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  1. W

    A journal

    Fantasized last night. Like full on and consciously. So that is a lapse, but luckily it was not worse. However, I do feel the energy drain/ mood down a bit today. Really what got me is a rationalization ( a lie from the addiction) and complacency. The lie was : Oh in the past I have...
  2. W

    I think its high time i genuinely ask for help!

    Hey man, yeah this stuff is really tough. The big keys are persistence and adapting. What you have been doing isn't working, so you need to try other things. The good thing is there are TONS of things that help with fighting this addiction, many you have never heard of, this is a good thing...
  3. W

    A journal

    Today was a good day. I really enjoyed working on a project that is important to me - so I'd like to keep that up. I have no been doing as much as I want in terms of meeting women - so I'd like to put more into that. BUT , the good part of it is that in the past dating was a huge motivator...
  4. W

    A journal

    Hey, just a quick - more so than an update - just a bit of writing which can be nice. Had some urges the last few days. Last night fantasy was popping into my head. A good response to this is, rather then letting it build. To have a plan to keep it from happening tonight - the plan is a...
  5. W

    A journal

    Quick little check in - going strong in terms of abstaining still. Been having some issues at school from time to time. I mean, I have no class for a few weeks - so why worry about it I guess?
  6. W

    (1995) Financial Freedom + Tiny House w/ Self-sufficiency BEFORE 30y.o.

    Sorry about the lapse - get back on the horse! The system of putting your quotes of the consequences for motivation is great. Progress not perfection
  7. W

    A journal

    Quick check in - pretty stressed out and angry about something at school. Good news is I just got in a good workout.
  8. W

    A journal

    Hey - been a minute. Wow looking at the date of my last post it's been a lot longer than I thought. Things are going pretty well at the moment. The only issue has been tiredness. I think I was over working out - not schedule too well and maybe went a tiny bit over board on the diet. Anyway - I...
  9. W

    A journal

    Other then that - I have been highly busy. Especially yesterday, looking forward to taking it a bit easier today. Just a few hours of work and will build in a nap and extra rest.
  10. W

    A journal

    Well unfortunately - I allowed myself to lapse a few days ago. I ended up masturbating several times ( and fantasizing about porn). I felt tired and quite off the next day. Since then things have been good and I believe I pinpointed the problem. I took a supplement to relax at night. Oddly...
  11. W

    A journal

    Wow - that was a tough couple of days. I am a bit annoyed that porn flashes happened in my mind , but I didn't ever let it get too far. I believe it has mostly passed. Today work was a bit tough and I was anxious, but basically I just decided to commit and sort of dove in and worked hard and...
  12. W

    A journal

    Short on time - but just a little celebration - that was the strongest urge I have had in sometime. Went for a walk - and then did an intense bike ride, went hard for 20 min - almost sprinting the whole time. Then feel asleep - that is huge, beating urges like that, rewiring the brain for sure
  13. W

    A journal

    Haha yup! Reminds me to maybe hit a nice workout tomorrow. Thanks for the response! Just got hit with a real strong urge - and came here to post quick ( felt REAL at risk) having a response from you reminds me to push through it - nice to be in that successful group also : ) Going to suck it...
  14. W

    A journal

    Wow - actually cool to see my journal on the second page - the forum is a LOT more active then it was in the past. Things going well - yesterday I had some antsyness and my body felt achy and tired - very intense exercise made it go away immediately. Funny I thought I was soo tired but...
  15. W

    A journal

    So, I started up a meditation program yesterday - I already see some difference a bit more focus. Today has been pretty good, Saturday I am making my "off" day - so I take off from my morning routine other then making the bed - this also allows me to sleep in a bit and still make it to a...
  16. W

    20 Days Clean!

    That is great man! Just keep doing what you are doing. When you get a success - focus even more on doing what works and remaining vigilant. Whatever got you here - do it even more. Well done - keep it up!
  17. W

    A journal

    Really good day - I have set a simplified schedule for myself - key is just to be disciplined. I like it basically just work non stop from morning till afternoon and be done with it - feel good and accomplished. Ate a nice healthy meal - thinking to likely read a bit and nap. Read until I...
  18. W

    A journal

    Hey, so still strong with abstaining - first half of yesterday was good. I did the trip which was fun - I was a bit tired and it was pretty tiring but it was a good experience and I am glad I did it. It was useful for me to recognize that when doing activities getting out there not EVERY time is...
  19. W

    A journal

    Thanks man! Yes very good reminder about the caffeine. I really appreciate the affirmation and I find it encouraging and it makes me want to keep putting in the work - and honestly salvage today and the rest of the week - I am still strong about abstaining! But had some other things go on and...
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