Hi, Imsor.
Thanks for stopping by. Appreciate it. Sorry guys for not being active and posting more and trying to be more helpful. I feel like quietly doing my thing in the background and posting some updates here and there.
The MO, how do you think of it?
I got ED and PE with the keep the thoughts to a minimum and try to focus on the body as much as possible MO. Pretty depressing stuff. But nothing is forever. I believe I can change this.
I still think it was the right call to MO. It was valentines day. Our global brain (look up 100 monkeys effects) effects our individual brains and vice versa. Alternatively I'd be looking at a full day of being miserable dealing with the P urges until I am worn down and relapse late in the evening. After the MO in the morning, it was a relatively uneventful rest of the day in terms of urges and all were under control.
What i want to say is, it doesn't matter where you are in the reboot, urges will come. Try to resist MO next time, it is highly likely they will creep up on you.
Spot on.
I am in a weird place. I don't want to PMO. I just don't feel like it. The P thoughts are there but they don't arouse me the way they did. It is going to be an uncomfortable ride for a little while still.
Also feeling like I should talk to people more. I started to value being able to just chat with someone. Before I guess P provided the socialization factor. Like you don't need to socialize...you have all this hot babes here who are to make any of your sexual perversions a reality...why need to talk to people at all? So I noticed this change.
Case in point. I ran across a group of people I used to hang out with. My "old" self would just become uncomfortable talking to a group and just pretend I don't know them. But I felt like I should say Hi. I just did that. Hi. How is everyone doing...a little small talk and that is it. I felt good about it. Small changes. Small talk is so much better than the screen.
But this need for release of sexual tension is there and builds over time. I don't know how to control/channel. With guys in relationships it is obvious how to channel it. So without having a healthy outlet for this. I will sadly keep MO on the table as a pressure valve release. When I do some lifestyle changes I hope the pressure will not build as much and the need for release will be substantially less.
escapeandnevercomeback, thank you for sharing, happy for you.
Wish everyone a good week.
EW