My Story/Looking for Advice

So, to begin, I'm new here. I found this forum through I'm 37 now and have been addicted to porn since I was probably 8, after I found my cousin's huge stash of Playboys and Hustlers. It also didn't help that I was molested by several different people (including my babysitter, my cousin and my "friend"). My parents were also incredibly neglectful and abusive (haven't spoke to them in years after one of them went to jail). I believe the self-hatred that those early experiences generated fueled my insatiable desire for porn, to silence the demons in my head.

When I hit puberty, my libido kicked into overdrive and I began to masturbate at least 10-15 times a day. A little much, right? I felt ashamed and it made me weird inside, so much so that I had trouble making friends or dating girls. I was an above-average looking guy and girls at my school would frequently ask me out, but I was too damaged to form and maintain normal healthy relationships. The boys at school took notice and that's when the harassment and bullying began. Everyday they made fun of me for being "gay"; needless to say it didn't help my self-confidence. It lasted for years. I became suicidal and my addiction increased.

At 16 or so, internet porn came into my life and I began downloading hardcore porn constantly, through programs like Napster and Kazaa. It was around that time that I also began using drugs. And so went a ten year downward spiral into drugs, alcohol and porn... the three great addictions of my life... a habitual pattern of self-medication. After several DUIs and being busted with drugs, I evidently met my now wife and my world changed. She stuck it out with me through my emotional abuse and substance addictions. With her help, I can confidently say that I've been drug and alcohol free for almost 7 years.

Now, I finally want to tackle my pornography addiction, for her, for my two kids and mostly for myself. I haven't maintained even a week of porn sobriety since I started using internet porn. I have two days under my belt now. I would say three, but I briefly glanced at porn and I don't want to count that. Some positive steps I've taken include meditation. I try to do at least an hour a day and it's really helped me noticed my thought patterns. I've also put anti-porn apps on my phone, put up barriers on Reddit, got rid of my social media, deleted my porn and got on SSRIs for my crippling depression.

The only difficult thing is that I'm an artist. I paint large canvases and need large expanses of time alone to pull off intricate pieces. I've worked nonstop for years, but recently I've decided to take a month or two break. I've realized that I need to reboot my brain and spending all that time alone is opening the door for relapse.

Anyway, happy to be apart of this community. Sorry my story is so depressing. Any encouragement and advice would be greatly appreciated. 
First of all, congratulations on stopping drug and alcohol use. It is something that few manage to do these days. It testified to a real desire to move forward. I was like you and my 16 years marked the age that I became aware of my addiction and that is also the age that I started trying to quit porn. Only like you I have had a series of failures and my method therefore seemed bad. Then I came across this ebook which really saved my life. As I speak to you, I no longer want porn and I have no fear that one day I will come back. The solution to my problem: an ebook that I simply read and followed the instructions to the letter. My advice to you is to read this ebook and I hope it will help you get out of your addiction. Good luck.