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    Just Checking In - Progress for me - not perfection

    @Gracie My husband appears to have norovirus - and I guarandamntee not one of those little girls could stomach (much less attempt to) clean what I have cleaned up over the last 18 hours. And YES - DISRESPECTFUL! Not just to us as individuals but to the marriage. Sigh, and this is exactly why...
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    When your wife finds out...

    Love and support are great IF they are really trying to fix it. Some aren't.
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    Just Checking In - Progress for me - not perfection

    YUP! @ImBroken Now you're hitting me in the heart. Mine says he's done with it. The only therapy has been our few couples counseling. He still sees it completely differently than I do. I am so tired of being sad and fearful that he will go back to it, I am also trying not to make hasty...
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    Vomiting thoughts-Journey to Healing?

    That's because men get distinguished as they age😉😁 And by all accounts you were drop dead gorgeous to start! Thank you for the virtual hug! A decent night sleep has left me feeling happier.
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    A Poll For the Older Guys here

    Wow! Lots of interesting convo going on here. I think it was @Jlied who said Mrs. Lied continued "putting out" perhaps as a means of preventing a relapse. For me, 3 nights after finding out, as hurt as I was, I needed him. He is my person, my best friend, and I needed to be loved to help the...
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    A Poll For the Older Guys here

    Are you able to estimate how many times per day?
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    Vomiting thoughts-Journey to Healing?

    Having a bad day. Birthday is coming soon, and it's hitting me hard (never had an issue with birthdays before). Started making the coffee and tears started streaming just thinking about "celebrating" my BD. Pretty sure I'm going to have a pity party with a good cry today. It's like turning a...
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    A Poll For the Older Guys here

    I think that is a big question, was it always this way, Is this a normal state?
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    Vomiting thoughts-Journey to Healing?

    First couples therapy today. 1 hour (actually 50 minutes) just isn't long enough. Feels like all we did was rip open stitches. Husband minimized a lot. I clarified some of the minimizations. Next therapy in a week, then miss a week due to travel.
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    Honoring the Ultimatum

    Wow! That was...hard to watch, and amazing at the same time. Impactful.
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    Vomiting thoughts-Journey to Healing?

    I just posted this on another thread and thought it should be in my journal. The thread was about wondering if our past happy times were actually happy or a fake. This was my response: Been there done that. Changed my wallpaper on my phone from him to a flower in my back yard, took down...
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    Seeing Spouse Differently…

    Been there done that. Changed my wallpaper on my phone from him to a flower in my back yard, took down every picture in the house of us having a seemingly happy moment together. Each picture felt like a lie. It made me want to break things so I took them down. It's been 8 months, and when...
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    The Shame

    It is a mind fuck. I am trying (TRYING) to stay focused on changes I see in my husband. I think I posted about this in my vomiting thoughts thread - a few days ago I went up to his office to ask a question - normally I stand quietly and wait until he's done with whatever he's working on so as...
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    Another story - probably the same as everyone else

    @Jlied - interesting...my therapy was about this yesterday, and I just posted about it. I guess that's the part we SO's need to accept - sometimes there isn't an answer - I guess the next question is why is it so hard for us to accept that? I guess I've found my thought for the day. This one...
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    Another story - probably the same as everyone else

    Good Morning Mr. Geebs! Not at all! You're working hard and making great progress. I loved your post that compared February GBS to November GBS. Can you help me understand this? I brought this up to my husband a couple weeks ago - I had a realization one day that I was treating him as...
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    Just told my partner, and I’m very scared of our future.

    Hello Falcon, I've been married for 33 years and FOUND OUT about it. I will say that from my perspective, being told would be better than finding out. At least you have shared your truth. The reality is that each SO (significant other) is going to handle it differently. I would suggest...
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    The Shame

    A question popped in my head when I read this, and I will be pondering it myself today - If this were any other type of addiction, how would you handle it? (I am not implying anything - I am wondering if it can or can not be handled the same as if it were some other addiction and why.) I...
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    The Shame

    This is a difficult area for me. My ego (outside the marriage) is well intact. Besides being intelligent, kind, helpful and generous, I can walk in a room and all heads turn. I won't lie, it boosted my ego. But I have a different perspective now. It's hard to imagine a place were I will...
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    Vomiting thoughts-Journey to Healing?

    The Importance of WHY - My Perspective (part of my therapy yesterday) First, I want to say to the hard working rebooters, this is not a personal attack on any of you. It is simply my thoughts on the "why" in my particular circumstance. The "why" is a huge important piece of information...
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    A Poll For the Older Guys here

    I'm sure, just as it is for men, different for everyone. For me, 56 and post menopause, in general not much. That said, with all the P rehab stuff going on it's on my mind quite a bit but not in a positive way most of the time. Take the P stuff out of the equation and I would guess a few...
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