11 Days and 22 hours.
Feeling pretty relaxed now. Just done a couple of guided mindfulness mediations. One on fortify about guiding the heart and the other from the daily calm on youtube about just being present.
I was feeling pretty tired and worn out beforehand. Been some jobs round the house. Sorting out sealing in boiler cupboard with help from my father and sorting out the bottom shelf myself and sealing it to make it cleaner, tidier and spider proof which is most important to my partner.
In between that I sorted out dinner for later. Sausage casserole which is cooking away in the slow cooker.
My partner phoned me while she was at work (as she still is while I type this out). We spoke about how are days were going. We hung up and she phoned me straight back. She said she didn't want to say it and it was hard to say but she was really struggling. I asked if she needed to take more time off. If she could talk to her manager or a colleague but her manager was out on bereavement and she didn't want to dump all the work load on her colleague. She said she didn't tell me cause she wanted me to fix it. I told her I know but I wanted to suggest things incase I could help in some way. Though obviously I wish i could fix it. I told her I know a lot of what she is feeling is my fault. She reminded me that saying that wasn't helpful as that made her feel like she couldn't talk to me about these things as would make her worry it would make me feel guilty/shame. I definitely see that. I need to be there for HER and not make it about myself.
I'm still worrying about the work situation. I got a weeks work booked in but that's not for a few weeks. It will be good money but we are going to have to sit down and work out our finances.
I think that is all I can think to type at this time.
I hope everyone is doing well out there.