Reboot Day 191
I feel like I have my life back--no, it's more like, I feel like I have a life!
A few weeks ago, I was so angry at my son and my wife over an incident, that I decided to shut them out forever. The next morning, I made a phone call, wrote a 4th step, and focused on my part. During the writing, it became clear that I was using anger to cover up the shame I was feeling at having made mistake. I accept my mistake, acknowledge that I'm not perfect, and join the human race. Then I was able to move to compassion, gratefulness and love for my family. This restores my serenity, and brings joy.
On Monday of this week, I was turned down for a promotion, and they gave it to a very young person who does not have the education degrees that I have. I started to feel anger, jealousy, regret, and shame.
I did a mental 4th step, and moved to acceptance. I see that I really have not been doing my best here at work, while the one who did get the job is a very hard worker, and really deserved the job. I, too, would have hired her. I now see this as an opportunity to change my game at work. I can't tell you how happy I truly feel about this, and was able to welcome her as my boss with a sincerely positive attitude.
NONE of this was possible in the days when p**n was still an option for me.
T H A N K Y O U A L L for showing me how to do this!