is this a sign of healing?

hervesta

Member
So I currently am in a very depressing flatline after having a total of 12 days last month of basically being healed then going back to 0 for some reason. However in this 2 week and 1 days flatline (as of now) I noticed that a lot of my memory of porn usage is gone or at least now hidden, that my sexual dreams and most of my intrusive thoughts are now of things akin to stuff I watched the first 2 years of my porn addiction (which was before I started to escalate), and that some intrusive thoughts are now of doing vanilla things with real girls I know IRL. Oh and something interesting too is that last night I remembered a sexual fantasy I used to get often as a pre-teen before I discovered what porn really was. Are all of these signs I am healing even in a flatline?
 

ukquit11

Member
Sounds like the process I have been through in terms of your thoughts and that your brain is resetting - a good sign to me!
 
hervesta said:
So I currently am in a very depressing flatline after having a total of 12 days last month of basically being healed then going back to 0 for some reason. However in this 2 week and 1 days flatline (as of now) I noticed that a lot of my memory of porn usage is gone or at least now hidden, that my sexual dreams and most of my intrusive thoughts are now of things akin to stuff I watched the first 2 years of my porn addiction (which was before I started to escalate), and that some intrusive thoughts are now of doing vanilla things with real girls I know IRL. Oh and something interesting too is that last night I remembered a sexual fantasy I used to get often as a pre-teen before I discovered what porn really was. Are all of these signs I am healing even in a flatline?

Same thing happens with me. I am at 70 days hard mode. I started getting very vanilla intrusive thoughts like just kissing or holding someone I know in real life after some time in the hard mode process. I think for me too it has been that the memories and triggers associated to porn use have diminished considerably over a period of time. Though still I feel like there are days when I engage in too much YouTube or something like that even though not explicitly sexual- my brain almost associates it with porn like behaviour
 

hervesta

Member
JnanaYogiKarmaYogi said:
hervesta said:
So I currently am in a very depressing flatline after having a total of 12 days last month of basically being healed then going back to 0 for some reason. However in this 2 week and 1 days flatline (as of now) I noticed that a lot of my memory of porn usage is gone or at least now hidden, that my sexual dreams and most of my intrusive thoughts are now of things akin to stuff I watched the first 2 years of my porn addiction (which was before I started to escalate), and that some intrusive thoughts are now of doing vanilla things with real girls I know IRL. Oh and something interesting too is that last night I remembered a sexual fantasy I used to get often as a pre-teen before I discovered what porn really was. Are all of these signs I am healing even in a flatline?

Same thing happens with me. I am at 70 days hard mode. I started getting very vanilla intrusive thoughts like just kissing or holding someone I know in real life after some time in the hard mode process. I think for me too it has been that the memories and triggers associated to porn use have diminished considerably over a period of time. Though still I feel like there are days when I engage in too much YouTube or something like that even though not explicitly sexual- my brain almost associates it with porn like behaviour

Wasting time on youtube, though mimics addictive behavior, is not a super stimuli so it wont do anything to you. As of now I am in an almost 3 week flatline, but my brain is now pruning memories of porn i watched literally the first months of my addiction, though I still have the more recent stuff in memory, so I am not sure if that is a good sign.
 
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