guiganvoger
Active Member
I started drinking decaf coffee for the past month. I thought that I would hate it bit it actually gives me the coffee fix I crave without the caffeine jitters. Keep at it dude!
Caffeine amplifies my urges. And I hate to give it up. All this shit will suck. To have a chance with porn rebooting, I need to quit alcohol and caffeine and this will make me feel low as fuck.I started drinking decaf coffee for the past month. I thought that I would hate it bit it actually gives me the coffee fix I crave without the caffeine jitters. Keep at it dude!
Day 1
13 PMOs in just 10 days of this month. Fuckin shit.
I think the best thing you have to do is stay away from home as much as possible to see you with friends go to the gym play sports even go only for running the moment where you are weakest is when you are doing nothing that you can fall into temptationDay 1
13 PMOs in just 10 days of this month. Fuckin shit.
Thanks for advice.I think the best thing you have to do is stay away from home as much as possible to see you with friends go to the gym play sports even go only for running the moment where you are weakest is when you are doing nothing that you can fall into temptation
Thanks man.Mark it, track it, then forget it. It's a new day, go on with renewed purpose and intent.
About coffee, I feel you! Maybe you don't have to straight up quit that, but cut back a little?
Day 2
Only day 2 and I'm tempted already. This is fuckin crazy.
Day 3
I should not be so tempted after 9 PMOs in 2 days. After a binge like that, I should be in "mini-flatline" for at least a week so I don't know why those urges I don't like this.
Day 1
Feeling miserable mentally for two days got the best of me. I listened to the voice in my head that told me I could watch some porn without masturbating, I watched porn for a while and then of course I proceeded to PMO 3 times until half an hour before midnight. I can't continue like this, I need to do something about it.
Bro, you said it so well! I agree with everything. In my case, nothing sabotages me more than (hyper)sexual thoughts, a.k.a the porn-induced fantasies and flashbacks stored in my head. They start playing in my head to remind me that I'm supposed to watch porn, it's part of the withdrawal, but the best practice is to ignore them as soon as they start, because engaging with them, "watching them" get the dopamine going and the urges that follow are very hard to resist. Can they be endured? Yes, but it's always better to prevent than cure, it's always better to prevent giving yourself massive urges than torture yourself with them later. What we need to understand is that if we start the dopamine by hypersexual thoughts or seeing something (hopefully by mistake), we need to wait until the dopamine calms down, we don't need to do anything, sometimes I forget this. We need to let the dopamine calm down while avoiding to play porn in our heads, which is very important because you want to extinguish the fire but you keep throwing gas on it with the thoughts. When the urges start, they create this feeling of urgency, "I need to act now! I need to grab the pleasure now!" But we actually don't need to do anything. Yes, we actually need to do something: Avoiding thinking about porn and (it helps) to leave the place where you are (if you can) and disrupt the moment. All this is actually easy but our mind makes it complicated. I always like to come back to the "brainwashing" that it's discussed in Easy Peasy, probably the second best book in quitting porn after Your brain on porn. What happens is that porn enters our mind and makes us believe through brainwashing that it's something we need in our lives (for when we are bored, stressed, sad, sexually frustrated etc.) and that's why it gets complicated. But the process in itself is simple. Not pleasant but simple.Sorry for your current struggles, Escape.
You will find what works for you, I believe it! Like before, you read others' success stories, and were inspired, you will read and discover new approaches you maybe hadn't considered before, you will find new inspiration.
For me an analogy I could use is that my story was like I was sitting in a prison cell with the door open and the shackles just laying there. But instead of getting up and walking out, I was too used to shutting the door, and putting the shackles back on my hands- although, they're never locked.
This may not make sense, for that I apologize. But most of our 'bondage' is in our mind. We are needlessly stuck, when all we have to do is get up and (consistently) walk out. I said elsewhere recently, 'slay the dragon', but really, there is no slaying, only ignoring (consistently). It's like a movie on Merlin I saw years ago, the wicked witch was only powerful if others believed she was powerful. When you ignored her, all her powers disappeared.
Or, I like to compare it with Medusa: we think she's so beautiful we have to look, but she's so ugly we turn to stone (a 'hard heart'). How did Perseus defeat her? By making her look in the mirror of his shield, and when she saw herself, she turned herself into stone.
How to apply: Porn is Medusa. Instead of looking at her as some all-powerful monster, look in the mirror and learn about yourself, that you are in control. See porn for what it is, nothing in itself. When we take back power from external things, and from our own emotional states (anger, loneliness, depression), and see that nothing has power to make us do anything, we know ourselves...
That voice telling you that you can P without MO'ing was just your lower brain (your Medusa) trying to survive by keeping this habit going. Anything that suggests the future use of P and PMO is the 'beast-brain', and you can override this, ignore this, until it passes away, along with its urges.
Hope this somewhat helps, brother.