I confessed to my wife today about my recent slip up and although I’m ultimately glad I did it was an emotional tour de force. We talked a lot about how in the past I would use porn and fantasy to help me achieve climax even during sex with my now wife but girlfriend at the time. She felt used and betrayed and still has trouble trusting me to this day because of it. In the past I could get defensive about this or avoid confessing to her in order to avoid the inevitable emotional roller coaster. She recognizes my progress however, and I guess I was a little surprised by her reaction. I guess I expected her to be less emotional, which isn’t fair to her because that’s what I wanted. It’s good for me really, because it reminds me of the consequences of my actions; that even though it felt like a small slip for me it still has a deep emotional reaction to her and I have to respect that. This should be my biggest motivation. Even though I can make progress the smallest slip up has dire consequences to my marriage. It isn’t just me battling this addiction alone, she is there with me, emotionally invested as well and if I don’t straighten up she won’t be.