quitforeverthenwin2
Well-Known Member
Hey guys a sort of quick - albeit critical post.
I left this forum for some time and really deepened my recovery.
It's been over 5 yrs without mo'ing to porn. And about a year without any glances at porn. No mo in some time. Successful sex and much of what I dreamed of when I first came here.
But there is more work I'd like to do. Continued improvement.
I see the majority of threads here people lapsing constantly and using language like "it happened" - the wording is constantly like this is something that can't be controlled.
I had tried 12 step and hearing over and over " you are powerless" did not work.
I came here and we used to have a good community - that helped.
Finally I committed to working through SMART recovery - a science based program. I was exposed to many people who actually take beating addiction seriously. Who put in work, who used systems. People who would die if they had another drink. The no fap community - does not have the culture of successfully beating addiction. It's about counting impermanent streaks - lapsing and connecting over the struggle.
Anyways - part of me wants to help the culture here but 1st of all I notice when I have advised people to try other then what they are trying - it's basically ignored.
And secondly - this forum I find it actually makes my own recovery feel less solid ( I am well equipped with tools to handle this however) attitudes of things happening, of it being impossible, of lapses are contagious. You can see it right here in the posts - everyone in the same place together at the bottom of the barrel watching porn every few days and being upset about it.
Anyways - I plan to continue to succeed and don't want to be exposed to this so I won't be back. I advise those serious about recovery 1) This is possible 2) It is your responsibility 3) Leave this losing environment and seek out success - it really can be done.
I left this forum for some time and really deepened my recovery.
It's been over 5 yrs without mo'ing to porn. And about a year without any glances at porn. No mo in some time. Successful sex and much of what I dreamed of when I first came here.
But there is more work I'd like to do. Continued improvement.
I see the majority of threads here people lapsing constantly and using language like "it happened" - the wording is constantly like this is something that can't be controlled.
I had tried 12 step and hearing over and over " you are powerless" did not work.
I came here and we used to have a good community - that helped.
Finally I committed to working through SMART recovery - a science based program. I was exposed to many people who actually take beating addiction seriously. Who put in work, who used systems. People who would die if they had another drink. The no fap community - does not have the culture of successfully beating addiction. It's about counting impermanent streaks - lapsing and connecting over the struggle.
Anyways - part of me wants to help the culture here but 1st of all I notice when I have advised people to try other then what they are trying - it's basically ignored.
And secondly - this forum I find it actually makes my own recovery feel less solid ( I am well equipped with tools to handle this however) attitudes of things happening, of it being impossible, of lapses are contagious. You can see it right here in the posts - everyone in the same place together at the bottom of the barrel watching porn every few days and being upset about it.
Anyways - I plan to continue to succeed and don't want to be exposed to this so I won't be back. I advise those serious about recovery 1) This is possible 2) It is your responsibility 3) Leave this losing environment and seek out success - it really can be done.