Can i use a fleshlight to quit porn?

tryinaquitfast

New Member
Hi, 23 year old guy. Used to do PMO 1-2 times a day for the last year. Before that used to do it once every 3 days for 6 years. Have a porn addiction. Mild PIED. Have been on hard mode for the last 9 days and intend to keep going. However, things are getting difficult. I dont wanna give up on my reboot though. Is it alright if i use a fleshlight as an aid to help stay off of porn. Im okay with my reboot getting slowed down as long as it keeps going. Dont wanna touch porn EVER AGAIN.
 
N

Numez

Guest
Reboot getting slowed down does not mean simply positive changes are going to take longer to show up. It also means negative stuff is going to linger for longer and it takes more suffering to quit. Anyone looking for porn subs as a way to ease suffering already is obviously not gonna be able to deal with it for the even longer period of time. If you deal with cravings differently they may start decreasing after 3 months but if you keep feeding them they are gonna stay around for a lot longer. Maybe never leave... Why would they if you feed them? They may increase, demand more and more from you.

Feeding porn cravings never works. Whether its masturbation, fleshlight, sexting, social media... whatever you use to sexually arouse yourself is not gonna work well for you. You are alone in your room trying to sexually please yourself. Thats pretty much description of a porn use. You are addicted to that, if you want to quit, it does not make much sense to keep doing it in your reboot.



 

doneatlast

Well-Known Member
Johnny Trailer said:
Reboot getting slowed down does not mean simply positive changes are going to take longer to show up. It also means negative stuff is going to linger for longer and it takes more suffering to quit. Anyone looking for porn subs as a way to ease suffering already is obviously not gonna be able to deal with it for the even longer period of time. If you deal with cravings differently they may start decreasing after 3 months but if you keep feeding them they are gonna stay around for a lot longer. Maybe never leave... Why would they if you feed them? They may increase, demand more and more from you.

Feeding porn cravings never works. Whether its masturbation, fleshlight, sexting, social media... whatever you use to sexually arouse yourself is not gonna work well for you. You are alone in your room trying to sexually please yourself. Thats pretty much description of a porn use. You are addicted to that, if you want to quit, it does not make much sense to keep doing it in your reboot.

Agreed 100%.  You're just trying to feed the monster a different diet, when it needs to be starved.  It is like trying to kick alcoholism by switching to a different kind of booze. 

Stick to hard mode as best you can, that is your surest and most proven route.  Yeah, a relapse sans porn is better than a relapse with porn, but no relapse is best.  And, creating little cheats for yourself is just the addicted brain trying to trick you.  Don't get a fleshlight, and if you have one already, throw it out.
 

Gabe Deem

Administrator
Staff member
Admin
Moderator
Yes, you can.

Check this out: http://legacy.rebootnation.org/index.php?topic=67.0
 

joepanic

Well-Known Member
Hmmmmm  I noticed one of the responses  to your question  contained a reference to "porn sub"  no where in your question did you state you would  be using a porn sub  the next person just totally agreed  with the 1st response  and finally a hand of reason(no pun intended) showed up  and made a little more sense  and finally a man  with probably the most insight  gave you the simplest answer  I agree  go and use it as long as your not viewing porn(or subs) for that matter  we are hear to quit porn  not become monks  With that being said  if using it  takes you to porn on any level  well you know the answer to the future use

    as always post often it helps me it helps you
 

Pete McVries

Active Member
I would strongly advise against it. Of course you can quit porn while using a fleshlight. But if you want to develop a healthy sexuality, mating a pocket lamp on a regular basis that has a secret silicone opening that looks like a vagina is what you should avoid at all costs. In my mind at least.

Isn't it totally effed up that we all know what a god damn fleshlight is? How far have we as a western society have come that 'fleshlight' has a steady place in our active vocabulary?
 

WoundedSparrow

Active Member
I wouldn't. Masturbatory fantasies are still masturbatory fantasies, whether you get them from your own brain or through porn. That novelty keeps you addicted. Best to avoid it.
 

quitforeverthenwin2

Well-Known Member
Before I found about yourbrainonporn.com etc. I had tried a fleshlight as I thought I had "deathgrip syndrome" it was a huge problem and made things worse. A fleshlight, in my opinion, is a much more intense form of masturbation. I don't see how a fleshlight fits into a healthy sex life.

I think MOing without porn is better then a fleshlight. And ideally you can make it through the reboot without any of this stuff. Think about it, a fleshlight is artificial sexual stimulation just like porn, so why replace one with the other.
 
Personally, I would continue to explore what might be gained from an extended period of time without orgasm entirely. 9 days is hardly long enough to be able to say with certainty that you should or shouldn't be doing anything. If you cave, that's alright, but I think it's important to hold clear your intention and set your boundaries very distinctly.

Go for it!
 
W

wecandoit

Guest
If I understand correctly, your question is if you could masturbate (with a fleshlight) to deal with the urges without PMO. I couldn't talk about it from a scientific point of view but I could talk about it from my experiences. I've masturbated a few times (without porn) during longer streak and what I want to say is that I didn't like masturbating. I like the semen retention benefits, the benefits of keeping that energy inside me and not throwing it away with masturbation.

After a month on hard mode, I felt on top of the world. I had a lot of energy, motivation, low anxiety, no depression, I was overall more "alive" to the point where people (who knew me as a quiet, lethargic guy) asked me: "What's with you today? Did you drink too much coffee?" And I answered: "No, but I am full of life." Because I really felt full of life.

But then following a tough round of urges, I decided to masturbate without porn and this sent me into a flatline that made me feel the opposite of "full of life" from earlier. I told myself right there that I didn't like masturbating and then feeling like this. Plus, the whole day a chaser effect was killing me. I barely survived the day without masturbating again and it would've probably made me binge on masturbation, which wasn't what I had in mind. It also pushed me so close to checking some stimulating stuff online. The risk of going back to porn is not worth it. I think this is the number one reason why I wouldn't masturbate again: The fact that it could make me lose my mental balance and go back to binging on porn.

But anyway, this is my experience. I don't know what to say, maybe everyone should find their reason why they want or don't want to masturbate.
 
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