Hey guys,
first I am glad to find this forum and it really motivates when I read the stories, problems, experiences and succeses.
So I am 22 and student.
My first contact with porn was about 14 and I just watched it sometimes over years. So it was kind of a "normal consumption" with no ED. But with about 18 I watched it nearly every day and so a addiction had to be developed. At this time I always thought that porn isn't the best thing, but it doesn't damage. And it felt really good (Of course of Dopamin) So I just continued ... Till half year ago I wondered about my porn topics became more and more hardcore and I was sure I don't like this. So there the doubts about porns started. But I was always the opinion I just have to find a girlfriend and then I will stop it and everything will be fine. So I also got this ED, but don't really thought about it. So I decided to reduce porn or stop it, but ohh wonder it isn't so easy. But I could reduce it, about 6 porns the last 3 months, but normal masturbation constantly. But this ED was still there. So I searched the web and finally found yourbrainonporn.com. This was 6 days ago, so I am on the sixth day of abstination.
First I was really shocked and so angry and disappointed of myself. I decided never watch any porn again. I just felt sick thinking of it the first 2 days and now still a little. I always thought such things can't happen to me. But whining doesn't help, so I was more or less happy to know what's going on. I've read really much stories and topics about it and now I understand so much things in the past. For example how porns influence your behaviour towards women. I had dates the last years, but I never was really interested in these women. Just thought it isn't the right one. So porn was my replacement. Another issue is that now I have a girlfriend for a few days. We know each other a long time and in the last weeks we were getting closer and closer. So I tried to tell her about my porn ED. I begun with:" I really want to be with you, but we can't have sex the first time". For she it's ok and she doesn't have to know why. So I didn't tell her about my porn ED. On the one hand I want to be honest to hear, but on the other I really have fear of her reaction and that she maybe will leave me. So my first question: Have anybody a advices or comparabel experiences about it ? I just don't want to loose her, because of this.
The other thing is I don't feel really good. I mean I have pain in my left tenticle, stomach, no real appetite and just feel kind of weak. Of course I know withdrawals aren't easy and I've read that these problems can appear. But I am just insecured right now if this is really normal ?
Hope my english is understandable and that's all for the first.
first I am glad to find this forum and it really motivates when I read the stories, problems, experiences and succeses.
So I am 22 and student.
My first contact with porn was about 14 and I just watched it sometimes over years. So it was kind of a "normal consumption" with no ED. But with about 18 I watched it nearly every day and so a addiction had to be developed. At this time I always thought that porn isn't the best thing, but it doesn't damage. And it felt really good (Of course of Dopamin) So I just continued ... Till half year ago I wondered about my porn topics became more and more hardcore and I was sure I don't like this. So there the doubts about porns started. But I was always the opinion I just have to find a girlfriend and then I will stop it and everything will be fine. So I also got this ED, but don't really thought about it. So I decided to reduce porn or stop it, but ohh wonder it isn't so easy. But I could reduce it, about 6 porns the last 3 months, but normal masturbation constantly. But this ED was still there. So I searched the web and finally found yourbrainonporn.com. This was 6 days ago, so I am on the sixth day of abstination.
First I was really shocked and so angry and disappointed of myself. I decided never watch any porn again. I just felt sick thinking of it the first 2 days and now still a little. I always thought such things can't happen to me. But whining doesn't help, so I was more or less happy to know what's going on. I've read really much stories and topics about it and now I understand so much things in the past. For example how porns influence your behaviour towards women. I had dates the last years, but I never was really interested in these women. Just thought it isn't the right one. So porn was my replacement. Another issue is that now I have a girlfriend for a few days. We know each other a long time and in the last weeks we were getting closer and closer. So I tried to tell her about my porn ED. I begun with:" I really want to be with you, but we can't have sex the first time". For she it's ok and she doesn't have to know why. So I didn't tell her about my porn ED. On the one hand I want to be honest to hear, but on the other I really have fear of her reaction and that she maybe will leave me. So my first question: Have anybody a advices or comparabel experiences about it ? I just don't want to loose her, because of this.
The other thing is I don't feel really good. I mean I have pain in my left tenticle, stomach, no real appetite and just feel kind of weak. Of course I know withdrawals aren't easy and I've read that these problems can appear. But I am just insecured right now if this is really normal ?
Hope my english is understandable and that's all for the first.