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  1. Simon2

    Holding the Fool (me) to Account

    I've just figured out why I have carpal tunnel in my left thumb and wrist... I won't spell it out - but repetitive motions over the course of 30 years will do it. It's been bothering me ever since my boy wants to go mountain biking all the time. I'm very proud of my physical well-being and...
  2. Simon2

    Holding the Fool (me) to Account

    The sirens are calling. Tie me to a mast or I will jump in and drown. Day 41.
  3. Simon2

    I will make it -- Looking forward to taking my life back

    Wow. Almost 500 days. That's amazing!!
  4. Simon2

    Holding the Fool (me) to Account

    Rereading this post today. I need to. Because I'm starting to forget and just visited the wrong site for a few minutes. Day 38
  5. Simon2

    Holding the Fool (me) to Account

    This is the stage when I start to forget how terrible I feel after giving in. What I do remember very well though is the euphoria before that. So my mind is weaker to the little voice telling me I should just give in. I don't need to beat this. I can have a bit of it. Anyway. Just reread the...
  6. Simon2

    Holding the Fool (me) to Account

    A situation at work yesterday got me super turned on. I didn't pull back from it as I could have when it was going on but sort of just let it continue. Today I'm having a hard time concentrating. Having the memories float back. I MO'd to them this morning too. Wasn't too great. The problem with...
  7. Simon2

    Holding the Fool (me) to Account

    I had a good weekend. Now that I'm in the office again in front of the computer I'm feeling withdrawal symptoms in the space where I had some big failures before. No worries. I won't go there. But my mind is telling me it would be a nice way to spend time and avoid facing my work, the stresses...
  8. Simon2

    Another story - probably the same as everyone else

    There's like 40 guys here waiting with baited breath for that post telling us you've scored. The roar will be deafening! You deserve it man.
  9. Simon2

    One day is a time.

    Keep pushing through it!
  10. Simon2

    Holding the Fool (me) to Account

    Today I'm feeling triggered. Nothing happened in particular, so I think it's just the old channels in my brain feeling dry and wanting to be "watered" with porn. Can't give in. Even though the voice is telling me right now "how nice" it would be. Day 25
  11. Simon2

    Holding the Fool (me) to Account

    I have tried that, and I should get back to it. Thank you for the reminder. It definitely helps.
  12. Simon2

    Holding the Fool (me) to Account

    Today I feel super sexually charged. Not sure why, other than that I'm almost a month away from my last relapse... I've also taken some looks at girls and women that didn't accomplish anything other than getting me amped up. I always tell myself that I don't need to stop enjoying the beauty of...
  13. Simon2

    Another story - probably the same as everyone else

    Congratulations!! You are a different man today and I feel in your posts that you are not really in danger of every relapsing to who you were. Not to say you should let your guard down, but you have fundamentally become a different person than you were. That's huge.
  14. Simon2

    Escape and never come back

    How ya doing?
  15. Simon2

    Holding the Fool (me) to Account

    The week has just blown by. It's Friday. I'm clean. I'm not giving porn a chance by not entertaining any ideas of giving in. I am thankful for my precious clean streak, because the withdrawal is much much less severe than last year. I can do this. We can all do this. Stay strong everyone! Day 19.
  16. Simon2

    Holding the Fool (me) to Account

    Day 15. Feeling pretty decent.
  17. Simon2

    Holding the Fool (me) to Account

    13 days. Monk mode. That part wasn't planned but has worked out that way and I'm sort of curious just how far I can take it...
  18. Simon2

    Time to End This Once and For All

    Stay strong!
  19. Simon2

    Holding the Fool (me) to Account

    I AM grateful that it's not as bad as last year. I am benefiting from 10 months of being clean earlier this year. It isn't easy staying clean exactly, and there's body pains - BUT it's way better than the torture I endured last year. I can still think... Day 12
  20. Simon2

    Holding the Fool (me) to Account

    The blue balls are setting in. I'm aroused from the friction of my pants while walking. That's what 10 days of zero stimulation has gotten me. I'll have to suffer through this before I'll start to feel normal again. Fuck porn. Day 10
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