Day 61 - struggling, but need to keep going!

ukquit11

Member
Day 2

Another relapse today. Put simply, I became complacent and I took for granted that I could do exactly the same things that I have been doing during my previous streak, thinking that my levels of defenses would be the same. Before I knew it, I was in bed with my laptop and PMOing, without me even having a chance to react.

This has brought back the type of anxiety I was feeling during my initial posts on my journal, which has not been pleasant. I have combatted this through a heavy gym session on my lunch break, which has made me feel much better. One thing is for certain, my laptop can not be anywhere near me during the morning until I am better prepared to handle things.
 
According to me, you shoud train your brain brotha in such a way that laptop ,you tube access shouldn't make a difference during a reboot. try to control your mind while laying down with laptop craving for porn but not watching it, that'show you can win battle of controlling your mind. learn to focus in your surrounding.
all the best
 

ukquit11

Member
According to me, you shoud train your brain brotha in such a way that laptop ,you tube access shouldn't make a difference during a reboot. try to control your mind while laying down with laptop craving for porn but not watching it, that'show you can win battle of controlling your mind. learn to focus in your surrounding.
all the best
Thanks man, that is something I will try. I had things under control during my previous streak and was able to use my laptop without searching for porn, but it is something I need to train myself to do again now.
 

Dantes

Active Member
I think you are showing great character and great attitude by your reaction to this relapse. Now the first priority is perhaps to not let slip become a slide and get right back in the saddle. Keep going!
 

Phineas 808

Well-Known Member
Great job, ukquit!

I like how you changed up your daily routines, as that is huge! Remember a form of insanity is thinking something will change, but doing the same thing as always!

hurricane's idea, too, is a good one to show yourself that you're ultimately in control, and not the addiction. Of course, make sure you in a good headspace first... Just the other night the thought of taking my phone to the bathroom in the middle of the night kept coming to me... So, I got it, but purposely set it on the sink while I took care of business, and didn't open it for anything.

Good bounce back...
 
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