Nick 2.0

Nick Simons

Active Member
Hey Jerry - great to hear you are brining in some very positive new habits. I agree this is key to replace the old ones (particularly when you begin to realize just how much time you free up when you aren't wasting your life aware in the porn universe). Your new lifestyle is an inspiration - keep it up!

On to day 11 with my continuing focus on carving out 7 times in the day to have a mini "mindfulness" beak. The last few days I actually didn't incorporate the "7 breaks" rule as I was travelling with the fam on a short vacation - but now I am back in full swing, have already had 2 mini-breaks this morning, and feeling quite good about this simple but helpful centering ritual. Will continue to test drive for the rest of the week...
 

Phineas 808

Moderator
Staff member
Moderator
have already had 2 mini-breaks this morning, and feeling quite good about this simple but helpful centering ritual.

I find taking moments to be mindful throughout the day to be helfpul as well, although mine isn't planned out, but in being self-aware that one is being either mindless or dissociative.
 

Nick Simons

Active Member
Stepped away for a bit there as I got fully consumed by a 10 day work trip to LA. This is my first real "post COVID" work trip so I was eager / anxious to see how I would cope with the return to my former "on the road" lifestyle. Overall I was quite pleased with how things unfolded. Significantly fewer distracting thoughts and urges to relapse into my old lifestyle and instead just a far more healthy state of self awareness and self care permeating my experience. So I am feeling pretty good about where I am at and my headspace as I go into my fall busy season at work.

Moving forward, I think I will continue to focus on working my alarm based "mindfulness moments" sprinkled throughout the day. I had to abandon them on my trip to LA as it was impractical to use them (as my job has me around people pretty much every minute of my day when I am in work mode). So I will reset the mindfulness counter to day 1 as of yesterday when I returned from LA (so day 2 today) and shoot for 40 days of planned mindfulness breaks every day moving forward. My goal is not to make these alarm based triggers a part of my normal daily lifestyle - but rather to eventually practice mindfulness in an adhoc, natural way throughout the day - and I hope with the 40 days of alarm based reminders that it eventually becomes like second nature and I can then drop the planned alarms. We'll see how things go.

Stay strong y'all.
 

Nick Simons

Active Member
Day 3 of my next 40 day mini challenge and I'm feeling super chill as I get re-grounded at home after being away for 10 days.

Buoyed by my recent success in traveling abroad, I am feeling better about myself and also finding that I am starting to look more outwards and less inwards (translation - I am starting to realize just how self-centered I can be and how much better life is when I start caring for others more). Specifically, as I take a hard look in the mirror I realize just how selfish I have been these last 18 months with a family member (my wife's dad) who came to live with us when COVID hit. Long story short, I have been living with a fair degree of resentment given his intrusion into "my space" ... and I realize that I really need to let this go. I'm not sure if this is directly tied to my past 6 month journey to escape from my porn addiction but this is what is on my mind of late and so I wanted to lay it out there and make a commitment to be way more accepting and reframe how I see our relationship (which had always been quite great prior to him moving in).

Anyway, perhaps this is part of the whole re-assessing ones life when you start to let go of your porn chains ... but regardless it is something that is overdue to address. Stay strong everyone.
 

JerryTX

Active Member
Nick great posts and thanks for sharing. Glad your traveling and also doing it with little to no PMO triggers. Traveling for me was always tough but now I feel "free" and rarely have any major urges while spending the night out. I did realize a while back though that any alcohol while traveling is a dangerous mix as it drives the temptations way up. Good news I have learned from that and have moved forward. Keep posting and thanks for the inspiration!
 

Nick Simons

Active Member
A quick weekend check in ... feeling very grounded and balanced. From September through December is incredibly busy for me at work, so lots of high pressure, temptations and opportunities to slip up. So far I am doing so much better than any year since ... forever. Really dialed into making through this fall with my head above water.

Stay strong.
 

guitar1968

Well-Known Member
A quick weekend check in ... feeling very grounded and balanced. From September through December is incredibly busy for me at work, so lots of high pressure, temptations and opportunities to slip up. So far I am doing so much better than any year since ... forever. Really dialed into making through this fall with my head above water.

Stay strong.
Fantastic Nick. It's really great to hear.
 

JerryTX

Active Member
A quick weekend check in ... feeling very grounded and balanced. From September through December is incredibly busy for me at work, so lots of high pressure, temptations and opportunities to slip up. So far I am doing so much better than any year since ... forever. Really dialed into making through this fall with my head above water.

Stay strong.
Nick great to hear your success! Thanks for checking in and the strength and perseverance you have built will get you through these times! I have no doubt you will continue to destroy the PMO Beast!
 

Nick Simons

Active Member
A quick check in as it has been a week .. this is my super busy time of the year at work where it's a marathon of working pretty much 7 days a week right into December so my check-ins will be a bit spotty for a while.

Overall I would chalk this week up to a very strong week ... a fair bit of temptations (particularly as I start to get mentally fatigued at work) BUT I managed to stay the course and navigate myself back to my point of balance where I could breathe through the moment of temptation (literally) and not take the slippery path to further temptations. I must say that the alarm triggered "time outs" have really helped to start engraining in me some healthy mental muscles where I can become more fully present when adhoc triggers come along. I would say my recent practicing definitely helped me over the past week so I will continue to engrain the "mindfulness trigger" this week and see how it manifests in my journey.


Stay strong everyone ... I am grateful for all who are in this battle together and wish you strength and freedom.
 

Nick Simons

Active Member
Back on line ... after 6 weeks of pretty much flat out work. And now I am in the home stretch and coming up for air.

As I reflect on the last month and a half, I would definitely say that it has been my best fall (probably) ever. I will confess that I did have a few slips (minor) that brought me back into brushing up against porn again BUT they were much much less severe and perhaps most importantly, the way I was able to mentally keep these occurrences in perspective (without shame or residual triggers) was liberating and allowed me to be at peace with myself and continue forward free from any mental burdens. I think I am beginning to learn patience, acceptance, and forgiveness of myself (which I am hopeful eventually spills over to others outwardly ... and perhaps this is the lesson it is my destiny to learn from this journey I am on).

I look forward to being back on the grid and wish everyone profound strength as you make progress on your own path. Stay strong.
 

Nick Simons

Active Member
Just a quick check in to reconnect ... and establish a fresh 40-day goal. I would say that overall these past several months have been an A- in terms of my "escape from porn prison" - better than probably any fall I have had in decades ... but with still some unfinished work to really get me out of orbit and the pull or porns gravity on my life.

So I begin again ... entering into a new 40 days where I am not just trying to consistently win the battle against porn ... I am trying to create the right conditions so I avoid or minimize altogether the scenarios that start to trigger me in the first place. Better and healthier patterns that will be the foundation for the new me moving forward. I am on day 5 today ... and looking forward to the journey.

Stay strong all.
 
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