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  1. Chris1986

    I need to do this. (Relapse. Starting again)

    Been pretty mad time lately but my son was born a few weeks ago. I'm a dad!!
  2. Chris1986

    Rebooting trough self-parenting

    Maybe frame it as a lapse rather than a relapse. You identified a lot and I think a relapse is more when you are stuck in it for a longer period of time? Just my 2 cents. Hope you are still doing well.
  3. Chris1986

    I need to do this. (Relapse. Starting again)

    Both my gran and uncle have passed. My uncle first about a month ago and my gran a few weeks ago. Her funeral was Tuesday. It was a hard day but upon reflection I feel lighter and more grounded currently. Things have felt pretty chaotic and dark thoughts were looming. I am glad to have had...
  4. Chris1986

    I need to do this. (Relapse. Starting again)

    So Thursday evening my partner was in major pain shooting from her groin running down her leg. I have never seen her in so much pain. I wanted to.call an ambulance but she got me to call 111. They sent an ambulance. I thought we were losing the baby. I was so scared. Thankfully baby is ok but...
  5. Chris1986

    I need to do this. (Relapse. Starting again)

    1 tooth grows out of line so it doesn't grind down. Had 9 rats in total and never had this issue before.
  6. Chris1986

    I need to do this. (Relapse. Starting again)

    Been a bit of a stressful week so far. Work has been a bit of stress and taking one of the rats yesterday ended up taking up a lot more time out of my day than I hoped. Thankfully they are still ok though just need regular teeth trimming! My uncle who was Ill is now back in hospital. I havent...
  7. Chris1986

    I need to do this. (Relapse. Starting again)

    Thank you for your advise.
  8. Chris1986

    Escape and never come back

    Rooting for you man. We all are.
  9. Chris1986

    I need to do this. (Relapse. Starting again)

    She gets very excited about it but it's brand new news each time I tell her. She has started believing this delusion that her sister has all this power and turned us against her and its her sisters fault she is in the care home. Really sad.
  10. Chris1986

    I need to do this. (Relapse. Starting again)

    My gran has been moved from hospital into a care home. She cant look after herself anymore and her confusion is now dementia. Had a really tough visit with her today. Lots of tears from us both. Had an acting out urge but opted to come on here. I cannot recall where I saw it but the phrase "I...
  11. Chris1986

    I need to do this. (Relapse. Starting again)

    And on streak notes I am on 191 days
  12. Chris1986

    I need to do this. (Relapse. Starting again)

    Still been quite stressful. Gran still in hospital and thought uncle was gonna pass a few times. In positive news its still early days but all going well I am going to be a dad. I am full of love and hope. The news has filled me with joy. I remember wanting g this life but never believing it...
  13. Chris1986

    Sexting.

    I can relate. I had a pretty busy social life and was in the music scene playing in bands and arranging gigs. I was living with my partner/fiancée but I still found myself compulsively sexting. Its a hard cycle to break. Granted it was formed in my brain from the age of 12/13 but I found being...
  14. Chris1986

    I admit - I am addicted

    Most of us have been there my friend. Dust yourself off and get back on that horse. Rooting for you.
  15. Chris1986

    I need to do this. (Relapse. Starting again)

    Rough day yesterday. Visit with my gran was tough and we had one of our rats put down. I am doing ok though. In the last few months I worked through some of my sexual shame with self touch as my counsellor had advised. I ignored this advise and never M'd in my first long period of recovery...
  16. Chris1986

    I need to do this. (Relapse. Starting again)

    Thank you. Hope you are ok. I have been away for a while. Things have been going ok though the work situation still isn't perfect but I have been working again. Me and my counsellor agreed that I was no longer in need of our session at this time. They said their door was always open to me...
  17. Chris1986

    Crossing the river

    Hi I been away from the forum for a while myself but due to being in a period of stress Feel I need the forum back in my life again. Glad the job is going well. Being happier in work is a big help. We can all change just got to remember to practice self compassion and keep picking ourselves...
  18. Chris1986

    I need to do this. (Relapse. Starting again)

    81 days 21 hours I am doing better in my health now. Still not 100% but been working again with a matelast week and some of this week. I found my self having moments of being very drained and hurting after work which were "prime" acting out time when I got home. I have stayed strong though...
  19. Chris1986

    Escape and never come back

    I had to come out with all my issues with my family and it's a hard thing to do but I felt like it was right thing for me to do. SUre they may not fully understand it all and early on said things trying to be helpful that had the opposite effect but with time they kind of got with the program...
  20. Chris1986

    Escape and never come back

    We are still cheering for you man. Dust yourself off and pick yourself back up,
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