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  1. cookiemonster

    Road to freedom

    Not an easy business. Relapsed today. Seems as soon as things start to get better I mess them up. I remember how much better things felt porn free. And it doesn't take much time at all to start feeling the benefits. Here it goes again. I do not watch porn. That's not who I am anymore. I have...
  2. cookiemonster

    Road to freedom

    There was a relapse somewhere between now and my last post but things are getting better. Had morning wood the last two mornings and am building up a streak.
  3. cookiemonster

    Road to freedom

    I relapsed at 3 weeks. Back on the horse. 1 day no PMO, no MO. Starting to build up motivation, momentum and become prepared to make this the most important thing in my life again. A half assed 3 weeks is better than nothing but it's time to refocus on kicking this addiction for good and...
  4. cookiemonster

    Road to freedom

    Posting here in the interest of writing in my journal my regularly to keep myself accountable. One day at a time.
  5. cookiemonster

    Road to freedom

    Hey, not too bad, not too great. I've been going through waves of 2 week streaks followed by relapse and binging. I'm currently 2 weeks no PMO, no MO. The past few months have been some of the most exciting and happy months of my life, so I'm happy about that. But I'm not happy that it's hard...
  6. cookiemonster

    Road to freedom

    Doing well so far. Looking forward to building up a longer streak again
  7. cookiemonster

    Road to freedom

    I made it two weeks no PMO then relapsed yesterday. Very hard to focus on the reboot while travelling but at the same time I don't think the reboot needs focus, it's good to get busy with life and let time away from porn take care of itself. It's no good to keep using porn but I am at least...
  8. cookiemonster

    Road to freedom

    Thanks for the support guys. Coming up on one week PMO free tomorrow (I think). I'm busy travelling and having a good time. Haven't thought about porn at all. While I relapsed, I didn't lose the progress and didn't lose the habit, just a moderate setback that I don't want to let happen but...
  9. cookiemonster

    Road to freedom

    Hey guys, I went completely off the rails. Getting back under control now and will post intermittently as I get more wins under my belt. Thanks for checking in, it helps. Fuck porn. I don't want it in my life ever and we're going to keep making that a reality.
  10. cookiemonster

    Road to freedom

    Thanks for the support gang. I hate to be here saying this but I used porn twice today. Streak is over. I'm going to follow in fellow rebooter @Ezel 's footsteps and get straight back on the horse. Just as we fight to be porn free each day I think after a relapse we can fight to not binge...
  11. cookiemonster

    Road to freedom

    Oh my oh my. I saw a triggering picture on social media and have come very close to relapse just now. I didn't search for anything, I didn't take any actions, but all of my mental barriers collapsed and I was one moment, one random action away from losing the streak. Instead of doing...
  12. cookiemonster

    Road to freedom

    Going to set myself the goal of no MO today again. A day at a time.
  13. cookiemonster

    Road to freedom

    No MO today. Onwards!
  14. cookiemonster

    Road to freedom

    Thanks Blondie. I'm writing here in the morning as a bit of a change of strategy. I'm setting myself the goal of no MO today. Should be achieveable.
  15. cookiemonster

    Road to freedom

    I MO'd again today and fantasy is starting to creep back into my mind. Going to take it one day at a day time. Taking a moment now to remind myself that I don't watch porn anymore. That's not who I am anymore. I don't do that anymore. I can, I will, I am the cookiemonster. At least that's my...
  16. cookiemonster

    Road to freedom

    10 weeks no pmo. I MO'd again this morning. Somewhat of a really weird position where MO for me seems to be detached from porn because I'm still not feeling close to relapse (but I know I'm closer than I realise!) Having said that the more I MO, the more I can feel cracks form in the...
  17. cookiemonster

    Road to freedom

    I've been here before. Tomorrow will mark 10 weeks porn free. Funnily enough here I am at the 10 week mark in my last reboot talking about a trigger on the TV. Today there was a similar nude trigger in a show. I am also going through a rough patch in terms of more compulsive MO. I MO'd again...
  18. cookiemonster

    Hello Gentlemen. Now we begin.

    Giving this thread a bump
  19. cookiemonster

    Road to freedom

    I had a dream about relapsing last night.
  20. cookiemonster

    Road to freedom

    I have MO'd 3 times in the past two days but still not even close to looking at porn. So I guess technically I should reset my streak but that's more of an emblematic move than anything that will make a difference to recovery. I'm still healing and I find once I've MO'd like I have and then...
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