Alight, so it’s been a while since I posted. Basically I fell off the wagon before my 90 days Couple weeks back. This obviously sucked. But even before that I’ve been kinda ebbing and flowing between using porn subs (tinder being the big one) and staying free of the bullshit. So if I did hit the 90 days it wouldn’t really feel like to me that I did really hit the ninety days. Yeah, I stayed off porn for 80 whatever days, but my addict mind was getting it’s chemical hits in other ways. Not sure if this is making any sense, but basically I’m going to do a full digital detox.
I can’t remember the last time I watched porn, but I’m going to call today day 1. Going forward, that means no more porn, no more tinder, no more porn subs, no more digital distractions. The worst thing about all of this bullshit for me is that it’s like I’m drifting through life. Not really living at all and that’s fucking depressing. Life at the moment feels like being stuck in a bad dream that I can’t escape out of.