October 19th 2022
Relapsed last night. PMO. Doing my best to keep accountable. Searched for pornographic PDFs as my phone filter limits much of the streaming websites.
Contributing factors: turned down from my wife for sexual intimacy, it was late at night after working all day (rejected, not...
Sunday, October 9th, 2022
Relapsed. Full PMO. Again it's the websites that allow explicit images my filters are not catching. I know how to get around the filter.
Contributing factors: Stress, shame, disappointment, fighting with my spouse.
Monday, October 3rd 2022
Struggled today and relapsed. Full PMO. Been doing better up until today. Searched for and found websites that allow images. Couldn't sleep this morning. Woke up at 4 am and couldn't go back to bed. Succumbed to temptation.
Contributing factors: tired, elevated stress...
Tuesday, September 13th 2022
Struggled today and relapsed. Sought out porn. Wife working. Daughter at school. Despite many filters on my phone, viewed on my cell phone. Trying not to live in shame. PMO to image.
Tomorrow is a new day. Want to keep fighting. Want to heal and be free of this.
Monday, August 29th 2022
Porn free today. Day 4
Grateful to get to spend quality time with my wife and daughter tonight. Evening walk after she got off work.
Sunday, August 28th 2022
Checking in. End of day 3 since relapse. Good day overall. Determined not to succumb to temptation again. Noticing since my relapse, urges rising to give in to other vices that haven't given me problems for a while (vaping and smoking). Haven't given in. Just observing...
Orbiter & Blondie, thank you for your support.
Working on getting myself back into a pro-recovery mindset. I've done well since last reporting relapse.
Want to be accountable. Relapsed yesterday full PMO. 8/25. Didn't want to report as I was/am feeling shame. Secrets keep me sick. Fuck secrets.
Idle time. Boredom. Stress. Hunger. All players in the relapse.
Friday, August 12 2022
I relapsed tonight. Full PMO. Viewed on my game console. Feeling pretty shitty. Got caught up in the "obsession." Triggered as I was shopping on Amazon. A scantily dressed female triggered me while browsing the website. Got caught up in the surge of dopamine in the...
Hello,
It's been a while since I've been on here. Feeling conflicted and shameful. Good indicator that the addict that lies within is alive and well.
Just want to check in and report relapse.
Despite being unsuccessful in being able to find porn all the behaviors that go along with...
Hello!
It has been a while since I have been on the forum. I'm grateful to still be porn free. I think I'm over 200 days. By far the longest time I have ever been in my life since I was 13 years old.
Since my last post there have been times I have faced temptation. I even searched something...
Sunday, June 19th 2022
Day 179 no porn
Happy Father's Day!
Just wanted to check in as it has been a while since I have been on the forum. Six days. Today I was scrolling my Facebook feed and found a friend recommend. I have been using it lately for professional networking. It was a female and...
Monday, June 13th 2022
Day 173 no porn
Day 0 no MO
I have been struggling a lot with MO over the past five days. At least once daily. However, I have not struggled with wanting to use porn (thankfully). There have been times where there has been low temptation. Probably the craving was 3 to 4...
Tuesday, June 8th 2022
Day 168 no porn
Day 0 no MO
Again this morning with the MO. Morning glory=MO. Need to change morning routine as the former mentioned is the pattern. Wake up somewhat lucid with a erection and leads to MO. Don't feel it's detrimental to my porn recovery as it once was...
Monday, June 6th 2022
Day 167 no porn
Day 0 no MO
Slipped this morning with MO.
Lately, I have been more irritable than usual. Taking some steps to better my mental health. The number one culprit I'm going to work on is not watching the news. I have been too obsessed with "fear porn" a.k.a...