My Reboot story 7 month mark

Hi to all,

Im a little nervous posting on this forum. I dont really post anything on the internet and I rarely do even with social media. Just goes to show that this is a real thing if someone like me has to post stuff on the internet to get help.

The first time I ever had sex was when I was 18 and did experience some PIED I was able to have sex but it wasn't really that good. I had anther girlfriend when I was 21 and also experienced PIED with her. I was able to have sex with her but it was difficult. The first time I ever watched porn was when I was about maybe 14 and i'm 26 now. I pretty much PMO'd every day for about 10+ years. I started to get into really weird fetishes that people wouldn't even consider porn anymore to keep my arousal. Nothing illegal though. I started over time to lose my erection to porn Ming with a 60%-70% erection for maybe a few years. I got a girlfriend last year and we have been dating for a while. I did have some successful sex with her but had problems in the beginning then I relapsed to M only and had issues. I have no urge to watch porn at all since I discovered my issue or M.

Before my current girlfriend I watched porn everyday and never had sex for five years in-between girlfriends. I am very successful in business and used PMO as a stress reliever never really interested in girls because i always had porn. I see my girlfriend once every two months because she temporarily lives in CA and im in NY. I have failed with her on multiple occasions and she is being patient with me. So far I have been PMO free for 6-7 months but I have O'ed twice with my girlfriend in that period trying to have sex with her. I have also developed PE badly. I cum before even trying to enter with an 70-80% erection trying to go in. She wants it to be 100% erection before sex. When I have attempted to have sex with her it was in month number five and I failed again. I will see her at the end of the month and will be Seven months without M or P. i could see how I am a longer case because I started young and became desensitized to porn over time. The 90 day reboot is only for people that have mild PIED. For people that grew up on this with a 10 plus year addiction my guess is between 6-12 months of no P or M for recovery but thats my guess. I will see her soon to find out if I will be able to have sex.

I went to a urologist in the past and said that everything was fine with me.

1) I do have morning wood 100% just about every day now which has been going on for at least three months.
2) Ive had about 5 wet dreams when I dream about having sex
3) Ive been in what feeling like an asexual flatline up until recently for the first 5-6 months. Now feel really horny lately and think about my girlfriends body a lot and get arousal when I just want to have sex with her.
4) Im able to hold my girlfriend and cuddle with her and get a decent erection but doesn't last long. Even holding her hand I once got an decent erection. ( at month 5)

I emailed Noah Church and he's a Great guy! Very support and explained to me that my condition could take longer than 5 months to heal. I emailed him at month five and he said that my PA could be a contributing factor which he is probably right.

Last time I tried to have sex with her at month 5 I failed but I also felt lots of anxiety and could feel my heart racing because of my past failures. Any comments or questions I will answer in this thread. Thanks!
 

96LostWanderer

Active Member
Congratulations on making it 7 months without porn. Sounds like you’ve got a great girlfriend, keep your relationship with her in mind as motivation to carry on down this good path.
 

Fappy

Respected Member
you probably just need more time. youve gone 7 months without PMO so youre obviously doing it right, dont be stressed over it. different people, different recovery times.
 
@Fappy @96LostWanderer
Thank you both for the support! I will be seeing her next week so i'm a little nervous about that but I hope for the best. 7 months no PMO ill be at. Not doing M and P is easy at this point. Fappy I read a lot of your comments on rebootnation and you have really good advice and support! Im a fan. I want to be able to be healed from this and be able to post a success story so people know that there is a light at the end of the tunnel for people that started on porn.
 
Update:

Tried to have sex with my girlfriend yesterday and failed after being away from P and M for 7 months now. Last month I felt like I was out of the flatline now I feel like im back in and asexual again. I could lose my relationship over this I haven't had sex with her in seven months!! I have no urge for sex or anything. I woke up yesterday for the first time in a while without morning wood thats when I feel like my asexual flatline hit me. I need some advice. I visit her once every two months. Im still with her for about a week then I see her for another week on New Years eve. This si really embarrassing every other guy is easily able to have sex by now but i cant... WTF.
 

96LostWanderer

Active Member
Maybe explain to her that you’ve got difficulty performing but it’s not a reflection on how attractive she is, just a reflection on your own flatline. If you’re considerate and she’s understanding hopefully it will be an issue you can work through.
 
I did explain this to her and she is understanding and knows that I didn't intentionally have this ED problem. She says she knows that its not about her body image and knows that its about this horrible habit that I've had and currently recovering from. She still loves me and says our relationship is perfect except for the part where we cant be intimate and she says she feels like we are almost like friends in that aspect because of the no sex. Im doing everything I can to have a heathy sex life I just wanna recover. I knew I was probably going to be a long rebooter because of that fact that I was masterbating to porn for the last few years with a 60-70% erection and had some really weird fetishes at the end. Ive used PMO for over 10 years.
 
Update:

Lately I've been feeling super asexual lately and have had no morning wood the past 2-3 days. I not concerned about this though. I think I've discovered that its important in my reboot to not orgasm at all even with a partner to give myself time to heal. I orgasmed two months ago attempting to have sex and the orgasm felt horrible. I will see my girlfriend in about two months from now so that gives me a total of four months from orgasm. Hopefully this is what will help me get over the PIED. I watched a movie with my friend last night that had a few sex scenes but i wasn't even turned on at all in the slightest. It was like I wasn't even looking at sex it was boring kinda. Just thought I would give an update for the week.
 
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