Artificial Stumli: what counts and what doesn't?

Hi All,

I tried searching to see if a post already existed for this, but I can't seem to find one.

I always assumed that porn/nudity was the thing to avoid when rebooting, and since fairly successfully rebooting (not sure how successful as no actual opportunities for sex came up), I began to MO again, and would tend to use either fantasy of real past experiences with ex girlfriends, or go back to e-mail/chat conversations we'd had with sexual content.

Was doing fine, but went limp again 18 days ago.
It was weird, had an erection but did not O in the day (literally couldn't O for trying).
Tried again in the night and nothing, and had some semis with a lot of trying since, but nothing solid.

The only thing I can put it down to is using said conversations as stimulation.

So I guess I'm asking: Is EVERYTHING an artificial stimulant unless it is you using just your imagination (not porn fantasy) or reflecting on past real experiences?
 
Hey Mookie,

In my experience what counts and what doesn't is different for just about everyone. Recovery is a road with a lot of bumps, dead ends and, bonus: no real map. For what it's worth given your experience, perhaps for now fantasy and memories are not ok for this part of the journey. They do effect the same areas of the brain as porn, so they might compound the issue for you.

I know for me (day 2 of my latest, hopefully last reboot) anything other than sex with my wife is off limits. In my case, other than porn, it includes but is not limited to: sexually explicit song lyrics, checking out every hot guy and girl I see (I identify as bisexual), fantasy, Google image searches for otherwise seemingly harmless stuff, reading Men's Health or GQ, movies with sex, the list is very very long.  I need to cleanse totally (or detox really) so that my brain doesn't scream for those big hits of dopamine all the time.

Hope that helps a bit. This takes a while man. Keep moving forward.
 
Anonguy037 said:
Hey Mookie,

In my experience what counts and what doesn't is different for just about everyone. Recovery is a road with a lot of bumps, dead ends and, bonus: no real map. For what it's worth given your experience, perhaps for now fantasy and memories are not ok for this part of the journey. They do effect the same areas of the brain as porn, so they might compound the issue for you.

I know for me (day 2 of my latest, hopefully last reboot) anything other than sex with my wife is off limits. In my case, other than porn, it includes but is not limited to: sexually explicit song lyrics, checking out every hot guy and girl I see (I identify as bisexual), fantasy, Google image searches for otherwise seemingly harmless stuff, reading Men's Health or GQ, movies with sex, the list is very very long.  I need to cleanse totally (or detox really) so that my brain doesn't scream for those big hits of dopamine all the time.

Hope that helps a bit. This takes a while man. Keep moving forward.

Hey there, thanks very much for the comments, and your perspective, it's definitely given me food for thought.

I'm definitely with you regarding nudity and whatnot in movies, though if I ever see it, I just try to look away from the naughty bits lol.

Good luck :)
 
Anonguy037 said:
Anytime. This path is way the hell too hard to do on our own.

Thank you x

PM me anytime if you like (though I'll be honest and say I am slow in responding, though if you do want to chat regularly I'd be up for exchanging e-mail addresses after getting to know one another...jeez, I sound like I am coming onto you lol!).
 
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