Believe You Can and You're Halfway There

Hello fellow Rebooters,

Day 1

This is my first post and the first time in my life I've ever admitted to myself or anyone that I'm a porn addict. Like many of you, I discovered porn around the age of 12. I am now 41. My porn addiction has kept me from becoming the man I am supposed to be. There is not a single area of my life that hasn't been affected by my addiction. I have tried to stop on many occasions and never made it past a week. I can't begin to voice the number of ways in which my life has suffered. I know only one thing, my life must change, and now is the time. I recently sought out help. I learned I must admit that I have a problem and that I can not solve it on my own. I joined this forum to share my story, journal my progress, and give support and encouragement. I understand this is the first step and already I feel better for having the courage to be here. To all those going through this process please don't stop. We owe it to ourselves, our families, friends, and all those that we come into contact with to become our best selves. You never know who might see your story and how you might inspire them to change or keep going.

Gratefully and Respectfully,

Mr. RedPill
 
Hi, Mr. Redpill, welcome and thank you for your story! I am on day 77 of the 2nd 90 day streak, since I decided and started wanting to recover completely from PMO on January 12, 2020.
It had never happened before reaching these goals even if small compared to the 565 days that have passed.
I fell several times but I always had in mind that I had to get up at any cost. One day at a time, as if it were always day zero.
I too started at 12, and I hit rock bottom well before I was 18. Real women did nothing, sooner or later I fell into PMO. The internet then mesmerized me.
I have always sexualized real women trying to reshape them on virtual ones. I am now in a phase of awareness aspects of what porn is and how, at 12, if I had had a life away from it and any media throwing it in my face, my manhood would have been different. It is not late but the stages of mourning must be crossed to take life back in hand. Good path on the path of liberation from PMO and surfing web.
 

guitar1968

Well-Known Member
Weclome @Mr. RedPill - you are at the right place. That is for sure. We are all taking it day by day here and trying to rid our lives of porn. This is the first place that I admitted to being a porn addict and it really does feel good to get things of our chests here. The support has been great and helpful, but of course, it comes down to each one of us to get past the addiction. I'm over 100 days on this streak, but it hasn't been perfect. No PMO, but I have snuck a few peaks here and there and felt desperate urges to go back many times. Coming here has helped me from going back. If I'm ready to fire up a browser and head back to my old stomping grounds, I come here and read a few journals. It really does help.

I wish you well on your journey. I'm happy to lend an ear if you need help. Feel free to DM me. Just keep coming back, even if you slip after a week. Come back right away. Talk about it. Try to go two weeks next time. Just don't give up. The streaks will get longer. And I'm told the images will begin to fade. I'm still waiting for this part but I know it has to be up ahead.

Good luck to you!
 
Weclome @Mr. RedPill - you are at the right place. That is for sure. We are all taking it day by day here and trying to rid our lives of porn. This is the first place that I admitted to being a porn addict and it really does feel good to get things of our chests here. The support has been great and helpful, but of course, it comes down to each one of us to get past the addiction. I'm over 100 days on this streak, but it hasn't been perfect. No PMO, but I have snuck a few peaks here and there and felt desperate urges to go back many times. Coming here has helped me from going back. If I'm ready to fire up a browser and head back to my old stomping grounds, I come here and read a few journals. It really does help.

I wish you well on your journey. I'm happy to lend an ear if you need help. Feel free to DM me. Just keep coming back, even if you slip after a week. Come back right away. Talk about it. Try to go two weeks next time. Just don't give up. The streaks will get longer. And I'm told the images will begin to fade. I'm still waiting for this part but I know it has to be up ahead.

Good luck to you!
I appreciate the words of support. What changes did you make in your life outside of journaling that has helped in your recovery? Therapy, coaching, etc.?
 
Hi, Mr. Redpill, welcome and thank you for your story! I am on day 77 of the 2nd 90 day streak, since I decided and started wanting to recover completely from PMO on January 12, 2020.
It had never happened before reaching these goals even if small compared to the 565 days that have passed.
I fell several times but I always had in mind that I had to get up at any cost. One day at a time, as if it were always day zero.
I too started at 12, and I hit rock bottom well before I was 18. Real women did nothing, sooner or later I fell into PMO. The internet then mesmerized me.
I have always sexualized real women trying to reshape them on virtual ones. I am now in a phase of awareness aspects of what porn is and how, at 12, if I had had a life away from it and any media throwing it in my face, my manhood would have been different. It is not late but the stages of mourning must be crossed to take life back in hand. Good path on the path of liberation from PMO and surfing web.
I appreciate the reply and show of support. When you relapsed what do you think caused it and what actions did you take to keep from having another? Also, what are your thoughts on identifying the root cause of your addiction? Are you relying on willpower alone or do you have a plan in place while on the path to recovery?
 
Day 3. No urges or relapse. I'm avoiding high-risk situations and I've identified potential triggers and put a plan in place to address my triggers. I'm continuing to learn about my porn addiction and how to plan for my recovery. Does anyone have any good experience with porn accountability software?
 
Apprezzo la risposta e la dimostrazione di supporto. Quando hai avuto una ricaduta, cosa pensi che l'abbia causato e quali azioni hai intrapreso per evitare di averne un altro? Inoltre, quali sono i tuoi pensieri sull'identificazione della causa principale della tua dipendenza? Ti affidi solo alla forza di volontà o hai un piano in atto durante il percorso di recupero?
Caro Mr. Red Pill, ho avuto una ricaduta quando: 1) ero solo in casa 2) Depresso 3) Incapace di affrontare le dure sfide della vita; lavoro, sentimenti, salute, famiglia 4) Incapace di essere consapevole di essere un tossicodipendente 5) Incapace di assumersi la piena responsabilità della mia malattia e del dolore causato a me e ai miei cari. Ad oggi non ho un piano o strategie particolari. Vivo alla giornata, evito ogni situazione che mi riporti sulla strada del PMO, ogni innesco, prego secondo la mia fede evito alcol, eccesso di zucchero e per quanto possibile con la mia salute, faccio sport, ma senza eccesso. Il flatline è un ottimo alleato.
 
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I relapsed for a few days straight after abstaining for a week. My feelings were different after these relapses. I didn't beat myself down because I knew that there was a good chance this would happen. In doing some reflection I uncovered some patterns. One is that I can not be on the phone or laptop after 9 pm. I have less impulse control when I'm tired. During those few days, I didn't take any time to continue learning about my porn addiction and practice my morning routine or evening routine. I wasn't mindful of my thoughts. Yesterday I picked myself back up and I'm back on the journey. I'm good. I know I must get back up. I know that I can overcome this addiction but it's going to take time. I must be compassionate with myself and not give up hope.
 

JerryTX

Active Member
I relapsed for a few days straight after abstaining for a week. My feelings were different after these relapses. I didn't beat myself down because I knew that there was a good chance this would happen. In doing some reflection I uncovered some patterns. One is that I can not be on the phone or laptop after 9 pm. I have less impulse control when I'm tired. During those few days, I didn't take any time to continue learning about my porn addiction and practice my morning routine or evening routine. I wasn't mindful of my thoughts. Yesterday I picked myself back up and I'm back on the journey. I'm good. I know I must get back up. I know that I can overcome this addiction but it's going to take time. I must be compassionate with myself and not give up hope.
Hang in there and you will continue to see the changes. Utilize resources on this site and in journals to assist. Stay strong!
 
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