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I realized an important aspect of this website and its relation to relapses, that might make you wanna quit writing here. Firstly, a caveat, this is my personal experience and opinion, which may or may not hold true for you. As long as I come here to write about my relapses I get a bit of...

The name says Diary of Thoughts(24), but I'm 25 now. I have been unactive here for past 5-6months. During all this time I struggled with relapsing, couldn't go past more than 10-14 day streaks. At one point it got worse, as I was self destructing knowing very well what I am going to do and how...

Relapsed yesterday, started watching porn on my laptop. Was all alone, and had these images going in my head. Started by searching something similar to what I was thinking, couldn't find and I soon went to stuff that was degrading for the opposite sex. My last relapse before yesterday was 6 days...

Had relapse, compulsive and abusive behavior. I'm not in control, I'm an addict. Edit: I read somewhere and understood this, that once an addict will always remain an addict. Because that craving will remain with us, might reduce in its effect but it remains. The neural pathways that formed...

Relapsed last night, didn't stop for quite long. Went there 3-4 times Was abusive with myself. Golden non-negotiable rules to be followed during my reboot journey Meditate and Excercise everyday Sleep on time Don't touch yourself Don't search or scroll through pornographic material Factors...

Reached Day 7 today

Day 0

Day 4 : Aiming for Day 7

Day0, I have been relapsing for the past weeks. I was very ashamed of myself to even come here and write about it. I want to share this today, check this out - https://www.bryanbraun.com/your-life/weeks.html So much of it I have used up, and I don't feel that I have "really" lived in even half...

Day 3: Yesterday went really well, I went out with friends from college. It was fun. Today I have to do some studies and exercise.

Day 1: I didn't see my last relapse as going back to square one. Because there were many things different this time, first there was no P, second I stopped in middle of M multiple times, third after O the first thought was how did that happen I wasn't even aroused? and the last, I didn't go for...

Day 0: I relapsed, I think 5th day is the point where I have to get my defenses strong. I MO without P. There was resistance, I stopped multiple times but most of it was compulsive like I have been doing it for so long that I actually have to make effort to stop whereas the act happens without...

My first mobile phone was Samsung B2100 Marine. I absolutely loved it. It was built to last, literally. It was waterproof (or maybe spill-proof), it was shock proof, it had amazing battery life. It was also the phone on which I first watched porn. Barely 2 inches of viewing screen. I remember it...

Day 4 : Feeling a lot lethargic today, have a long list of things to be done today. I like the idea of sharing images. So here's something from my favorite comic

Day 3 : I haven't seen much dreams for a long time, most probably I do have them while sleeping but I don't remember them. I have just woken up from an evening nap, and I had a dream. One that I remember, one that I wish I didn't, like all the others. In this one people were dying not just any...

Day 2 : nothing much to share, had some thoughts as I was alone at home today, ignored them. Feeling sleepy. Difficulty in following through work & classes. P.S. Maybe happiness is not something to be found, but created.

Day 1, was a busy Sunday today. Just realized that I haven't been meditating for past couple of days, will do it today. Couldn't exercise also, just did some pushups right now. Still have a lot of things to do, I am taking a lot of initiatives in my college (masters) so have some...

I have this feeling that porn has taken away my memories, it has made my mind dull to the point where I can't remember a lot of things. This might sound as rubbish to some but I have instances where I started getting few memories back when I was away from PMO for a stretch of time. Also after...

Day 0 Disappointed with myself. I joined this place on April 20, today is Sep 4. That's 5 months, or 157 days and I couldn't even stay away from PMO for a stretch of whole one month during this period. Again aiming for next 7 days will keep increasing it.

Day 0 (8 more to go) Relapsed, don't want to talk about it. Will reduce the time I spend here & total on screen. Made the mistake of staying awake for long. Reminding basics: sleep on time + meditation + exercise