chicubs2099
New Member
Hello all.
As I'm sure it is for everyone, this is equally tough and embarrassing for me. I've never had a full on discussion with anyone about my addiction to porn, but here it goes.
I'm 32. I was first introduced to pornography around age 5 or 6. My mother and stepfather are both artists, and they would sometimes turn to Playboy or Penthouse magazine for body references. I remember catching a peek of some graphic sexual material in Penthouse magazine during this time.
When the internet became huge in the late 90s, my porn usage became a problem pretty quickly, and it grew from there. I was masturbating frequently, several times a day, and even when I lost my virginity at the age of 16, I was still turning to porn DVDs, internet porn or magazines when I wasn't engaging in real-life physical sexual activity.
Porn really didn't start affecting my sexual performance, however, until about 5 years ago. I started noticing a dulled reaction to naked women, touch, etc., and when I would become aroused, my erections would either be less than 100% or last for a short period of time.
I am now in a serious relationship and am engaged to be married, and while I am madly in love with and attracted to my fiance, our sex life is virtually non-existent. I lack anything resembling a sex drive. Passion is lacking. I find myself turning over in bed after she falls asleep to masturbate to porn on my phone. Or, I'll sneak away to my computer and relieve myself. Porn has also become a problem at work, as I'll sometimes use my downtime in the office to sneak away to the bathroom.
I need help.
I'm active. I work out five days a week. I stay busy with my work - I'm a journalist and also do photography on the side. But my problem is the blocks of time in between and how I'm filling them.
I want to reinvigorate my libido and my relationship/sex life with my fiance before it's too late.
I took the first step and blocked porn sites from my phone since that is the main device in which I consume pornography.
If anyone can shed light on other ways to fight cravings and urges, and provide insight on steps to take to help repair my sexual connection with my fiance, I'd greatly appreciate it.
Thanks,
Joe
As I'm sure it is for everyone, this is equally tough and embarrassing for me. I've never had a full on discussion with anyone about my addiction to porn, but here it goes.
I'm 32. I was first introduced to pornography around age 5 or 6. My mother and stepfather are both artists, and they would sometimes turn to Playboy or Penthouse magazine for body references. I remember catching a peek of some graphic sexual material in Penthouse magazine during this time.
When the internet became huge in the late 90s, my porn usage became a problem pretty quickly, and it grew from there. I was masturbating frequently, several times a day, and even when I lost my virginity at the age of 16, I was still turning to porn DVDs, internet porn or magazines when I wasn't engaging in real-life physical sexual activity.
Porn really didn't start affecting my sexual performance, however, until about 5 years ago. I started noticing a dulled reaction to naked women, touch, etc., and when I would become aroused, my erections would either be less than 100% or last for a short period of time.
I am now in a serious relationship and am engaged to be married, and while I am madly in love with and attracted to my fiance, our sex life is virtually non-existent. I lack anything resembling a sex drive. Passion is lacking. I find myself turning over in bed after she falls asleep to masturbate to porn on my phone. Or, I'll sneak away to my computer and relieve myself. Porn has also become a problem at work, as I'll sometimes use my downtime in the office to sneak away to the bathroom.
I need help.
I'm active. I work out five days a week. I stay busy with my work - I'm a journalist and also do photography on the side. But my problem is the blocks of time in between and how I'm filling them.
I want to reinvigorate my libido and my relationship/sex life with my fiance before it's too late.
I took the first step and blocked porn sites from my phone since that is the main device in which I consume pornography.
If anyone can shed light on other ways to fight cravings and urges, and provide insight on steps to take to help repair my sexual connection with my fiance, I'd greatly appreciate it.
Thanks,
Joe
