Changing for real this time


New Member
Hi, I am a 31 year old South African Indian male married. Some background to my porn addiction:

It started when I was still in high school. My cousin and I would stay up late to watch softporn on one of the TV channels which showed it. I think this is where I got used to hiding it as the TV was in our living room so you had to listen intently for anyone waking up. PMO has gotten much worse as the years progressed. Inevitably, I have been caught a few times by my partner while we were still dating, when we were engaged and now when we are married. I have tried to stop each time but have relapsed each and every time. I am really at this point causing our relationship to fail.

I am hoping that by sharing my story here, I will be able to stop using completely. I have been seeing a psychologist to try to get at the underlying issues but it has not helped stop me in regard to PMO. I think my issue stems from being unable to initiate contact with real people correctly and so I leave myself unfulfilled in my relationship with my wife. The trigger is basically being by myself. Looking to hold myself accountable starting today.