0/new member

    Hi @GrateClips . Keep going. I identify with a lot of what you said. Men and women are wired differently, we all know that. They love sex too. Some more than others. If you‘re trying the hard core reboot I.e. no masturbating at all. See how you feel after 30 days. My guess is you will find it...
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    quit for good

    Keep going Joe. Can I ask you a question? You always said you were open with your wife about your porn use and she understood - but did/does she know that there was chat room stuff going on? I am not trying to flush you out, just that your situation certainly doesn’t mirror mine (I hid it all)...
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    Finally sick and tired of being sick and tired

    We’re right beside you, man. You help me by doing this. Focus on that for a second. Not only are you making yourself a better man, you’re making others better men too. It’s an act of kindness by you.
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    Another story - probably the same as everyone else

    88 days no porn. It’s a start. However I MO’d yesterday. It’s not counting as failure although some will say for the full hard core reboot you don’t MO once. I was nearly bursting and my libido was up. All nice feelings but your bursting feeling dominates everything you do and I thought a quick...
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    Crawling from the wreckage

    We’ll done. Latch onto the great feeling. It’s a reward. You don’t get rewards like that if you pack up smoking, or drinking or gam bling, you just get withdrawal. It’s great when you KNOW that you yourself have mended part of your brain. Keep writing. You help me.
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    Another story - probably the same as everyone else

    Just a journal note (if I read this back) that I had a massive return of my libido today like a switch going on. But this was not accompanied by large erection, although there was some definite stirring. So maybe I am not so flatlining now. The downside was that I had a good conversation with...
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    Another story - probably the same as everyone else

    I said I would stop with the counting but I am nearing a milestone. 86 says no PMO. 46 DAYS NO MO. It’s just numbers. In 86 days I have masturbated three times I think and my 46 days hard core reboot is the longest abstinence since I was about 13 years old. So I like the numbers from a...
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    Honoring the Ultimatum

    Hi @The Tunesmith - read all your posts. I am your age, my wife is older than yours but otherwise I relate to all you say. It’s tricky writing on here if every word is read by her, but actually that’s fine. This is the truth, so she is better off knowing. You are improving yourself and this...
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    Finally sick and tired of being sick and tired

    Hey @FreedomFromTheStruggle_11 if you notice any changes in yourself, rejoice in them. All those changes are making you a better person. That sounds like cringey but it’s just the truth. Depending (obviously) on how bad your addiction is, you have scars to heal….BUT heal they will. That’s just a...
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    Did I relapse?

    Just repeating what @Blondie said. I think you’re ok, but edging is discouraged not only because you could be teasing yourself and we’re playing with fire here….don’t deny it. Also, and this is just what I read the hard core (no masturbation at all) reboot if you want absolutely all the benefits...
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    Reboot Journal: A path to freedom

    Being alone is possibly number 1 trigger. Try looking at the journal when you’re first alone. That has worked for me. Keep writing your journal and if you need to write loads of times a day. Anything that distracts you is good. Call a mate up, do some cooking, read a book. Avoid a screen if you...
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    Another story - probably the same as everyone else

    We’ll now @GrateClips - that is very kind of you to write, and some truly perceptive things. All very worth reading. Also to @Gracie above I am so thrilled to have a female follower. I mean that in thee most sincere way of course. I will be very careful and I like the new me so I am carrying...
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    Another story - probably the same as everyone else

    Thanks @Gracie. The male perspective on the partner devastation is probably something that varies a lot. There will be some who think their wives should just move on….come on get a grip, every man on earth watches porn, it’s normal behaviour these days. But I know that my wife is really really...
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    quit for good

    That’s really on point when you said “Addiction recovery is a team effort. Not a time for revenge or humiliation“. I think that’s a really tricky thing for the humiliated partner /wife but it’s what I am focussed on. Talking to my wife even when she says how hurt she still is, is actually a move...
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    My Recovery Journal

    We’ll done. Little tip that worked for me. I used to wake up and look at porn but instead I now look at this forum first thing and then I plan a project to do during the day. Simple stuff like that keeps you on track and keeps the distractions nice and active. Keep going. You are helping me a...
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    Another story - probably the same as everyone else

    Thanks @Blondie - although you slightly make my point when you fell off ( I presume just one instance) after 500 days clear. Too depressing for me. By the way 500 days is awesome- but all I would say is if you go the rest of your life without porn but you fall off half a dozen times, you will...
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    Accountability

    @j165 - hero. Well done. I am about 83 days clear of porn and 43 days no MO, so I am very close to you in time. I have dealt with the no PMO thing well by taking the quasi-religious view that it is the devil. From the evening service of Compline: be sober, be vigilant, for the devil like a...
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    Reboot Journal: A path to freedom

    Keep remembering you’re not alone. You’re not broken, you’re not abnormal……..because if you are then I am and many others too. We’re the Guinea pigs in this problem. Let’s be an example. Let me know when you get to 7 days. You’re doing brilliant.
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    Another story - probably the same as everyone else

    Thanks @TryingHarder it was a big moment, and the cliche is right….it’s never as bad as you imagine. The pressure on me to steer the right course is obviously now greater, but that’s a good thing. I am thinking of dropping my day counting. Can’t see that 9- days is somehow the answer. Forever...
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    Another story - probably the same as everyone else

    82 days no PMO and 42 days no MO. My wife and I told the kids yesterday. That was hard but ultimately very rewarding. I thought they would handle it and they were superb. I almost feel elated at having got through that. And I also feel guilty that I got 90% of their sympathy and my poor wife...
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