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    Killing my Dirtiest Secret

    Hey gang! Thanks everyone for checking in on me over the past few weeks. I had a bit of a rough go of it after the Holidays - tons of intermittent binges and indulging in nicotine again. I’m not proud of myself, considering how good I felt on my 16 Day streak around Thanksgiving. I’m directing...
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    Killing my Dirtiest Secret

    Another day of bingeing for your boy. Not acceptable to be honest. It’s wild how deep the hooks of PMO have on me but I know there’s light at the end of the tunnel. I’m going to beat this someday. I know I will. I have absolute faith that we can all beat this - it just takes dedication and...
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    Killing my Dirtiest Secret

    Well lads, I made it to Day 8 and relapsed. I went back home for the holidays and just fell off. I got triggered by Instagram reels and just went crazy. I’ve binged the past two days without any regard for recovery. Really disappointed because it’s made me slip into old habits like nicotine and...
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    Journey to a better me

    Congrats on stopping yourself brother. 49 days is a monumental streak. Stay strong tonight and tomorrow dude. Message me if you’re struggling at all.
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    Journal for my reboot

    EDIT: OOF, I didn’t read the most recent posts - this was in response to Dec. 4th post. Lol sorry. Hey Wanderer, glad to see you back on here brother. I sadly am still really trying to figure out the best ways of coping with things since I’ve removed porn as my support system lol. The only...
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    How I started masturbating and watching porn.

    Hey brother, so glad you’ve found this forum and that you’ve become aware of what porn can do to someone. That’s the big first step. It’ll be a journey from here on out but you’ve made the only decision you can today so congratulations! The next big step is arming yourself with all the...
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    Journal of an Addict Who's Trying to be a Focused Artist

    Congrats on the streak and happy birthday king!! I hope it was a blast. Stay aware this week because after crossing a milestone, the brain will sometimes try and glorify porn as a “reward” for that event! Keep killing it brother!
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    Killing my Dirtiest Secret

    Day 5.5 - woke up feeling like garbage. Hated it. Felt depressed, angry, all the above. I went on Instagram and started typing in keywords. Saw one image and then the thought of relapsing just made me even more angry and upset. I stopped myself and now I’m here. Not counting this as a relapse...
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    Killing my Dirtiest Secret

    Day 5 - smooth sailing! I had a bad fight with my girl so I’ll keep all of you posted on that in the coming days but PMO hasn’t been a thought for me. I had a crazy, kinky sex dream and woke up hard but didn’t do anything about it! I hope everyone out there is staying on top of it.
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    Journal

    Keep going dude! If needed, message me before you relapse. Outline what you’re going through and it’ll convince you to stop.
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    Been addicted to straight and gay porn for almost 10 years.

    Keep going dude! Remember there’s no such thing as just one peek. Don’t let that edge in.
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    Killing my Dirtiest Secret

    Day 4 - not too shabby! Definitely had cravings for nicotine but am feeling solid on PMO. Listened to Fight the New Drug’s podcast “Consider Before Consuming” and in one of their episodes they talked about how the line between sex trafficking and porn is actually not really a line at all in most...
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    Killing my Dirtiest Secret

    Day 3 was easy money yesterday! I had sex with my gf twice to great success but honestly am ready for a bit of a break from the sex over the holidays. It feels bad to say because I know how lucky I am to rewire with her, but I just want to stay abstinent for a bit to make the sex feel less...
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    Killing my Dirtiest Secret

    Thanks so much for taking the time to write out a post to me man! It means a lot! Really appreciate the kind words and helpful reminders. It’s always a process to put myself back in the headspace of someone recovering and it always helps having kind and helpful people in my corner!
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    Taking back my dignity

    I totally understand where you’re coming from dude. Bouncing back from a relapse is always so hard to do and practically impossible to do perfectly. So happy to hear you’re still with the program though, bettering and arming yourself with more resources. That’s all you can hope for in the short...
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    Taking back my dignity

    Hey dude, how are you doing now? I know you were in a really tough stretch recently and have put yourself through the wringer trying to get better, but we haven’t heard from you since Saturday. Would love an update when you get some free time this week. Stay strong brother! We’ll all beat this...
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    doing the thing

    Keep going dude! So proud you’re achieving what you set out to do.
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    Been addicted to straight and gay porn for almost 10 years.

    Hey brother! Canguro linked some great resources above, totally worth checking out. I’m also linking the EasyPeasy book which was a huge help to me when getting back into abstaining from PMO. https://easypeasymethod.org/easypeasy.pdf
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    Journey to a better me

    Reading through your journal, I’m so impressed by your journey my dude. You’re killing the game. I’m glad you know this is a particularly high-stress and dangerous time for you without anybody in the house with you. Keep moving with that knowledge of past pitfalls in mind. Excited to see you hit...
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    Journal

    Keep going brother! We’re all rooting for you.
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