Quitting Journal

Skilbeck

Member
Day 8 Complete.

Merry Christmas to everyone who is reading this, I hope that everyone is having a good one.

Overall a good day, But earlier I thought I could handle watching a documentary on Netflix with my Brother, turns out there were triggers and I started to panic, I struggle to watch TV with women on in a normal way because I am so used to seeing women in porn. Luckily I managed to stop watching it early and I have stayed clean so far which is good, my usual pattern is see trigger, panic, and see binging to porn as the only solution. I know how damaging and undignified to my self that is, and that accepting what has happened and moving on is the thing which is in my best interest. Tonight will probably be difficult because what I call my 'primal self' will be thinking about that moment, but I will embrace that will love and affirmation to get through tonight.

Here's to day 9!
 

Skilbeck

Member
Hi, it's been a while.

I've decided to use the forum again and start posting on a regular basis and overcome this addiction. Here goes to Day 1.
 

Skilbeck

Member
Day 1 complete.

Overall an average but productive day. Did some chores, work and did a workout at the gym in the evening. Mood wise I have felt pretty flat and numb, but I have faith that my mood will improve the further I get into my reboot.
 

Skilbeck

Member
Day 2 Complete.

Been a pretty bad day. Just felt fatigued and have had a headache all day. I assume its withdrawals.
 

Skilbeck

Member
Day 4 Complete.

Had a fairly productive afternoon followed by some pints at the pub with my mates. Gotta keep alert for tomorrow as I usually relapse soon after drinking alochol.
 

Skilbeck

Member
Binge Relapse.

Not a great day. Got back from band practice mid afternoon and didn't have a clue what to do with the rest of my day, the chaser was strong and I ended up binge relapsing unfortunately. Gonna do a retroactive self talk and try to learn from my mistake.
 
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