I'm 35 y.o. and went from zero libido
to a real woman with PIED and no morning woods or random erections, back to be as horny as I was when teenager
. In 'only' 200 days.
I hope my story might help and inspire some of you.
[WARNING TRIGGER LANGUAGE]
I was very disciplined
on my journey and informed myself as well as possible every day.
It was probably the 200 most healthy days of my adult life. Lots of sports (I mean a LOT), healthy food, consistent sleep, no electronics one hour before sleeping, reduced phone time, supplements, enough outdoor time every day, meditation etc.
I understand this process in two phases: reboot, and rewire
On the first 71 days I had no M, no O, nothing. It was the worst phase. Dead penis, mood swings, no dreams, almost no MW etc
. But it was very important, that was the real reboot. Then I had successful sex with O, which felt like resetting my counter. It led me to another long flatline. It was the first attempt to rewire with a real woman but seems like my brain wasn't ready yet. With patience, I continued the journey, and after another 60 to 70 days I started to have successful sex (firstly without O and later with O) and feel healed.
Now I feel like I've felt during my 20's. Horny, charming, healthy, and able to perform as many times I want - any time, with any woman
You can read my very detailed journal here
Here a resume:
Day 0: Christmas, 3 times PMO on that day already with a 50% erection. Last time I've watched porn.
Days 1 to 7: increasing productivity, zero libido
Days 8 to 10: first heavy flatline, weakness, zero libido
, feeling tired etc;
Day 11 to 25: increasing productivity, still zero libido
, but were good days; on the day 13 i had blue balls, it hurt hard;
Day 26: for the first time in months I got an erection only by fantasizing during a shower - no touching, only thoughts. Felt like an improvement;
Day 27 to 59: endless flatline
. Dead penis, sometimes it looked like my penis would hide inside of me if he could, looked like a mini worm, very scary;
Day 60: still no morning wood
, but for the first time in years I've felt a healthy attraction for my wife. She took a shower and came out naked; I admired her body as for a long time I didn't.
Day 61 to 63: slowly got some progress; very motivated for sports as well, lifting hard weights and feeling very 'manly' and self-confident.
Day 66: almost had a wet dream. I woke up very horny
, it felt like I could have sex with any woman on earth. It felt awesome, it's how I used to feel before losing my libido to porn.
Day 67 to 70: more frequent sex thoughts, feeling hornier in general. Getting erections easily
while on the sofa watching tv shows with my wife.
Day 71: first sex with my wife
since my reboot and it was awesome! I was extremely horny and relaxed, we had great foreplay and at least 20 mins sex. Orgasm was one of the best of my life!
Day 72: I woke up with strong morning wood, and thought I was cured. But I was wrong...
Day 73 to 95: flatline! No libido
, no real attraction or will to nothing sex related.. feeling like day 1.
Day 96: we were on the sofa, I was softly touching myself, got a 70% erection. She gave me a bj, and I O'ed still with a half erection. Wasn't good. One hour later I had another erection stronger though, but did nothing with it.
Day 97 to 100: flatline..
here I was getting impatient and was every day slowly touching myself, to see if there was some improvement..
Day 101: On this day for the first time in my journey I fapped two times
(no porn, only fantasy/thoughts).
Day 102 - 112: flatline
. I have some 50% morning wood and some small libido in the early morning. But during the day no sex thoughts and don't find any woman attractive.
Day 112 - 175: lots of ups and downs
, even some depression. Often zero libido, sometimes MW sometimes not..
Day 176: sucessful sex without O
! It was crucial to don't O here. Sex was amazing.
Day 177 - 183: getting better. Feeling charged
after the sex without O.
Day 184: Lots of succesful sex
, for hours, even anal sex - rock hard erection. By the very end I allowed myself to O.
Day 185-199: Despite the O, there was no flatline. MW everyda
y, feeling recovered already.
Day 200: Again sex for hours, with O
. At some point I lost my erection, but it's normal when having much sex in the same night. Here I consider myself recovered.
Day 202: Had succesful sex again
, was super horny.
Here I stop counting/journaling. But today is day 244 and in the last weeks I had sex many times, it's just getting better and better. I'm horny all the time, and there are not even reminiscences of flatlines. Last Saturday was crazy, I O'ed four times (the girl O'ed more than me though). I can have sex in following days without any problem, like a teenager. Couldn't be happier!
My best tips to anyone in this journey:
If you ask me my 2 most important learnings/tips that can help anyone here, no matter the stage of your journey:
1. Before feeling healed, you'll have consistent MW 4-7 times per week, and before that you'll have consistent vivid dreams first. So your first aim should be conquering vivid dreams. The healing in the brain happens during your sleep, especially when you dream. Respect your nights as the most important time during this journey: turn off your phone two hours before sleep, and within days you'll feel an improvement on your dreams. That's the path that will lead you to conquer consistent MW, and rewire successfully later on.
2. Exercise hard, every day. That's the most effective thing you can do with your motivation to wake up your balls and put them to work. I recommend at least 200x pushups per day, and sprint runs (at least 4x 20 seconds each sprint). Jump squats are great, weightlifting too, but for me, sprints were game changer. When I sprint and sleep well, MW on next day is a sure thing.
And that's it. Thanks a lot to everyone in this community, it saved my life. Special thanks to @otanerferguson
, and to everyone who commented on my journal.