Just as I said: pleasure puts pain on hold for a little while and then when the pleasure is gone, the pain returns. In the end you realize it's not worth it to use a few moments of pleasure that in the long run create more problems than what we already have.Hey Escape, thx for your comment, hope your doing okay! Didn't visit your journal for some time as I am not very active at the moment.
Fucking sucks to loose your best years to depression! What helped you get out of it (at least to as far as you are now)?
I agree with your claim about pleasure only partly. Yes, we think about the pleasure. And this can be enough to get addicted, without having to deal with depression etc. BUT:
1. when you feel down all the time this short time where you feal pleasure will feel even more precious and you will get back to it even more, as you have to cope with other problems in life, because it helps you forget about them. So while you think about the pleasure, behind it stands the problems you don't want to face.
2. when you watch porn long enough you will eventually escalate to stuff you don't feel comfortable with and you hate yourself for watching it and still you do. So where does this pleasure come from? It comes from the relieve of the addiction! And this is nothing less than the ending of the pain that abstaining from your drug causes you!
3. So there are different factors here, the factor of unhealthy coping, the factor of relieving the pain from the abstinence of your drug and so on.
When you use coping to justify your porn use, that doesn't mean that utcis not a factor. Only that you use it as justification. Then you need to find more healthy mechanism.
But what I initially said is, that when you are abstinent long enough, that your withdrawals end, porn use will no longer give you the pleasure it did, because one big factor is gone. And when you realize and accept that porn use will never again be able to give you that pleasure it did, when you were addicted, you won't crave it any longer, or at least less.
Regarding what helped me get better with my depression: I still battle depression but it's not as bad as it used to be. I used to be very depressed and suicidal. I don't know how to explain it. Back then I was in a very bad place in my life. I was dealing with mental wounds from bullying in the past, I drank too much and binged porn. I suffered from very severe social anxiety (that stupidly never tried to treat) and I isolated myself from everybody. When I was about 24, I started addressing the bullying's repercussions. And, I don't know, it made my depression better but my life has never been even close to what I want it to be. I still deal with depression because of addictions and loneliness. Most days I am pretty okay, a little bit depressed but functional, but I have my deep depressive episodes especially when my porn recovery is going like shit. I don't know, I believe that if our depression is created by our life circumstances, working on them is the thing that will treat the depression. I'm sure I will feel way better without being addicted and lonely.