All work and no play makes Jack a dull boy
Thanks for advice, bro!Congrats, Escape, on almost a month away from your unwanted behaviors! Proud of you, brother!
I know you were of a different mindset when you wrote this, but I think you have to confront this 'belief' so it doesn't bite you in the butt when you're faced with urges...
First, I know recovery is work, but also think of recovery as fun, as play- because you get to become someone you thought you could never be, and that's freakin' exciting! Conquering these long standing addictions, finally, this year, is exciting! Nothing dull about that!
Second, PMO and drinking = poison, and not play! You have to kill that freaking lie! If I lapse to P, PMO, or MO, it's not playtime for me, as the pleasure is extremely short lived (like cotton candy), and then I'm left with the consequences (cavities).
Like Zaraki suggested, find other things that you find fun or exciting to occupy your time with. When I've had time off to myself, I write out a list to make sure I take advantage of it, and do things I really love. In other words, redefine what you think of as 'fun' and what you think of as 'play'- you deserve to enjoy yourself, just not with poison.
You got this, brother!
Your doing great dude! Never forget what got you to this spot of 29 days free!Day 29
Urges have not been high recently. Is this the calm before the storm? I should probably prepare for other rounds of hard urges. I've been kind of lethargic even. Social anxiety has gone down a little bit but it's still present. I wonder whether my high social anxiety is really porn induced or not. I guess I have to continue the cold turkey for a few more months to find out.
Robby, do you have a journal on this forum? lol. A lot of the posts you make in this journal seem like tracking your own progress?Browser microsoft edge permanently blocked and even mobile phone finally I made it I managed not to Nutting with edging but better to avoid it anyway it hurts a little for the brain even if you do not ejaculate have a good trip to all of you guys
No I don't have it and I'm not going to have it but I want to share my progress here every now and then to compare myself and maybe help someoneRobby, do you have a journal on this forum? lol. A lot of the posts you make in this journal seem like tracking your own progress?
Robby, I don't want you to get upset at me saying this but I think it's more correct to create your own journal. I am trying to avoid triggers, graphic details and such, and I don't know what you might write one day, like some days ago when you wrote about escorts and triggered me. I didn't say anything at that time but maybe I should've. My biggest problem is my fantasy and this used to sabotage me all the time in the past, this time I'm trying to avoid fantasizing. I welcome support and advice for sure. Thank you for understanding.No I don't have it and I'm not going to have it but I want to share my progress here every now and then to compare myself and maybe help someone
Checking out that thread!Day 30
By going back to my "Dopamine to the minimum" approach, this is the second most controlled month in my years long recovery attempt. The first one was during the summer of 2021 using the same approach. I want to thank William for this. I encourage people to read his thread, even the first few pages can teach you a lot. I've developed this approach after reading and re-reading his thread. It's obviously something that works for me.
The mindset is also important. What's the point anymore in starting edging to porn if the pleasure doesn't last forever? It lasts for a while and then I get drained and I feel empty. It's not worth it to keep living the consequences of porn addiction for a short period of pleasure. All the impact that this stupid addiction has on my brain... If I've made it this far, I might as well continue. I hate to start from day 1 again and I don't think my mind will tolerate another try, for months. It goes like this: When the mind moves from being uncomfortable to being comfortable again, it doesn't want to go back to being uncomfortable (This is something that David Goggins said - Shout out to Logicprox). This 30 days long streak hasn't been a breeze, I didn't laugh my way through it, it had its level of discomfort.
The recovery is very possible, if it wasn't, nobody would accomplish it, we would have no recovered people. But since they exist, we can do it too. Never stop trying to find what works for you. There is no lost case. It might be harder for some, easier for others, but we all have the tools in us to do it.
But I still have a lot of work to do. Without working on what keeps me connected to porn, porn will certainly come around to offer medicine again. "See? Your life sucks, you can't do shit, let me soothe you!" Really, porn?