Up and down ED

Tryinghere

Active Member
Determination of a man is solid . Set in stone. No way in hell it is even an option to crawl back into the grim dungeon of porn sites!

... but ofcourse you want to! It's the fucking beast lurking in the corners of your mind! The devil who's grinning in the shadows! Sweet talking to you and trying to make you change your mind! But we are better than that! We have determination. We don't bow down to devil when there's an angel next to us :)

Edit: just wanted to say i'm no religious. I'm hardcore atheist lol
My religious beliefs vary with my chapter in life. but the devil is always the devil and shows up in many forms. That's true regardless of whether you call it the devil, the universe, karma or just plain temptation. and porn is the devil
 
Those who believe in God should not forget the old proverb " God helps those who help themselves".

Ultimately, whether you are religious or not, if you don't use your determination and will power to change the course of your life, no one else can do it for you.

I'm happy to see your confidence in holding yourself back from relapsing. That confidence suggests you have reached the next level in your reboot journey.

But as always, be aware and alert! Do not let your guard down.
 

Tryinghere

Active Member
Those who believe in God should not forget the old proverb " God helps those who help themselves".

Ultimately, whether you are religious or not, if you don't use your determination and will power to change the course of your life, no one else can do it for you.

I'm happy to see your confidence in holding yourself back from relapsing. That confidence suggests you have reached the next level in your reboot journey.

But as always, be aware and alert! Do not let your guard down. Thanks
Those who believe in God should not forget the old proverb " God helps those who help themselves".

Ultimately, whether you are religious or not, if you don't use your determination and will power to change the course of your life, no one else can do it for you.

I'm happy to see your confidence in holding yourself back from relapsing. That confidence suggests you have reached the next level in your reboot journey.

But as always, be aware and alert! Do not let your guard down.
Relapse has never been a big concern of mine. I didn’t really think I had a problem with porn and my spouse knew I’d watch. She’d sometimes watch with me even. She didn’t have a problem with me watching it. My dick just broke and we didn’t know why. After 10 months of drs visits and thinking “well I AM 40”, we realized that it was probably the porn and started our reboot. Although I’ve experienced addiction related brain changes, I’ve not had many urges to go watch. I chalk it up to the fact that we used to have a very good sex life. I remember what that was like and I’m angry as shit that it’s gone.
 

H&M

Member
I don't think he is having too much sex. Honest at 40 you should still be able to have sex at least 3 times a week.


The truth is, there is no set rhythm for having sex 3 times a week. The truth is that people end up having less than this figure, often due to everyday situations.

No one has sex 3 times a week for their entire life as a couple. Nobody the truth.
 

Tryinghere

Active Member
The truth is, there is no set rhythm for having sex 3 times a week. The truth is that people end up having less than this figure, often due to everyday situations.

No one has sex 3 times a week for their entire life as a couple. Nobody the truth.
I don’t think there’s a set amount of times. Nor do I think 3 times in a week is too much for me. Before my shit broke I experienced enough of a sex life to know what my body can handle. The problem, after a lot of hindsight investigation is that I slipped into some old habits….no porn, but Instagram sluts mixed with some old negative emotions mixed with flatline = broken dick round 2.

since then I went in hard mode and after a month or so I was operable again. I AM a little nervous as I MO’d twice this week. There was no porn. And no old negative emotions. Wife is quarantined from covid and I found myself Unable to be with her. Still. I feel that MO’ing as a mistake. At least the twice in two days part.
 
I don’t think there’s a set amount of times. Nor do I think 3 times in a week is too much for me. Before my shit broke I experienced enough of a sex life to know what my body can handle. The problem, after a lot of hindsight investigation is that I slipped into some old habits….no porn, but Instagram sluts mixed with some old negative emotions mixed with flatline = broken dick round 2.

since then I went in hard mode and after a month or so I was operable again. I AM a little nervous as I MO’d twice this week. There was no porn. And no old negative emotions. Wife is quarantined from covid and I found myself Unable to be with her. Still. I feel that MO’ing as a mistake. At least the twice in two days part.
Completely abstaining from PMO, and not just the P, helps to have a faster, stronger and more long-lasting recovery. At least I have noticed personally, over my multiple cycles, that whenever I abstain from even touching myself, my morning wood returns in just a few days.
 

Tryinghere

Active Member
We're going to go ahead and say that I started this journey on Sept 20. That puts me at 122 days. I agree @rebootingyogi that abstaining from MO is beneficial for faster healing. I've found great results as far as sexual performance goes when abstaining from orgasm for a period. I happened to backslide a bit last week. I AM, however happy that pornography wasn't involved. I never intended to go on "hard mode" or gain super powers given by semen retention.....I simply want my dick to work with my wife again. I'm hopeful that my MO last week doesn't undo the progress we've made.

Although I have been able to get an erection with her the past two times we've been together, the quality of my love-making has suffered greatly from what it was before. Everything seems to be "working just fine" but I have far less control over myself than I used to. I used to be able to control when I orgasmed. I could go.....basically indefinitely before I was finished. She would cum 2 or more times during sex regularly. Currently I don't have the stamina to get her off, but I am happy to have had sex with her twice last week without the use of medication.

Keeping on keeping on fellas.
 

Tryinghere

Active Member
Day 120someting:
It's been 7 days since I've been in the same room as my wife. Catching covid would have been helpful during the beginning of our reboot, but right now we've been exploring each other and making love again. Talk about timing. Anyways, we have 3 kids so one of us has to stay healthy at a time so there's someone to do the parent shit. I almost said "fuck it" and went to bed last night. Then, I remembered all the times in my past where a decision began with the words "fuck it". It's never ended well lol. So I decided to spend one more night on the couch. We'll see what happens tonight.
 

otanerferguson

Active Member
Although I have been able to get an erection with her the past two times we've been together, the quality of my love-making has suffered greatly from what it was before. Everything seems to be "working just fine" but I have far less control over myself than I used to. I used to be able to control when I orgasmed. I could go.....basically indefinitely before I was finished. She would cum 2 or more times during sex regularly. Currently I don't have the stamina to get her off.
Hey there, I'm glad to read that, Covid aside (I hope she gets well soon), things are looking up.

With this quotation here, I wanted to say that I experienced the same. And two things with that:

  1. Nowadays I think that what I used to call sexual prowess, was just early stages of delayed ejaculation (you know, going on forever but still being able to cum "on command"). I think desensitization progression in the porn journey goes: premature ejaculation, normal, delayed ejaculation, PIED.
  2. Now that I invariably cum from enjoyment in the middle of sex, and don't even want to hold it in, she actually loves it, even if she doesn't reach an orgasm herself. It makes her feel beautiful, wanted, lusted over. For her, it definitely beats having sex with a viagratized robot whose mind is clearly somewhere else. And don't worry, it doesn't stay that way for long, you eventually find your rhythm and both get their share of joy.
Anyway, hope she gets better and you guys continue improving!
 

Tryinghere

Active Member
Hey there, I'm glad to read that, Covid aside (I hope she gets well soon), things are looking up.

With this quotation here, I wanted to say that I experienced the same. And two things with that:

  1. Nowadays I think that what I used to call sexual prowess, was just early stages of delayed ejaculation (you know, going on forever but still being able to cum "on command"). I think desensitization progression in the porn journey goes: premature ejaculation, normal, delayed ejaculation, PIED.
  2. Now that I invariably cum from enjoyment in the middle of sex, and don't even want to hold it in, she actually loves it, even if she doesn't reach an orgasm herself. It makes her feel beautiful, wanted, lusted over. For her, it definitely beats having sex with a viagratized robot whose mind is clearly somewhere else. And don't worry, it doesn't stay that way for long, you eventually find your rhythm and both get their share of joy.
Anyway, hope she gets better and you guys continue improving!
Thank you! I'm glad to hear it gets better. So far, my wife has been patient as a saint (she hasn't gotten off on my dick for about a year now). I don't expect to be the same "stallion" as I was in my twenties. But I do need some improvement as time goes on. At least enough that I can consistently get her off without using other parts of my body to accomplish the task.

I like your timeline of events sounds pretty accurate. I never had a problem with DE. Went from "cum on command" to PIED....or so it seems. Anyways, there is clear and obvious progress being made and I'm sticking with it. I'm using Sept 20 as my official start date of my reboot (it's somewhere around there) so that puts me at right around 4 months. A few steps forward and a couple back seems to be the progress.....over time, that adds up to a solution. I can't put into words how helpful this forum has been....and will continue to be for me.
 
Here we are. Early morning. With my iPad. On the couch. Pissed off. The only thing missing is the porn. It’s been 4 months. Not going to start over now. last night as stupid, but I didn’t do anything. The streak is alive
Just come across your journal mate. I'm glad the streak is alive, it's amazing to hear about how far you've come. Don't throw it away!
 
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