Rebooting trough self-parenting

[k-fff]

Thank you for the question. Awesome question.

We have the power of awareness/attention/focus. We can put my attention to reading a book. We can also put attention to working out. Or we can also put attention to watching P.

Basically I am saying we have free* will.

* terms and limits apply.

I consider myself responsible for where I put my attention to. How I respond to something. This is my responsibility. I'd say that between stimulus and response lies responsibility.

If I get triggered by something. How I react to this is both my free will. A freedom of choice that nobody can take away even if they take everything else. But this is also my responsibility. I am responsible for my thoughts and emotions, my values and my attitude.

The elites have gone to great lengths to influence us. Have limitless amounts of pornography available online... Not a coincidence. It is also not a coincidence the P people are rich. And I am not seeing Gabe making any profit by doing what is good for society.

It definitely is intentional there is a reason serious countries completely ban p and considering how the media loves to demonize anti-p attitudes as basically evil says a lot. They same people that are saying we are not having enough children in the west are the same people responsible for pushing p into every aspect of our daily lives and destroying countless relationships. The damage to male and female relationships because of p has been catastrophic and yet the vast majority of people don't question why we have sex shoved in our faces everyday.

 

[EarthWalker]

Hi, k-fff. Thank you for the comment.

Day 1.

I came across some very triggering material on YT while searching for something else (totally non P related). I was a tired. Didn't expect this to happen. The 20+ years of brainwashing took over. Autopilot.

The only good thing I am finding lately is that P isn't really turning me on the way it has. I don't even like it. This are just images on computer! I don't want this. But there is this need for a release. Like a pressure cooker that needs to release the pressure.

My day lacks structure. I lack discipline. I will work on changing this. My routine is slightly improved.

I need to become more disciplined. So to make a complete system of recovery. There needs to be a component of also improving the discipline.

I'll make something happen.

EW

 

[Sanders]

Hey,

Sorry to hear you've relapsed. I don't know if you're using it already or not but the Google SafeSearch or YouTube restricted mode can help a lot in avoiding these accidental triggers. Of course they can't block everything nor heal you instantly, but it definitely helps especially in these cases.

I trust you can create the discipline and continue your journey!

 

[EarthWalker]

Day 2.

Thank you Sanders. Good advice. I never found P blockers to be effective for me. Hopefully they are for others. But this is good.

Wish everyone a good day.
EW

 

[EarthWalker]

Day 1 again.

I'll start posting 1x per week or something like that.

The reasons are many. One is that my day has no structure. Wake up late. Like wake up on the wrong foot. Everything is off.

I'll start by focusing on having some structure in my day. Morning and evening routine.

I can listen to an audiobook before bed. This will make me reduce screen time automatically. And first thing in the morning I can take a walk.

Wish everyone a good day
EW

 

[stepbystep]

Hey EW, hang in there. I agree that having structure and being busy with activities makes a huge difference in our entire life experience. Hope you get to that structure!

 

[Phineas 808]

Be encouraged, EW! A daily structure, discipline, is good overall in becoming the person you want to be.

As you know- it's not all about getting away from bad habits, as it is going forward toward who you were meant to be, who you are by nature.

Be that, and let everything else fall away.

 

[EarthWalker]

Thank you stepbystep and Phineas 808.

Day 3.

I am working on my structure.

Outlast the hormones/triggers. That is indeed a good approach.

EW

 

[happydude619]

Thank you Sanders. Good advice. I never found P blockers to be effective for me. Hopefully they are for others. But this is good

I came to thinking the same after I'd used a P-blocker for a while. Whenever I had a big urge to consume P, I actually found that having the P-blocker caused me to almost whip myself into a frenzy as I furiously searched for any P that wasn't blocked. Faster and faster I searched, thinking of different things to search for that were P but that the blocker might not recognise as P. I'd sometimes be searching for 30-40+ minutes and when I reflected on this behaviour, I felt that this was probably more damaging than if I'd been able to quickly and simply access P and get the PMO out of the way in far less time and without the frenzied behaviour. But as you say, if they [P blockers] help other people that's great as we each have our own individual recovery 'toolkit'

 

[EarthWalker]

Day 4.

I'll start with simple stuff.

I can skip wasting time being on the phone in the morning. I can just get out of bed and check my emails and cat memes on the computer not in bed.

Aim low. That doesn't mean don't aim.

Wish everyone a good day.
EW

 

[Phineas 808]

Good plan, EW.

Go for the low hanging fruit, as that builds our confidence.

Good job on day 4.

 

[EarthWalker]

Thank you Phineas 808.

 

[EarthWalker]

Day 5

Getting up instead of staying in bed on the phone isn't as hard.

In the evening I did some stretching. I like evening stretch for some reason. I find this very suitable time. There are plenty of videos on YouTube. Small changes.

Wish everyone a good day
EW

 

[imsorrynotsorry]

Hey EarthWalker,

you are fighting and that is of great value.

The part where you spoke about semen and energy - i like that very much. Since you've read about my issues lately, i've informed myself about stuff like this. With every O we are loosing semen and so we are loosing parts of us, high energy in other terms. And this energy is there for creating new lifeforms. We must not spoil it away and therefore keep it inside of us and deal with the energy it brings, because not Oing is bringing so much energy to our lifes. And for a lot of us addicts here, this energy is also too much to handle. When we don't O, there will be a hole which we can't fill immediately.

It's our responsibility to be creative and find ways to fill that hole with something good and new. Everything that gives us the feeling that it's right to live like that.

Imsor

 

[EarthWalker]

Hi, Imsor. Appreciate the message. I don't see any other choice but to keep at it. Like a dog barking at the door. Not going to end barking anytime soon.

I read somewhere that healing the body is really about healing the soul. If the soul is sick and we don't attend to healing the soul then healing the body will be meet with limited success. I find there is a whole lot of truth in this.

About the O. If you O during "love making" with your SO. I don't think you are losing energy. I think the intent behind it matters a lot.

PMO is selfish. Oing with your SO, I don't think this is selfish.

Day 1.

I lost my why. Why am I doing the reboot. Does anything really matter? While I am not very social guy. I do miss some human interaction. A few friends I have kids and are busy with that. One friend I talk to a few days per week is having a baby soon.

I need to start somewhere. Might as well start with my mindset.

Quite the self-mastery experience. Would have prefer if the difficulty level would be less. But what is given is not earned.

I'll look into the why.

Wish everyone a good day
EW

 

[Phineas 808]

EW, like yourself, I'm not very social either. This works against me, it seems. Relationships with others is very challenging for me, always has been- but I feel it's part of a 'greater reboot' for me...

Wishing you strength and determination in finding your why, and mindset is a good place to start.

Be healthy, in soul and body.

 

[EarthWalker]

Thank you Phineas. This year is a good time as any to make some changes. Wish you all the best.

 

[EarthWalker]

Dear, RN community.

Wish you (us) all a meaningful and healthy new year 2021.

I feel like 2021 will be a great year for personal and spiritual growth.

Wish all of you the best now and in all ways.

EW

 

[imsorrynotsorry]

Hello EarthWalker,

thank you. I also wish you a good new year - make 2021 your year.

Our journey has not ended yet and we will travel for the rest of our lifes. No matter where we are right now, knowing that we are still together is enough for me and gives me the energy to travel on.

The addiction will always hound us and we will always walk away from it. Some point in life the addiction can't keep up with us.

 

[EarthWalker]

Hello, Everyone.

Just wanted to say Hi. Wish everyone much luck on their respected journeys.

I am trying some new things. I'll write more about them if they pan out.

I am now on Day 40. The weekend was very triggering but I got trough it.

On day 28. I started like a week of wet dreams. 2 days in a row wet dreams, then a few days off, then again 2 days in a row of wet dreams.

The change is pretty hard on the nervous system. Have a very hard time getting anything done at work.

EW