Day 32, and the fantasies are coming more often

[True2Myself]

Hi All,  Well day 32 for my PMO, and until now I've had a surprisingly easy time not watching any P.
Not to say that it hasn't popped into my mind, but I've been able to get my mind on other things until the urges pass.
Lately though, what I call "mini-fantasies" will pop into my head, and are getting more frequent and harder to fight off.  Are these just normal withdrawal symptoms, just delayed in my case?

I guess I should add, that I think one of the reasons these fantasies are so hard to erase is that they are based on actual real-life experiences, not Internet.  Most of the time they are about real bi-sexual encounters that my wife had when she was in her 30's, long before I was in the picture. 

  Before the big Porn Addiction bomb was dropped, she used to share stories with me (in great detail) about encounters between her and her girlfriend.  Lesbian sex has always been my biggest weakness, and unlike the Internet kind, real encounters have become more hard-wired into my brain, because they actually happened and not just some Porn actresses acting out a scene.  She knew of my desire for this kind of thing, and could get me hard in about 2 seconds by talking about her encounters. 
  However, that the "bomb" was dropped, any since then, any mention or thoughts of it is forbidden, and I'm expected to just erase it from my memory banks.  Yeah, right... 

I don't have the fantasies to the point where I get hard and FAP, but sometimes they come so fast and are too close for comfort, and this scares the heck out of me that I will relapse.

So why am I posting this other than to just vent it out?  I guess just looking for support and tips and techniques to stop fantasies dead in their tracks as they are close to getting out of hand.
Sorry for the rambling, but I need to get this off my chest in an effort to better understand it. 
Thanks for listening, and comments, ideas are always welcomed! 

 

[Hetrix Mex]

You are almost there man. The fantasies are a sign that u are almost there and you just have to climb the biggest stone before you get to the top of the mountain. The last big battle before reaching the peak!

 

[True2Myself]

You are almost there man. The fantasies are a sign that u are almost there and you just have to climb the biggest stone before you get to the top of the mountain. The last big battle before reaching the peak!

Hey I like that!  Nice words of wisdome...
I think I'm going to write that down and tape it to my steering wheel so I have a constant reminder.
Thanks Bro!  ;D

 

[SebUK]

I always start getting fantasies around 30 days. They get worse and worse until when I sleep my minds are just filled with past images I've looked at. The only time I managed to go longer than 30 days was when I was going to the gym. I think I was so tired from working out that I couldn't be bothered fantasising and also I had already got a chemical rush (not sure if it was dopamine) from going to the gym.

So yeah, I'm in the same boat as you mate. I'm currently on day 14 of my second reboot attempt (my first was 45 days). When the fantasies kick in again I plan to try: 1) meditation, 2) doing research on porn addiction and 3) posting here. And I'm also trying to get outdoor hobbies so I don't sit on the computer when I'm bored. I think if your porn addiction is heavily embedded in your life style choice, then you need to change your life style.

 

[fightthefight]

I'd be interested to see what guys who have fully rebooted have to say about fantasies and their frequency. Up until now, it has been fine. but I am noticing more and more that these thoughts are popping into my head multiple times a day. I've got to a similar stage before and then relapsed, because the fantasies have reminded me of stuff I have watched, and combined with curiosity, tiredness and boredom, I've gone to take a look in a moment of weakness.

Is this a phase that passes as the reboot goes on? If so, how long does it last?

 

[Pisces21]

Another question I'd like to know the answer to- how many of you noticed that the fantasies/urges pop up during certain times of the day? For me the absolute STRONGEST urges are while im in bed nice and comfy (for obvious reasons)- at night and in the AM. Every morning is such a struggle to contain myself and I find it mostly fades as soon as I make the choice to get out of bed and stand on my own two feet. Im 51 days into my reboot and the past couple nights/morning have been hell. I have so much anxiety that I get insomnia... any thoughts?

 

[SebUK]

Another question I'd like to know the answer to- how many of you noticed that the fantasies/urges pop up during certain times of the day? For me the absolute STRONGEST urges are while im in bed nice and comfy (for obvious reasons)- at night and in the AM. Every morning is such a struggle to contain myself and I find it mostly fades as soon as I make the choice to get out of bed and stand on my own two feet. Im 51 days into my reboot and the past couple nights/morning have been hell. I have so much anxiety that I get insomnia... any thoughts?

My fantasies are mainly at night. But if I see a trigger during the day that can set my mind off too. It's really annoying because I might be feeling pretty good and then suddenly I see a girl in a short skirt or something and my mind starts going all mushy. Horrible. The other annoying thing is that I'm angry I have to feel bad about seeing that kind of thing. When I was younger these things weren't triggers linked to the addiction, just a guy appreciating a female. Now all of it is warped.

 

[True2Myself]

Another question I'd like to know the answer to- how many of you noticed that the fantasies/urges pop up during certain times of the day? For me the absolute STRONGEST urges are while im in bed nice and comfy (for obvious reasons)- at night and in the AM. Every morning is such a struggle to contain myself and I find it mostly fades as soon as I make the choice to get out of bed and stand on my own two feet. Im 51 days into my reboot and the past couple nights/morning have been hell. I have so much anxiety that I get insomnia... any thoughts?

My fantasies are mainly at night. But if I see a trigger during the day that can set my mind off too. It's really annoying because I might be feeling pretty good and then suddenly I see a girl in a short skirt or something and my mind starts going all mushy. Horrible. The other annoying thing is that I'm angry I have to feel bad about seeing that kind of thing. When I was younger these things weren't triggers linked to the addiction, just a guy appreciating a female. Now all of it is warped.

My fantasies were mainly at night too, especially on the nights when my wife wasn't coming to bed at the same time I was. (we are often on different schedules.) 
What I found helpful was something that Gabe had mentioned in one of his video's and that is to try to think of something else GOOD that is in your memory, thereby pushing that BAD thought (fantasy) out of your mind. 
Play that memory out in your mind in detail, second-by-second as if it was really happening.  You'll be surprised at how consciously thinking about a good and REAL event will push that fantasy aside. 
No it doesn't always work 100%, but it will get better and easier the more you do it.  Trust me on that, and hang in there.  If you go to the YBOP website, look for Gary Wilson's radio show series (on the right column) and listen to those of you have time, as he gives some really good science about what's going on in the brain as it craves more stimulus.  The Coolidge effect is one portion that may help explain what you are experiencing.
Just keep in mind that the brain will heal itself, it just takes some longer than others. 
Hang in there Bro! 

 

[Bumper]

That's good to know, True2Myself, and gives me a little hope that there is an end eventually.

This is a problem I'm having too just now. The fantasies seem to be relentless. Triggers are everywhere! I try to dismiss them as quick as I can but sometimes I find myself thinking about them for a little while (maybe just 30sec or a minute at worse) but it's enough to get me excited - although I have so far always been able to stop as soon as that happened.

This has definitely been the hardest part so far for me. I've been porn free for over a month now and not been very tempted to go back but the fantasies are very tempting. I don't feel like I want to let go of them.