33 year-old PIED, 57 days no PMO updates

Ayahuasca

Member
Who I am
  • 33-year-old American male
  • Started PMO age 11
  • Used high-speed internet P daily for over 2 decades, almost never missed a day
  • Escalated to non-traditional P from a young age
  • PIED difficulty with women and sometimes even with P, since age 20, doctors were no help
  • Viagra, Cialis, Levitra all barely worked, once even 100 mg sildenafil didn't help me get up for my ex-partner
  • Don't think I had more than a few episodes of morning wood from ages 20-33, until the reboot started
  • It may be relevant to note: I had Peyronie's disease surgery (plication) at age 15, to successfully fix a downward curvature
Reboot Status
  • Significantly more energy, better mood, more focus when working on tasks
  • Flat-line weeks 2-4, then normalized for a week, then again for a week, at this moment I'm good and not worried
  • I see girls everywhere as wonderfully beautiful, enchanting, mesmerizing creatures. Something I haven't felt since I was young
  • Morning woods came back in spurts, I'd get soft MW's for a few days in a row around week 4, and they are becoming more frequent. This morning I awoke with a RAGER, it made me happy because it reinforces the progress I've made
  • Deeply attracted by this girl I see casually, I saw her yesterday and I was just transfixed and admiring her, and got hard literally just flirting and seeing that look in her eyes
What's next
  • I am 100% sure this is working for me in many ways, and I am so unbelievably excited and happy that I found a solution for potentially one of the greatest nightmares of my life. I hope I continue to heal. I'll post another update at the 90 day mark, but I plan to continue indefinitely. I'm done with P, it's an addictive disease and unnatural, it makes me weak, it's an illusory substitute without substance, and I am disgusted by it but grateful for the lesson I received from years of abusing it. I'm not on a "streak", I am on day 57 of the rest of my life.
Happy to answer any questions :).
 

AG2161

Member
Firstly, congratulations on the massive achievement, it's really pleasing to see success stories like yours.
Have a couple of questions, given my experience is quite similar to yours:
For someone with around 2 decades of PMO I feel you've achieved success in quite a short span, I'm currently in 27th day of total abstinence from PMO, I haven't really seen much improvements in my erections as such, apart from a couple of wet dreams and general improvement in my overall mood and livelihood. Would like to know what additional efforts you put in apart from stopping PMO. How did you tackle your thoughts etc...
 

Ayahuasca

Member
Firstly, congratulations on the massive achievement, it's really pleasing to see success stories like yours.
Have a couple of questions, given my experience is quite similar to yours:
For someone with around 2 decades of PMO I feel you've achieved success in quite a short span, I'm currently in 27th day of total abstinence from PMO, I haven't really seen much improvements in my erections as such, apart from a couple of wet dreams and general improvement in my overall mood and livelihood. Would like to know what additional efforts you put in apart from stopping PMO. How did you tackle your thoughts etc...

Hey AG2161, a couple of thoughts:

I do feel like I've achieved some success, but until I begin the process of rewiring (no timeline in my head to begin that, but sometime after 90 days). I'm still bouncing up-and-down with energy levels and general sexual arousal levels, but I hope this stabilizes with time. Still, I'm very grateful for how far I've come and the physical changes I've clearly observed can only be linked to this new lifestyle.

You mentioned tackling thoughts. I cannot recommend meditation strongly enough. I have been a daily meditator for close to 10 years now, after learning about the practice from a previous therapist. Meditation allows you to take a step back and observe your current thoughts and emotions dispassionately. This is deeply liberating.

When we recognize that that we're "feeling bad", which could be because we're angry, sad, shameful, regretful, or anything else, we can simply use the skill of meditation, wherever we are, to "tune into" our bodies. When I do this, it let's me see where I really am and helps me understand that these so-called negative emotions are nothing more than energy flowing through the body, energy to which I've assigned arbitrary labels like "good" or "bad". It's all the difference in the world to know that and to see it. It converts anxiety to excitement and productivity, anger into right action, and so much more.

To start meditation, I typically recommend an app like Headspace. My daily practice is twice a day, 15 minutes each session, mindfulness meditation wherein I (primarily) observe the breath.
 
Hi Bro!

It is nice to find guys at same age as i, 33 yo, and the same amont of years watching porn , more than 20 years, and simillar regullarity.

Now i'm at the best "shape" since a started the reboot at age 30.( yes more then 3 years strugling to stop the addiction).

  • Currently, I haven't watched porn at all for more than 3 and a half months ( it is my record so far).
  • In the last 2 months a just had masturbation 5 times. ( I experienced that cut off masturbation as much as possible, even without porn was really important for the healling .
  • And I've had sex with my GF for 13 times whiten the last 3 months with a really solids erection ( more solid then when a used to take ED pills).


Nice recovery to u bro!
 

Ayahuasca

Member
Hi Bro!

It is nice to find guys at same age as i, 33 yo, and the same amont of years watching porn , more than 20 years, and simillar regullarity.

Now i'm at the best "shape" since a started the reboot at age 30.( yes more then 3 years strugling to stop the addiction).

  • Currently, I haven't watched porn at all for more than 3 and a half months ( it is my record so far).
  • In the last 2 months a just had masturbation 5 times. ( I experienced that cut off masturbation as much as possible, even without porn was really important for the healling .
  • And I've had sex with my GF for 13 times whiten the last 3 months with a really solids erection ( more solid then when a used to take ED pills).


Nice recovery to u bro!

That's amazing to hear, thanks for sharing man! Remember: this isn't a streak, porn is in the past. There is no option to go back. Good luck brother!
 

Gindia

New Member
Who I am
  • 33-year-old American male
  • Started PMO age 11
  • Used high-speed internet P daily for over 2 decades, almost never missed a day
  • Escalated to non-traditional P from a young age
  • PIED difficulty with women and sometimes even with P, since age 20, doctors were no help
  • Viagra, Cialis, Levitra all barely worked, once even 100 mg sildenafil didn't help me get up for my ex-partner
  • Don't think I had more than a few episodes of morning wood from ages 20-33, until the reboot started
  • It may be relevant to note: I had Peyronie's disease surgery (plication) at age 15, to successfully fix a downward curvature
Reboot Status
  • Significantly more energy, better mood, more focus when working on tasks
  • Flat-line weeks 2-4, then normalized for a week, then again for a week, at this moment I'm good and not worried
  • I see girls everywhere as wonderfully beautiful, enchanting, mesmerizing creatures. Something I haven't felt since I was young
  • Morning woods came back in spurts, I'd get soft MW's for a few days in a row around week 4, and they are becoming more frequent. This morning I awoke with a RAGER, it made me happy because it reinforces the progress I've made
  • Deeply attracted by this girl I see casually, I saw her yesterday and I was just transfixed and admiring her, and got hard literally just flirting and seeing that look in her eyes
What's next
  • I am 100% sure this is working for me in many ways, and I am so unbelievably excited and happy that I found a solution for potentially one of the greatest nightmares of my life. I hope I continue to heal. I'll post another update at the 90 day mark, but I plan to continue indefinitely. I'm done with P, it's an addictive disease and unnatural, it makes me weak, it's an illusory substitute without substance, and I am disgusted by it but grateful for the lesson I received from years of abusing it. I'm not on a "streak", I am on day 57 of the rest of my life.
Happy to answer any questions :).
Congratulations.
Me on 28th day of reboot journey. NO. PMO since 28days. After 10days of journey I able to perform sex with my wife.during reboot normal sex with wife also we should avoid if able to perform?.
 

KevinN202

New Member
Who I am
  • 33-year-old American male
  • Started PMO age 11
  • Used high-speed internet P daily for over 2 decades, almost never missed a day
  • Escalated to non-traditional P from a young age
  • PIED difficulty with women and sometimes even with P, since age 20, doctors were no help
  • Viagra, Cialis, Levitra all barely worked, once even 100 mg sildenafil didn't help me get up for my ex-partner
  • Don't think I had more than a few episodes of morning wood from ages 20-33, until the reboot started
  • It may be relevant to note: I had Peyronie's disease surgery (plication) at age 15, to successfully fix a downward curvature
Reboot Status
  • Significantly more energy, better mood, more focus when working on tasks
  • Flat-line weeks 2-4, then normalized for a week, then again for a week, at this moment I'm good and not worried
  • I see girls everywhere as wonderfully beautiful, enchanting, mesmerizing creatures. Something I haven't felt since I was young
  • Morning woods came back in spurts, I'd get soft MW's for a few days in a row around week 4, and they are becoming more frequent. This morning I awoke with a RAGER, it made me happy because it reinforces the progress I've made
  • Deeply attracted by this girl I see casually, I saw her yesterday and I was just transfixed and admiring her, and got hard literally just flirting and seeing that look in her eyes
What's next
  • I am 100% sure this is working for me in many ways, and I am so unbelievably excited and happy that I found a solution for potentially one of the greatest nightmares of my life. I hope I continue to heal. I'll post another update at the 90 day mark, but I plan to continue indefinitely. I'm done with P, it's an addictive disease and unnatural, it makes me weak, it's an illusory substitute without substance, and I am disgusted by it but grateful for the lesson I received from years of abusing it. I'm not on a "streak", I am on day 57 of the rest of my life.
Happy to answer any questions :).
first success story I ever read on this site, THIS IS SO EXCITING TO SEE YOUR PROGRESS! LOVE THE ATTITUDE BROTHA!! also, I don't want to set you up for failure, but i've gone 45 days and fell. then I went 6 months and fell. I know another podcast guy (on The Porn Reboot Podcast) who went 18 months before he went on a lifetime run without porn. What I learned was that, failing is totally okay, as long as we don't accept it as a resting point. Urges never go away, which is why this author recommended that folks should have a sexual life (if you're ready for it... i am not currently).

I love the insights man!
 

Tryinghere

Active Member
Who I am
  • 33-year-old American male
  • Started PMO age 11
  • Used high-speed internet P daily for over 2 decades, almost never missed a day
  • Escalated to non-traditional P from a young age
  • PIED difficulty with women and sometimes even with P, since age 20, doctors were no help
  • Viagra, Cialis, Levitra all barely worked, once even 100 mg sildenafil didn't help me get up for my ex-partner
  • Don't think I had more than a few episodes of morning wood from ages 20-33, until the reboot started
  • It may be relevant to note: I had Peyronie's disease surgery (plication) at age 15, to successfully fix a downward curvature
Reboot Status
  • Significantly more energy, better mood, more focus when working on tasks
  • Flat-line weeks 2-4, then normalized for a week, then again for a week, at this moment I'm good and not worried
  • I see girls everywhere as wonderfully beautiful, enchanting, mesmerizing creatures. Something I haven't felt since I was young
  • Morning woods came back in spurts, I'd get soft MW's for a few days in a row around week 4, and they are becoming more frequent. This morning I awoke with a RAGER, it made me happy because it reinforces the progress I've made
  • Deeply attracted by this girl I see casually, I saw her yesterday and I was just transfixed and admiring her, and got hard literally just flirting and seeing that look in her eyes
What's next
  • I am 100% sure this is working for me in many ways, and I am so unbelievably excited and happy that I found a solution for potentially one of the greatest nightmares of my life. I hope I continue to heal. I'll post another update at the 90 day mark, but I plan to continue indefinitely. I'm done with P, it's an addictive disease and unnatural, it makes me weak, it's an illusory substitute without substance, and I am disgusted by it but grateful for the lesson I received from years of abusing it. I'm not on a "streak", I am on day 57 of the rest of my life.
Happy to answer any questions :).
Great success man! We're close to the same amount of time in. At what point did you stop worrying so much about PIED? I'm at close to 90 days and HAVE had successful sex a handful of times....the last time my wife and I tried (last week), nothing. Just a dead dick. Did you experience ups and downs as far as that goes?
 

Ayahuasca

Member
Great success man! We're close to the same amount of time in. At what point did you stop worrying so much about PIED? I'm at close to 90 days and HAVE had successful sex a handful of times....the last time my wife and I tried (last week), nothing. Just a dead dick. Did you experience ups and downs as far as that goes?

I don't currently have a regular partner, but there are a couple girls I have a history with and we occassionally hook up.

I had successful sex for the first time around day ~70, then again the next day. I did notice a brief flatline after the two orgasms since I had been completely without orgasm during my streak. I'm currently on day 95 and feeling hornier than ever, but have not had the opportunity to test the equipment. But I feel much more confident because of the morning woods and because of how much I feel genuinely aroused and attracted to women I see. I've been talking to women more and just this morning joined a dating site :)

To answer your question directly: I still partially worry about PIED in the back of my mind because of many instances of failing with women in my 20s, and because I had convinced myself that it was permanent and that I'd have to have some kind of surgical implant to maintain an erection (I had even researched different implant types, costs, and doctors). But I noticed when I had sex on day ~70 that I didn't really worry because, honestly, I was just too damn horny. It helps because I have known the girl for a very long time and, even though we are not in a committed relationship, I trust her and feel comfortable with her. I have failed with her in the past, before, and she knows about my new NoFap lifestyle.

Hope that helps, more than happy to dive into anything else!
 

Ayahuasca

Member
PS: I had a wet dream (for the first time since I was a kid) around day 60, a few days after my original post. I didn't even have a sexy dream, just woke up and felt my sheets and boxers. I haven't had one since. Not sure if it had any effects, I did not notice a flatline afterwards as some have reported.
 

Tryinghere

Active Member
I'm happy to hear that man. I'm at the point now where I get MW fairly regularly and a random here and there but mostly I'm just shirvelled and small and rubbery. Irritable and pissed off usually too. This is a stupid problem to have. I think we went to hard too early an now I'm kind of jacked up because of it.
 

Ayahuasca

Member
I'm happy to hear that man. I'm at the point now where I get MW fairly regularly and a random here and there but mostly I'm just shirvelled and small and rubbery. Irritable and pissed off usually too. This is a stupid problem to have. I think we went to hard too early an now I'm kind of jacked up because of it.

I think random erections throughout the day aren't something I'm looking for or expecting. Even if I take a large dose of Viagra, nothing happens until physical contact starts. Morning woods coming back are a stronger sign, I feel.

We definitely went too hard early, but I've read many accounts about older guys or guys with more extreme viewing habits than us who achieved (or are achieving) recovery. Have faith, trust the process. As for irritability, that seems common for quitting any addiction. I'm on day 3 of no weed and I was angry upon waking up even, for no good reason. That's life, it'll pass, hopefully soon.
 

Tryinghere

Active Member
That’s what has me so worried right now! I’ve read (in many locations) that older guys typically have a faster recovery because we have real live sexual experiences. My wife and I had an amazing sex life up until about 5 years ago. I showed no sexual side effects until 2019. It took me until sept 20, 2021 to realize that porn was what was causing my problems and I haven’t went near the shit since. I’ve masturbated maybe 7 times (to sensation only) since sept 20. We’ve done plenty of “rewriting” activities. Aside from a one week span, i don’t feel anymore confident in my ability to become aroused then I did on day #1.
im old
I have lots of experience to fall back on
Zero porn
Very little MO (hard mode for about a month now)
Lots of rewiring

Im frustrated because I thought I’d see some tangible results. My goal was to be able to freely fuck my wife by Christmas. Here we are a few days away and I’m afraid to even try.
 

Ayahuasca

Member
That’s what has me so worried right now! I’ve read (in many locations) that older guys typically have a faster recovery because we have real live sexual experiences. My wife and I had an amazing sex life up until about 5 years ago. I showed no sexual side effects until 2019. It took me until sept 20, 2021 to realize that porn was what was causing my problems and I haven’t went near the shit since. I’ve masturbated maybe 7 times (to sensation only) since sept 20. We’ve done plenty of “rewriting” activities. Aside from a one week span, i don’t feel anymore confident in my ability to become aroused then I did on day #1.
im old
I have lots of experience to fall back on
Zero porn
Very little MO (hard mode for about a month now)
Lots of rewiring

Im frustrated because I thought I’d see some tangible results. My goal was to be able to freely fuck my wife by Christmas. Here we are a few days away and I’m afraid to even try.

I'm with you, man. A lot of what you said resonates with me. I spent more than a decade, supposedly the best decade of your life sexually, my 20s, being afraid to meet women and have sex because of awful failures in the past. It damaged my perception of myself, of love, of intimacy, and so much more. I went to doctors and explicitly asked them

1. Should I change my diet?
2. Could it be related to not enough exercise?
3. Should I limit porn or masturbation?

To all these questions, urologists replied "nah, it's just all biological since you're not getting morning woods". I remember the depression that hit me after one urologist told me that if pills don't work, my only other hope is implant surgery, but that he would not recommend it until I'm at least 40 due to it only lasting about 10 years and permanently removing my natural biological potential for an erection.

What's even more embarrassing is I thought that I had a low libido from not watching enough porn. Seriously. A few times before I'd go see a girl I would watch porn for like an hour, not even masturbate but just watch it to "get myself in the mood". I read accounts of guys masturbating for hours a day and felt envious of their drive.

One big takeaway is you can only trust yourself. Learn your body, experiment by quitting things, changing things, and seeing what happens. Doctors are humans just like you or I, they don't have all the answers. Also, meditation helps and literally saved my life. I would have killed myself at age 24 if I didn't discover mindfulness. I was planning it and researching it and more. It's amazing to look back at that version of myself now. Different life, it feels.
 

Tryinghere

Active Member
Dude. I'm glad you found mindfulness. My wife is a yoga teacher. I haven't really started a meditation practice, but I try to attend her relaxation and mindfulness class once a week. Everything you're saying is terrifying to me. I don't want an implant. I don't want a pill. I want to fuck my wife like a normal husband is supposed to do.

I get what you're saying about thinking watching porn enhances your sex drive. That's not too far off from how it feels. Too bad no one eer told us that this shit would fuck us up.

I just pray that by doing the things we're doing, we get back to normal. I won't be able to live like this indefinitely. There has to be an end.
 

Ayahuasca

Member
Dude. I'm glad you found mindfulness. My wife is a yoga teacher. I haven't really started a meditation practice, but I try to attend her relaxation and mindfulness class once a week. Everything you're saying is terrifying to me. I don't want an implant. I don't want a pill. I want to fuck my wife like a normal husband is supposed to do.

I get what you're saying about thinking watching porn enhances your sex drive. That's not too far off from how it feels. Too bad no one eer told us that this shit would fuck us up.

I just pray that by doing the things we're doing, we get back to normal. I won't be able to live like this indefinitely. There has to be an end.

Agree 100%. What keeps me going is that it's clear that I am living a more natural, God-intended life by abstaining from porn, especially the infinite novelty of high-speed hub sites. Even if I don't have the same potency as some stud guy who can have sex multiple times a day every day with his partner, it's still making ME more potent and maximizing my own sexuality. I continue to try to not compare myself to others or to any arbitrary standard of sex. I simply want a partner I can trust, who trusts me, and if I fail to go sometimes, which is inevitable, she can know that it's not her and that we can try again in an hour or day or week. I'm just working on minimizing the chances of failure, as much as my biology allows. Everything else is not in our hands.
 

Tryinghere

Active Member
Wise words. I'll be happy if I can get to a point where I stop worrying about whether or not I'll be able to get it up. If it happens occasionally then it happens. Right now there's a 90% chance it won't happen lol. I used to be quite good in bed I think....at least she thought I was.

Keep it up. I love your name by the way.
 
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