I haven't been on here in a few days, tbh I just forgot to write in my journal. I've gotten very good at being busy and time seems to fly these days.
It's strange not to "need" porn anymore. Dont get me wrong, sometimes I want it, but it's not the same, i'm not overwhelmed by thoughts and cravings and I'm OK with it tbh.
I have a partner now and we do stuff
and tbh we have great fun in the bed. Of course i suggested strip poker
she went for it
She recently has said she adores me, and now she says she loves me. I really do like her so much but I'm a little hesitant to open my heart completely right now. But there is massive chemistry between us.
Getting off porn and healing my brain (and believe me, its night and day) I'm now very much my own person. I stand on my own two feet and have become very independent. It needed to happen.
I can now see why so many relationships failed in my life. I hadnt grown up.
But being grown up doesn't mean getting out the Sunday paper and the tea pot. It just means take responsibility for your life. I have had more fun in the last two months than I had in the last two years!