OathKeeper
Member
Story:
First of all I don't know where to begin y'all! I have been pmo'ing for as long as I can remember from masturbating in the high school stalls numerous times a day; to cope with the bullying and absent social life. Eventually when I left for college it was a chance for a new life and a new beginning. I was able to achieve 30 days and the benefits were Immense. I was able to finally break my virginity and I had somewhat of a social life. Life was finally worth living for, I had the motivation to start bodybuilding and even start my own business. UNTIL everything fell apart, and I feel in love with a girl that did not love me.It broke my heart and sent me back to PMO this time I would never see 30 days again (been 3 years since) my addiction has only progressed and I started watching weirder and weirder genres of porn. I found myself in isolation and no friends I developed anxiety and panic attacks for the first time in my life. They were so bad that I had to drop out for the semester. I am now on my final semester of college and watched the years fly by one after the other while still in the darkness of the addiction. I was never able to get a girlfriend or even a hookup despite being told I am a very attractive man. I don't even have the confidence to talk to the girls that approach me! at the bars. It's a sad and miserable life! I live by myself and have no friends and don't know where to find any. I spend my days PMOing and binge watching tv shows. Every time i swear this will be the last time and fail it takes a serious effort to get past 3 days and if I ever reach 7 days it's a miracle. Im starting to lose hope. Ive tried everything I even joined a 12 step for 2 years called SAA and i still wasnt able to get sober. I am scared of what life will look like after im done with university this upcoming winter! Will I still be lonely? Will I still be PMOing ? Will I still be living the miserable hopeless life? IT SCARES ME!!! I JUST WANT TO STOP PMOING
Symptoms/consequnces:
-I've never had trouble with ED, exactly the opposite I get random boners all the time its very embarrassing I get them just by talking to a girl. However I have trouble orgasming during sex, infact the girls think im gay or they are not attractive enough for me! It ruins everything.
-I have severe social anxiety
- I have severe anxiety, panic attacks, depression from PMO
- Im starting to bald
- Have no friends and very very lonely
- I can't talk to girls despite being told im very attractive
- So much more bad symptoms but I can't even thing of them thats how bad my brain fog is
I NEED TO TRY SOMETHING NEW!! I just feel like ive been going in circles for 8 yrs now
For that I will be journaling every day! My goal is to stop PMO completely! I am open to all advice and suggestions
First of all I don't know where to begin y'all! I have been pmo'ing for as long as I can remember from masturbating in the high school stalls numerous times a day; to cope with the bullying and absent social life. Eventually when I left for college it was a chance for a new life and a new beginning. I was able to achieve 30 days and the benefits were Immense. I was able to finally break my virginity and I had somewhat of a social life. Life was finally worth living for, I had the motivation to start bodybuilding and even start my own business. UNTIL everything fell apart, and I feel in love with a girl that did not love me.It broke my heart and sent me back to PMO this time I would never see 30 days again (been 3 years since) my addiction has only progressed and I started watching weirder and weirder genres of porn. I found myself in isolation and no friends I developed anxiety and panic attacks for the first time in my life. They were so bad that I had to drop out for the semester. I am now on my final semester of college and watched the years fly by one after the other while still in the darkness of the addiction. I was never able to get a girlfriend or even a hookup despite being told I am a very attractive man. I don't even have the confidence to talk to the girls that approach me! at the bars. It's a sad and miserable life! I live by myself and have no friends and don't know where to find any. I spend my days PMOing and binge watching tv shows. Every time i swear this will be the last time and fail it takes a serious effort to get past 3 days and if I ever reach 7 days it's a miracle. Im starting to lose hope. Ive tried everything I even joined a 12 step for 2 years called SAA and i still wasnt able to get sober. I am scared of what life will look like after im done with university this upcoming winter! Will I still be lonely? Will I still be PMOing ? Will I still be living the miserable hopeless life? IT SCARES ME!!! I JUST WANT TO STOP PMOING
Symptoms/consequnces:
-I've never had trouble with ED, exactly the opposite I get random boners all the time its very embarrassing I get them just by talking to a girl. However I have trouble orgasming during sex, infact the girls think im gay or they are not attractive enough for me! It ruins everything.
-I have severe social anxiety
- I have severe anxiety, panic attacks, depression from PMO
- Im starting to bald
- Have no friends and very very lonely
- I can't talk to girls despite being told im very attractive
- So much more bad symptoms but I can't even thing of them thats how bad my brain fog is
I NEED TO TRY SOMETHING NEW!! I just feel like ive been going in circles for 8 yrs now
For that I will be journaling every day! My goal is to stop PMO completely! I am open to all advice and suggestions
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