Search results

  1. G

    Day 0/new member

    yes for the most part. but there have been times, more so the last few weeks where the old addiction wants to elbow in and get me to break down. having read other journals and heard other stories of people doing the same thing its often when we feel confident that "we got this" that thats when...
  2. G

    Betrayed by porn......the demise of intimacy, a partners tale!

    i would say many women mirror the consistent, committed mindset whereas many men have trouble with that same mindset. unfortunately.
  3. G

    Betrayed by porn......the demise of intimacy, a partners tale!

    in reading your writings I can see two pains. One is the pain of dealing with a partner who is struggling with his own set of addictions - sexual and chemical. The second is a personal pain of want of a relationship and love but that want is not being fulfilled with the person you chose to want...
  4. G

    Day 0/new member

    i think you misread a bit. sex is not back on the table as of right now i think i'm just coping better with being more patient about living life until it comes around. but i do think its slowly getting there. we'll get there i hope. i haven't asked my wife about sex in over a month; i don't...
  5. G

    Day 0/new member

    Month 6 6 months sober. I stopped using days. I am using months now to highlight my journey, not days I decided. Yes, I'm ok. I have as of late noticed I continue to get more and more busy in life. This is both a good and a bad thing. Good because well I go through my day and know that I was...
  6. G

    Another story - probably the same as everyone else

    i hope you have a productive session without knowing your wife i think its important to separate two important issues that are both related but not the exact same. one is the addiction/porn usage - clearly you have been doing better here. But can she believe/trust you? i know there's an element...
  7. G

    Crawling from the wreckage

    there's a really sad story of a porn star who went from really beautiful and fairly big to living underground in the tunnels of Las Vegas where there is a thriving subterranean homeless community.
  8. G

    Another story - probably the same as everyone else

    this reminds me of a passage on a book about sex addiction, where the author, who is a Christian pastor but also a recovering sex addict, said that the more he watched porn, the more he wanted his wife to engage in "exciting" sex. But it never fulfilled his needs, only actually seemed to fuel...
  9. G

    Day 0/new member

    I'm glad you felt a stirring. my entry yesterday was very short but also necessary from me, for me, but i'm really glad it provided a service to you. My counselor says that for me, growing up lonely in my household with my dysfunctionally emotional parents, I learned how to self soothe, keep my...
  10. G

    Day 0/new member

    Day 160 (give or take) A tough day. I think my wife finally started doing some deep diving into her own recovery and it hit her pretty hard. It feels like a step back day today but we will continue on our recovery. she was honest in saying that she wasn't ready for sex last week, and she's...
  11. G

    Crawling from the wreckage

    good to hear the low urges. they are generally good i think, to help sobriety but also i think, disconcerting at times because it makes one wonder if things work or not. creates a temptation. i know a woman that i would categorize as a siren. the more i knew about her the more i realized she...
  12. G

    Another story - probably the same as everyone else

    on the bright side - you haven't watched porn coming in on a year. you are markedly more self aware now than you were before all this. you have better self control, much better for that matter. i don't know the ins and outs of your relationship but you should probably do an inventory of where...
  13. G

    First Post - Feeling Scared!

    also another word of caution. once you hopefully do get pregnant and a child. throws a wrench in everything, the wife is often tired and very consumed with taking care of a child as she should be. for me this was a time where i acted out and used porn a lot more. sex when it came around often...
  14. G

    What's the longest flatline you've experienced?

    i hear you on the good days and bad days. i'm about 5 months in no PMO. on the one hand i am proud of what i am doing, on the other hand there are times where i sometimes want to just test to see if everything works even if its with PMO - I don't because that would undo everything i've worked...
  15. G

    Beginning the journey

    that must have been difficult to share. I can tell you I think there is hope for me even if you don't feel hope for yourself. I often feel the same way myself but others tell me that there is hope for me. I think its natural as a human being to experience self doubt . how often were you...
  16. G

    First Post - Feeling Scared!

    definietely feel this is a lot of stress as a cause. you are putting a ton of pressure on yourself to have a baby. when women do this they very often have trouble conceiving. heck my wife was one of those women. basically once she gave up on the idea of having children in her mid/late 30's she...
  17. G

    First PIED sign 15 year ago, depression making this hard.

    thaks for sharing. i think sharing is often a good first step of mental healing. i think a lot of ED is brain derived. Confidence is huge in this type of thing. have you ever had counseling about your anxieties with women and whatnot? or at least really opened up about this with another human?
  18. G

    What's the longest flatline you've experienced?

    well i got to agree other than maybe a couple vitamins i think the best thing to put in the body is just food. one literally has no idea what is going into pills especially the unregulated supplements world. i am in flatline too. I post mostly on the over 40's board. But I am sober now going on...
  19. G

    Thirty years of self-medicating with PMO and MO - it stops now

    yeah i think its the addictive nature in us that makes us easily addict to other things. for me it can be video games. i wasted so many hours of my life in my 20's on gaming. but in my readings many sex addicts easily have concurrent addictions or past addictions. alcohol for sure is just...
  20. G

    Another story - probably the same as everyone else

    yes in situations of couples trying to reconcile both have their own recovery track. Your wife has hers, my wife has hers. Addicts by nature look for the quick fix. So when we think we are a little better we want everything back to normal - happy wife, great sex, everything is back to normal...
Top