I need to up my game.

Phineas 808

Phineas 808

Moderator
Staff member
Moderator
Escapeandnevercomeback said:
Day 2

Is it the fact that I haven't completed a full PMO since December 27 the reason for the urges these past 2 days? Cause I'm pretty tempted.
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It's just the fact that it's been an ongoing habit that the urges are coming up, that's all. But, basically, Yes.

But again, even if you completed a full PMO, the urges would only continue whenever you're cued (triggered) to act on them next.

Wishing you strength, brother.
 
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Escapeandnevercomeback

Respected Member
Phineas 808 said:
It's just the fact that it's been an ongoing habit that the urges are coming up, that's all. But, basically, Yes.

But again, even if you completed a full PMO, the urges would only continue whenever your cued (triggered) to act on them next.

Wishing you strength, brother.
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Yes, man, you're right. I actually wanted to say: "Is it the fact that I didn't complete a full PMO since December 27, the reason why I am experiencing urges that soon?" I'm realizing this now. Anyway, the good news is that I didn't mess myself up all the way thanks to not completing my stupid plan to "take advantages" of the last days of the year and use the "New Year's resolution" thing. I'm actually grateful for my actions.
 
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Phineas 808

Phineas 808

Moderator
Staff member
Moderator
Escapeandnevercomeback said:
Yes, man, you're right. I actually wanted to say: "Is it the fact that I didn't complete a full PMO since December 27, the reason why I am experiencing urges that soon?" I'm realizing this now. Anyway, the good news is that I didn't mess myself up all the way thanks to not completing my stupid plan to "take advantages" of the last days of the year and use the "New Year's resolution" thing. I'm actually grateful for my actions.
Click to expand...

Yes those not-so-minor victories are always worth celebrating! It's always good to disrupt a 'pmo-session'. I used to even set a timer if I knew my obsessions were 'going there'. 3-minutes, or 1-minute. Or, if I was going to do a search, I would tell myself "plot-twist!", then I'd look up a self-help video instead! Or, being a Christian, I'll even start worshiping God or praying ---> even while trying to look up crap! Talk about a major disruption..!

The fact that you flipped the script at the end of the year, despite the beast-brain's plans, I think, is a major step forward.
 
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Escapeandnevercomeback

Respected Member
Phineas 808 said:
Yes those not-so-minor victories are always worth celebrating! It's always good to disrupt a 'pmo-session'. I used to even set a timer if I knew my obsessions were 'going there'. 3-minutes, or 1-minute. Or, if I was going to do a search, I would tell myself "plot-twist!", then I'd look up a self-help video instead! Or, being a Christian, I'll even start worshiping God or praying ---> even while trying to look up crap! Talk about a major disruption..!

The fact that you flipped the script at the end of the year, despite the beast-brain's plans, I think, is a major step forward.
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Sure, man. I need to learn how to do a better job at disrupting this stupid repetitive habit. I am the "I've started anyway" type of guy. "I started edging to porn, what's the point in stopping now? But this is the last time, from tomorrow I'm 1 year porn-free." Typical listening to the addicted brain.
 
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Robby82

Member
It also happened to me yesterday to do some edging even if a little but I controlled myself and I did not masturbate this does not take away that it is wrong to do it I am not going to repeat it what made me think is how you feel the brain while you are looking porn clouds your head and you look like a drug addict while waiting for the dose..I feel stronger from the addiction now in other times I would have given in but now that I have the clear situation it is another story I am at DAY 50 now and I see results and also who I am is around notice an improvement in my person. The next time I feel tempted, a nice cold shower and bye bye FAP
 
Phineas 808

Phineas 808

Moderator
Staff member
Moderator
Escapeandnevercomeback said:
Sure, man. I need to learn how to do a better job at disrupting this stupid repetitive habit. I am the "I've started anyway" type of guy. "I started edging to porn, what's the point in stopping now? ..."
Click to expand...

Another thing that's helped me, like when I'm in the moment (or the act) is to say, "I don't have to do this..." Or, "What can I do to disrupt this?"

Think in terms of 'buzz-killer'- how can you disrupt the high the lower brain is trying to get? Breaking that cycle, that patterned behavior is so important for us.
 
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Escapeandnevercomeback

Respected Member
Phineas 808 said:
Another thing that's helped me, like when I'm in the moment (or the act) is to say, "I don't have to do this..." Or, "What can I do to disrupt this?"

Think in terms of 'buzz-killer'- how can you disrupt the high the lower brain is trying to get? Breaking that cycle, that patterned behavior is so important for us.
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That's right, man.
 
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Escapeandnevercomeback

Respected Member
Robby82 said:
It also happened to me yesterday to do some edging even if a little but I controlled myself and I did not masturbate this does not take away that it is wrong to do it I am not going to repeat it what made me think is how you feel the brain while you are looking porn clouds your head and you look like a drug addict while waiting for the dose..I feel stronger from the addiction now in other times I would have given in but now that I have the clear situation it is another story I am at DAY 50 now and I see results and also who I am is around notice an improvement in my person. The next time I feel tempted, a nice cold shower and bye bye FAP
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Good job, man. Keep up the good work.
 
96LostWanderer

96LostWanderer

Active Member
Escapeandnevercomeback said:
Sure, man. I need to learn how to do a better job at disrupting this stupid repetitive habit. I am the "I've started anyway" type of guy. "I started edging to porn, what's the point in stopping now? But this is the last time, from tomorrow I'm 1 year porn-free." Typical listening to the addicted brain.
Click to expand...

Exactly the same thoughts go through my head when I'm relapsing. But today I stopped a relapse before the point of orgasm, so although it counts as a relapse because I looked at porn, I actually managed to stop myself going further and further down the path. I think we need to adopt the mindset that starting and stopping is the next best thing after not starting at all. Starting and stopping is definitely better than continuing to binge, which must be doing the most alteration to our minds.
 
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Escapeandnevercomeback

Respected Member
96LostWanderer said:
Exactly the same thoughts go through my head when I'm relapsing. But today I stopped a relapse before the point of orgasm, so although it counts as a relapse because I looked at porn, I actually managed to stop myself going further and further down the path. I think we need to adopt the mindset that starting and stopping is the next best thing after not starting at all. Starting and stopping is definitely better than continuing to binge, which must be doing the most alteration to our minds.
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Exactly. You've said it well.
 
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Escapeandnevercomeback

Respected Member
Day 5

This is day 5 for me. Hard mode so far. But the urges haven't started yet. Now it's easy. But when the urges will start, I need to prepare a reaction otherwise I'm sitting duck.

I'm stressed out but the negatives are going to turn into the positives eventually. Five days without drinking too and this time I need to try harder to stay sober.
 
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MrTibs

Member
Escapeandnevercomeback said:
You're right, man. I guess I am too hard with myself. I guess there is a little bit of hate because I am 31 years old and I'm mad at myself for where I am in life. But yes, you can't change the past, you can only build a better future. I should not waste more important time thinking about the wasted time. Thanks for support.
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Man I swear, I read what you just said almost every day since. It is why I feel like myself and what I need to do I know it is gonna take some time. But I guess there’s only one way to eat an elephant one bite at a time.
 
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