Weekend warrior

[Noah]

Agree 1000% with the above comments. Part of the reason they are closed off is because guys like us are constantly trying to fuck them. Stay positive, don't take it personally if a babe doesn't want to talk to you, and keep your heart and mind open. Easier said that done, I know, but it worked for me.

 

[otanerferguson]

Have you experienced porn-induced erectile dysfunction? I wish like A Christmas Tale, the ghost of masturbations future could show you what it feels like. That's the end of the road if you continue masturbating to porn, and I don't wish it even on my worst enemy. If I could have shown myself that, twenty years ago, I would have dropped porn back then and never looked back. I hope that thought alone is enough to nudge you to not do it anymore. It takes a lot of time and effort to get fixed. You're better off not getting to that stage.

Luckily, you have the opportunity of learning from our mistakes.

As an aside benefit, holding it in drives you to spread it and it might give you more confidence to go after ladies in non-creepy ways. Just talk to women with no agenda, talk to a lot of them, joke around, trade stories. Just by sheer probability, one of them will end up in your bed. Good luck my friend!

 

[BillyB]

Hey it is Billy.

I have not been sleeping well at night I wake up early, and wake up multiple times throughout the night. It’s been around 18 days without any caffeine or P.

Is the sleeping disturbance normal?

 

[guitar1968]

Hey it is Billy.

I have not been sleeping well at night I wake up early, and wake up multiple times throughout the night. It’s been around 18 days without any caffeine or P.

Is the sleeping disturbance normal?

You are trying to quit to very hard addictions at the same time. I would yes, it's very normal. It will suck, but you are on the right path for sure. I've always heard that it isn't a good idea to try to change too many habits at once. It sets you up for failure. But you have made it 18 days. I'm guessing things will start to settle down. I'm doing well with porn, but man, don't take my coffee away. I'm not ready to drop that addiction yet.

 

[BillyB]

Try doing a study of people who drink coffee and see if they succumb to watching P more often than people who avoid coffee or just all caffeinated products in general.

My guess is that the non caffeinated people watch P less often. Just do not tell that to Starbucks and all of the scientists who publish information about the health benefits of drinking coffee every day.

My hypothesis could be wrong. It is just a wild guess.

 

[guitar1968]

Try doing a study of people who drink coffee and see if they succumb to watching P more often than people who avoid coffee or just all caffeinated products in general.

My guess is that the non caffeinated people watch P less often. Just do not tell that to Starbucks and all of the scientists who publish information about the health benefits of drinking coffee every day.

My hypothesis could be wrong. It is just a wild guess.

Interesting. I don't know. So many drink coffee, so many watch porn. It would be an interesting study. Maybe the caffeine is helping me. I lean harder into that addiction and stay away from the other. Hard to really know. But, I'm doing very well with the porn. Maybe in a little while I'll start backing off the caffeine as well. Maybe decaf isn't so bad!

 

[BillyB]

I still struggle filling my weekends with things to do. We have a long weekend ahead and I have nobody to hang out with. No friends really and no girlfriend.

I have various avenues to meet people in groups like church and a few other places but even church it’s hard to connect, and I am sort of an outgoing person, just often left out it seems.

Weekends are boring and it’s not that I am a boring person but I’m just tired of going out solo.

How can I fill up my weekends and my life with things that will aid in forging new friendships?

Thanks

 

[guitar1968]

I still struggle filling my weekends with things to do. We have a long weekend ahead and I have nobody to hang out with. No friends really and no girlfriend.

I have various avenues to meet people in groups like church and a few other places but even church it’s hard to connect, and I am sort of an outgoing person, just often left out it seems.

Weekends are boring and it’s not that I am a boring person but I’m just tired of going out solo.

How can I fill up my weekends and my life with things that will aid in forging new friendships?

Thanks

Sounds like you need to get involved in some groups with people who enjoy similar interests. If you are an outgoing person, there has to be something you can do to connect with people. I agree, just going out to bars or movies alone won't produce a lot of friendships, but there are so many clubs, groups, organizations that do all kinds of things with tons of people involved. Just get out and connect. Hopefully the ongoing pandemic won't keep you from finding things to do.

What do you like to do? I play music and getting together with other people, writing songs, performing helps me a great deal. Sometimes I think it's the only thing keeping me sane. And, it gives me social situations to be in all the time. I could do so much more but I'm already stretched thin with work and family.

Good luck. Put yourself out there. Connect with people who have similar interests. So much going on in the world. Take advantage of it.

 

[BillyB]

Hi everyone it is Billy. It is another weekend and this is awful. I have no partner and do not know how to meet people that want to stick around in my life. I run into so many dead ends trying to meet the right people I’m unsure what to do about it.

Why am I the only one lost with this?

Most women on the street alone never smile and they avoid everyone except their close friends.
Most groups I attend like to sequester and divide the males away from females.
Most people seem addicted to their phones and alcohol or pot. All relationships seem based from these addictions.

Maybe I am just too old to form friendships? I feel like the prime of my life but totally hopeless to live it with other people. It is like I am going to always be a total loner.

I go to 12 step meetings and it’s depressing. The people are so boring and uninspiring. It’s like they are all on anti depressants and missing a spark of life. They all look at me so dismally when I say I want to hang out and socialize and do things. I’m like what is wrong with you people, it is the weekend. There’s nothing wrong with wanting to go out to do things. I think these 12 step groups are best avoided

I plan to go to a couple church meetings this weekend alone and I will be the new person that nobody knows.

Maybe I will find a Meetup group and go alone.

Should I start up my dating app again? It seems like the dating apps are only way to meet females anymore. They make meeting them in real life next to impossible? Can someone fill me in on this?
I think my issue with females on dating apps is that I cannot relate to the sheer volume of how many dates and lovers they meet. I can’t compete with her dozens of men in her line up. I am not inexperienced with women but these babes have dated probably a thousand times more people than I ever did. It’s such an extreme imbalance, I cannot measure up to extreme daters or how easy it is for them to always have an intimate partner.

I have dry spells but no woman ever does. They only want ultra players who score tons of sex.

Life sucks having no friends. It’s like everyone I meet is a bore or they put in an effort to remain exclusive and selective with only the people they already know. They act anti-social yet they have pre-made social lives.

Such a bore. I want to enjoy life with other people but it’s like the world blocks my access from the people who can make this happen.

 

[BillyB]

I am back to day 0.

 

[Squidward81]

I am back to day 0.

Hey Billy!
Dude I'm sorry. I'm sorta there to with the friend situation. And then I go to PMO just to feel sorta good but as we both know, it doesn't really work.
I'm glad you are still journalling. We have all been there (here) and as I read about other people walking in more success than mistakes, I have to believe it's possible for me too.
We are here for you man!

 

[BillyB]

I am very hungover today from P. My whole weekend is shot. I will not go out and do much until I recover. It will take a couple days to recover.

 

[guitar1968]

Besides porn, what do you enjoy Billy? Are church and 12 step programs the only things you can think of? I can imagine that not all people going to 12 step programs are looking to go have fun. Maybe some, but they are there to deal with issues. There has to be something else that you could enjoy that other people are involved with. Not every woman is on dating apps screwing tons of men. Sure, some are, but there are tons of women out there looking for a decent person to share their lives with.

If it is the prime of your life, go out and make it that. Blaming everything on the state of the world, the state of dating and so on will only make you more miserable. Go find your own joy. It will spread and attract the right people to you. Get away from porn and go out and enjoy what the world has to offer.

 

[BillyB]

I know it can be tough trying to meet someone who cares about you and wants the same things as you. However, I would be careful thinking this way too much. Yes, certainly it's harder to meet the right person these days, but not everyone woman out there is this way. There are so many women just looking for the right relationship just like you. Be positive. Act strong and positive.

What you say is untrue in my case. The woman are ultra ultra priveledged and they make it impossible to meet them. They do everything they can to avoid looking at anyone they do not already know. That is the new normal. I do not have a friend group or a family to introduce me to females so it does not matter how well I look or talk or present myself, these woman have been programmed to hate men and avoid men at all costs.

The colleges taught all the females to hate and to destroy men. The only way to meet them is through friend groups and those take time, sometimes years to develop. I have no where near enough social capital to appease these monstrous women. And you know what, these colleges taught everyone in college to do the same things, not just the females but males and teachers, admins, probably even the janitor is there pushing the same anti male principles. The hate is not limited to women walking around coldly in designer yoga pants acting like men are all rapists and awful patriarchy has oppressed them while they walk to their graduate degree classes.

American woman have become supernaturally ratchet, while wearing perfect outfits that make them look attractive. How rotten is that? They are like hookers not for hire while advertising themselves as someone else.

So I need to find a female elsewhere. Not even to sleep with but just to be around females that were not programmed to be fridged, masculine, and hateful of men.

I am thinking of traveling to another country. Where?

I have thought of starting a new online dating account because that is the only way I can get dates anymore since they cannot be approached in real life. But I am not ready for all the supernatural volume of rejections to face online dating. And I am so tired of mediocre and diseased women with immense egos that were pumped sky high by all the attention they received from online dating addictions.

What happened to the females? They all act like men.

 

[BillyB]

Day 0 again.

 

[J01]

Hi Billy. As for your prior post, have you considered doing some volunteering? That is a good way to meet people in a normal and natural setting while at the same time being able to feel good about yourself by helping and serving others. Give it a try!

As for day 0 again, just keep going and concentrate on today and tomorrow.

 

[BillyB]

Day 0 again

 

[BillyB]

Hi Billy. As for your prior post, have you considered doing some volunteering? That is a good way to meet people in a normal and natural setting while at the same time being able to feel good about yourself by helping and serving others. Give it a try!

As for day 0 again, just keep going and concentrate on today and tomorrow.

Because I should not have to volunteer just to communicate with women or anyone for that matter.

Why am I the only one who notices how completely awful it is meeting people off-line anymore?

You can’t say hi to women in public. You may go to jail for saying hi to one.

You cannot date women at work because of MeToo and hyper sexual harassment claims or even outright lies.

I opened a new online dating account. Why am I the only one who notices this ultra extreme imbalance between males and females online? It’s like the only way to meet a female anymore is to be completely beta and begging for female attention through a phone. It’s sickening. It’s also seriously time consuming. Online dating is like a never ending job interview and some weeks you fail 30-60 interviews, and they don’t call back. It’s just imbalanced to such an extreme.

Women today are disgusting. They walk around like they think they are famous or super important. Dressing flashy and like they are famous on something so untouchable. It’s pathetic. American women are nothing but trash today.

How am I supposed to meet people ?

The people in my apartment complex go out of their way to not communicate with other tenants.

My job is working from home.

What’s up?