Up and down ED

Tryinghere

Active Member
There’s no way I give up. Giving up pornography is nothing. As long as I’m able to have sex with my wife again without worry at some point, this whole thing will have seemed easy.
 

Tryinghere

Active Member
Bro,

I went trough similar stuff...But I think withen 90 days you're at the first start. Really.
At the beginer of my reboot ( 3 year ago or more) It seemed works pretty good, even at the first 2 or 3 months, i was able to performe with ed pills, what i couldn't a few months before.
But then i start to relapse with MO and eventually with porn, and the things went down again.
To be honest i spent the last 3 years strugling with PMO ( more M0 then P) and taking ED Pills to support me in order to having sex, even when i noticed a good improvent, being able to mantain an erection to MO, without pills.
So in the last four month a decided to take it serious on hard mode ( or so) and I'm in the best "shape" since then....In the last 3 months a had sex with my GF 15 times with no pills at all, my erections are really good, even better then when i used to take pills.
Another point i'd like to share, withen theses 3 months a had MO 4 or 5 times, and aways noticed a slightly setbacks in the next days. So i'm tryng at all cost avoid any kind of interactions between my hand e my dick...kkkk

Don't worry bro, the UPs and Downs are literally part of the process that take time, unfortunatelly. My expieriece suggests the best way to going on is avoid MO cause even without pornt it links your brain to old habbits and prevent you to heal faster. I'had been trapped at this ilusion thats it's ok to MO with no porn, for me it is not.
Well, after some hindsight and review. I think I may have had a relapse around the time I originally posted to which you replied. I didn’t realize it at the time, but I was habitually scrolling Instagram reels hoping to see something for that dopamine hit. It was just after that that we tried for sex and failed. Prior to that, we had successful sex for 5 days in a row. That was right around the 45 day mark.
I deleted Instagram. I’m thinking those dumb bitches shaking their asses and tits fucked up my recovery. It’s been almost a month since I’ve came. I’m a little afraid to try again. But I have these moments of extreme confidence in my ability to get it up. I can feel it coming alive again. I’m just afraid to pull the trigger and touch a vagina with my dick lol. Last time I lose my erection at the point of penetration.
 

otanerferguson

Active Member
Haven’t attempted any sexual contact since our last failure a little more then a week ago. I get morning wood sometimes. It’s been a little over two weeks since my last O. Absolutely zero masturbation in weeks. No porn in 3 months. I’ve vowed to not cum again until it’s with my wife.
Right now my overwhelming emotion is frustration. Im angry. Aside from raging erections in the morning (a few times a week) and the occasional “movement” when I touch her, my dick is dead and rubbery. This is a stupid problem to have. I want to return to normal. I want to be able to be spontaneous. I want to be good at sex again. Our kids are older. We don’t have to worry about them as much. It’s time for husband and wife to reconnect. Im so fucking over this.

This is the right mindset. You and your wife are going to be just fine. Congrats!
 

Tryinghere

Active Member
oh man. This is the absolutely longest I’ve ever went without having an orgasm. Last orgasm was about a month ago. We’ve had two failed attempts at sex since then. When that didn’t work decided to go hard mode. No MW when I woke up this morning, but as soon as I touch her it was over. Raging erection. She’s not only on her period right now, but she also has to work. Even if that wasn’t the case, we’ve had enough failed attempts that I’m more then a little gunshy. I’m horny as hell right now. I masturbated just a little bit. I didn’t finish and no screens were involved.

Point is, I’m getting to a point here where I feel like I’m ready to explode. There’s no way I’m cumming without it being with her. Being married with 3 kids, plus dealing with PIED makes it real difficult to be spontaneous. I guess what I’m saying is I’m buckling up for a bumpy ride over the next few days. I’ve got my cold shower at the ready and plenty of chores to keep me busy. I need to cum. Or at least I feel like I need to. It’s hard to tell if I’m really horny or was just turned on by her this morning then triggered by a troll on here

Some Ass hat on here shared a link to an escort website. That almost ended badly for me. I’ve found some people come in here just to troll. Thankfully, using pornography has zero pull on me, although I was tempted. “Just get off and move along with your day” crept into my head a little bit. There are dudes in here that are going to log on for some support and end up getting fucked up by shit like that. Assholes.

anyways. That’s my entry for the day. Godspeed my friends. I wish you all the success
 

Tryinghere

Active Member
A couple of days away from 100 days. I feel like I'm ready for some rewiring. Haven't been too close to my wife recently. We had a minor argument, and piggy backed that right into Christmas running. She's currently on her cycle, but literally every time she finishes she gets horny. I'm nervous. I like having no pressure right now, but she'll want some in a week. That said, I do want to have successful sex. Trying to find the time to sit down and speak with her about the next phase of our recovery.
 

Tryinghere

Active Member
I invited my wife to dinner on Thursday. By “invite” I mean I asked my middle son for if he could watch our youngest son for a few hours and then added “dinner with spouse” on our shared calendar. Her response was that the children will have been home alone all day by that point. This is not a knock on her. She’s right. I’m frustrated because I want to connect w her and have a couple drinks. Talk about some rewiring. We need to set expectations (or lack there of) as we rewire. Im not sure how long it’ll be before I have reliable erections again so…..pied is stupid. Fuck you pied.
 

LionHeart

Member
I invited my wife to dinner on Thursday. By “invite” I mean I asked my middle son for if he could watch our youngest son for a few hours and then added “dinner with spouse” on our shared calendar. Her response was that the children will have been home alone all day by that point. This is not a knock on her. She’s right. I’m frustrated because I want to connect w her and have a couple drinks. Talk about some rewiring. We need to set expectations (or lack there of) as we rewire. Im not sure how long it’ll be before I have reliable erections again so…..pied is stupid. Fuck you pied.
Pied is fucking shit. Only good thing in pied is that it can be cured. I started to have erection problems with my lady. Started rebooting 12.12.21 and since then i have not fapped or watched porn. I've been rewiring with my lady. Cuddling, kissing, having sex, you name it. And i find it HIGHLY, ULTIMATELY GOD-TIER beneficial. You should definetly aim for rewiring with your wife! Push harder! My pied was basicly cured within two weeks. Just this morning i came home from work and just seeing my lady gave me instant super-boner and there was no way to make it calm down. We just had to bang in shower. After sex it still was erect and ready to go, which has NEVER HAPPENED before. Stubborn son of a bitch it was.

So, i strongly suggest you do everything you can so that you can start rewiring with your woman. I did it also on those days when i was not interrested at all! Libido and desire for sex were not there.. but i still kissed, hugged and had sex with her even when my dick was not 100% hard. It paid off big time. I don't know what would have happened if i just didn't do any rewiring.. ? This strategy seems to work like charm, so i'm continuing like this, till the end of times.
 

Tryinghere

Active Member
Pied is stupid. I’m almost 100 days since I started reboot. We had successful sex about 6 times or so but I went into flatline and my dick stopped working again. Two failed attempts and we haven’t tried again. It’s been about 20 days since we last tried anything sexual at all. It’s like the last failed attempt kind of put a wedge between us. Two businesses, 3 kids and Christmas has also put a strain on our schedule. We haven’t had a chance to say hello to each other let alone rewire. Idk. I’m frustrated dude.
 

Tryinghere

Active Member
Pied is fucking shit. Only good thing in pied is that it can be cured. I started to have erection problems with my lady. Started rebooting 12.12.21 and since then i have not fapped or watched porn. I've been rewiring with my lady. Cuddling, kissing, having sex, you name it. And i find it HIGHLY, ULTIMATELY GOD-TIER beneficial. You should definetly aim for rewiring with your wife! Push harder! My pied was basicly cured within two weeks. Just this morning i came home from work and just seeing my lady gave me instant super-boner and there was no way to make it calm down. We just had to bang in shower. After sex it still was erect and ready to go, which has NEVER HAPPENED before. Stubborn son of a bitch it was.

So, i strongly suggest you do everything you can so that you can start rewiring with your woman. I did it also on those days when i was not interrested at all! Libido and desire for sex were not there.. but i still kissed, hugged and had sex with her even when my dick was not 100% hard. It paid off big time. I don't know what would have happened if i just didn't do any rewiring.. ? This strategy seems to work like charm, so i'm continuing like this, till the end of times.
I appreciate it. We started having erection issues sometime after covid but the groundwork was being laid long before that. I started nofap on sept 20. I’ve only been on hard mode though for the past month or so. I’m glad you made it through! We were doing great and having sex after 30/45 days then everything went to shit
 

Tryinghere

Active Member
Pied is fucking shit. Only good thing in pied is that it can be cured. I started to have erection problems with my lady. Started rebooting 12.12.21 and since then i have not fapped or watched porn. I've been rewiring with my lady. Cuddling, kissing, having sex, you name it. And i find it HIGHLY, ULTIMATELY GOD-TIER beneficial. You should definetly aim for rewiring with your wife! Push harder! My pied was basicly cured within two weeks. Just this morning i came home from work and just seeing my lady gave me instant super-boner and there was no way to make it calm down. We just had to bang in shower. After sex it still was erect and ready to go, which has NEVER HAPPENED before. Stubborn son of a bitch it was.

So, i strongly suggest you do everything you can so that you can start rewiring with your woman. I did it also on those days when i was not interrested at all! Libido and desire for sex were not there.. but i still kissed, hugged and had sex with her even when my dick was not 100% hard. It paid off big time. I don't know what would have happened if i just didn't do any rewiring.. ? This strategy seems to work like charm, so i'm continuing like this, till the end of times.
If I may ask. Did you guys have any strategies or anything you used? I mean. My wife and I are both aware of what’s happened. We both are on the same page and she’s being supportive. We aren’t even above scheduling “sex” nights or anything like that. I’m having a difficult time getting out of my own way. I’m so far inside my own head after a year of having a broken dick and not knowing why (just decided to give up jerking off and porn in September but its been an issue for about a year). We’ve just failed and had so much disappointment in our sex life. We’re both afraid to keep going. It’s scary too because it feels like We’re at the edge of a breakthrough. Just can’t get over the hump.
 

LionHeart

Member
If I may ask. Did you guys have any strategies or anything you used? I mean. My wife and I are both aware of what’s happened. We both are on the same page and she’s being supportive. We aren’t even above scheduling “sex” nights or anything like that. I’m having a difficult time getting out of my own way. I’m so far inside my own head after a year of having a broken dick and not knowing why (just decided to give up jerking off and porn in September but its been an issue for about a year). We’ve just failed and had so much disappointment in our sex life. We’re both afraid to keep going. It’s scary too because it feels like We’re at the edge of a breakthrough. Just can’t get over the hump.
We don't have any plans. She doesn't know about my reboot. My PIED was not that severe. I had few weeks of ED back in the summer but i also managed to hurt my lower back at the gym doing raw deadlifts, so that's where i lied to her that i can't get erection because i have serious back pain that projects also into my pelvis and legs. I cured myself in few weeks and got my erection back but then i just continued with porn and shit. Got all my problems back again. That is one the reasons i started to seek answers to my situation and i was lucky enough to run across to term PIED. Before that I though my problems were penis enlargement exercises related so i stopped doing PE but continued with porn. Did not help me at all.

She does know that i'm doing things to change the course of our lives for better. Like everyone in long relationship with kids, things tend to regress. I mean sexlife, passion, doing things together, going out and laugh together etc. Love slowly starts to fade away as you entwine with the harsh reality of just managing to raise your kids and be servant for them in every situation.. You know, all the things you do with a woman when you start dating her just ends at some point and all your focus goes to everything else.

... but she doesn't know that my "life change" is all about stopping PMO. She thinks i'm just trying to see things and life more positive way. Which is true ofcourse, but i'm not going to tell her that it is due to reboot. She knows and feels for sure that i'm way more into her these days. Well ofcourse i am, because i'm horny as hell and when i can't watch porn and fap, we have to do it old fashioned style 🤣

Your situation sounds more severe. I wonder why? 🤔 what makes you so different compared to me? I've watched all my life all kinds of animal related fetish shit and really messed up my brains and way of thinking what is normal and what isn'y .. but it looks like that i still managed cure myself just within couple of weeks by doing nofap... 😲🤷‍♂️

Are you sure that your t-levels are normal? Are you living healthy life? Do you exercise? Lifting weights at the gym is the best activity man can do with pants on 🤣 also pants off, easily. I got to try it some day.
 

Tryinghere

Active Member
We don't have any plans. She doesn't know about my reboot. My PIED was not that severe. I had few weeks of ED back in the summer but i also managed to hurt my lower back at the gym doing raw deadlifts, so that's where i lied to her that i can't get erection because i have serious back pain that projects also into my pelvis and legs. I cured myself in few weeks and got my erection back but then i just continued with porn and shit. Got all my problems back again. That is one the reasons i started to seek answers to my situation and i was lucky enough to run across to term PIED. Before that I though my problems were penis enlargement exercises related so i stopped doing PE but continued with porn. Did not help me at all.

She does know that i'm doing things to change the course of our lives for better. Like everyone in long relationship with kids, things tend to regress. I mean sexlife, passion, doing things together, going out and laugh together etc. Love slowly starts to fade away as you entwine with the harsh reality of just managing to raise your kids and be servant for them in every situation.. You know, all the things you do with a woman when you start dating her just ends at some point and all your focus goes to everything else.

... but she doesn't know that my "life change" is all about stopping PMO. She thinks i'm just trying to see things and life more positive way. Which is true ofcourse, but i'm not going to tell her that it is due to reboot. She knows and feels for sure that i'm way more into her these days. Well ofcourse i am, because i'm horny as hell and when i can't watch porn and fap, we have to do it old fashioned style 🤣

Your situation sounds more severe. I wonder why? 🤔 what makes you so different compared to me? I've watched all my life all kinds of animal related fetish shit and really messed up my brains and way of thinking what is normal and what isn'y .. but it looks like that i still managed cure myself just within couple of weeks by doing nofap... 😲🤷‍♂️

Are you sure that your t-levels are normal? Are you living healthy life? Do you exercise? Lifting weights at the gym is the best activity man can do with pants on 🤣 also pants off, easily. I got to try it some day.
Thanks for the reply. Yeah, I've had my T levels checked. All is well. I'm fairly certain I know the issue. She was on some medication for a few years that killed her libido.....we didn't know that at the time. As time progressed, I guess I just began deconditioning myself to her and started on the porn just to take care of myself and stop sex from being an issue. She knew I would PMO. She had no problem with it. Just like her medication, we had no idea it would affect our sex life. She would sometimes join me in watching. She got off the medication and her libido is back in full force. (dude, the shit we used to do....). The problem is that by the time we realized what was going on, the PIED was here and although She's forgiven me for my role....and I've forgiven her in the role she played. My brain has, I think, disconnected sex from her and it's causing a longer recovery time. I know for sure we can fix it with some proper rewiring. We have a strong relationship in every way. Our sex life USED to be insanely great. And aside from our current sexual situation, we're completely compatible. We were stuck in a shitty situation for a few years and now we just need to get back to it. The frustration involved with trying to be intimate though is palpable. Both because of the past year's worth of failures and our current schedules.
 

Tryinghere

Active Member
Day 101. I edged a bit yesterday. No screens involved. Need to do some rewiring. I can feel that my body is becoming ready. I feel little spurts of libido. Then it’ll go back to nothing. My wife has seemed distant recently. Not too much physical touch. We’re not fighting or anything. We’re all just a little under the weather and Christmas time was batshit crazy. Regardless, there’s been space between us. I expect that to iron itself out in the next few days or so.
 

otanerferguson

Active Member
I appreciate it. We started having erection issues sometime after covid but the groundwork was being laid long before that. I started nofap on sept 20. I’ve only been on hard mode though for the past month or so. I’m glad you made it through! We were doing great and having sex after 30/45 days then everything went to shit
I would suggest you try not having orgasms yourself for a while. If you do have sex with your wife, let her have orgasms, but tell her that you need to go for a few sessions without you having any. In our case, that helped. We decided on 10 successful sessions, which for a 40 year old that means a long time. There is a lot of semen leakage and need to just jack off during that time, but just soldier on. It's worth the wait.
 

Tryinghere

Active Member
I would suggest you try not having orgasms yourself for a while. If you do have sex with your wife, let her have orgasms, but tell her that you need to go for a few sessions without you having any. In our case, that helped. We decided on 10 successful sessions, which for a 40 year old that means a long time. There is a lot of semen leakage and need to just jack off during that time, but just soldier on. It's worth the wait.
Yeah, I'm ready. I've been coming across that same advice a few times. Will give that a try. I'm a little afraid to pull the trigger and try anything though. We'll see what happens. Today is my birthday. Year's past would be spent in anxious anticipation for what she had planned for me. This year it's not quite like that, but I plan on trying to just be relaxed and have a nice time with my family. When the children are away and it's just her and I we'll see what happens.

Good luck to you and thanks for the advice. I think I want to try it. I've already went to hard mode. It's been weeks since I've had an orgasm. My last one was with her actually.....then two failed attempts at sex and then a long flatline. I'm kind of past the point of even wanting to have an orgasm although I can't say I'll be able to hold it in should I end up with her. I definitely plan on trying.
 

Tryinghere

Active Member
Hey fellas,
It's time for another entry in the ole' journal. We're on day whatever it is (low 100's). Today is my 41st birthday. 366 days ago I did not realize that PIED was a problem. I only knew that I was attempting to kill my libido purposely. I did not know it was possible. I'll avoid the reasons why I made such a terrible choice for now. Fact is. I killed it and I killed my dick. And now, it's a massive regret and I want nothing more than to be able to have sex with my wife. Birthday's past I would wake up in the morning filled with anticipation on what kind of freaky dirty shit my lady had planned for me....I would be excited about it. This year is a bit different to say the least. Today for my birthday I've been having a discussion on rewiring with my partner, with my partner. She's not too big of a fan on me avoiding climax during our sexual encounters......but at the moment, we can't have sexual encounters because I can't get it up so.....

Anyways, I'm looking for some website or video, or tip to show her and look at with her to help with the rewiring discussion. Help guys! You've been here for me before. I'm asking y'all to be there for me again. JUST REWIRING TIPS and ideas to speed things up and things we can do during flatline. I'm good on the reboot......I NEED TO REWIRE
 

BigM

Member
Yeah, I'm ready. I've been coming across that same advice a few times. Will give that a try. I'm a little afraid to pull the trigger and try anything though. We'll see what happens. Today is my birthday. Year's past would be spent in anxious anticipation for what she had planned for me. This year it's not quite like that, but I plan on trying to just be relaxed and have a nice time with my family. When the children are away and it's just her and I we'll see what happens.

Good luck to you and thanks for the advice. I think I want to try it. I've already went to hard mode. It's been weeks since I've had an orgasm. My last one was with her actually.....then two failed attempts at sex and then a long flatline. I'm kind of past the point of even wanting to have an orgasm although I can't say I'll be able to hold it in should I end up with her. I definitely plan on trying.
Happy birthday man. Don't panic everything
 
D

Deleted member 26201

Guest
Thanks for the reply. Yeah, I've had my T levels checked. All is well. I'm fairly certain I know the issue. She was on some medication for a few years that killed her libido.....we didn't know that at the time. As time progressed, I guess I just began deconditioning myself to her and started on the porn just to take care of myself and stop sex from being an issue. She knew I would PMO. She had no problem with it. Just like her medication, we had no idea it would affect our sex life. She would sometimes join me in watching. She got off the medication and her libido is back in full force. (dude, the shit we used to do....). The problem is that by the time we realized what was going on, the PIED was here and although She's forgiven me for my role....and I've forgiven her in the role she played. My brain has, I think, disconnected sex from her and it's causing a longer recovery time. I know for sure we can fix it with some proper rewiring. We have a strong relationship in every way. Our sex life USED to be insanely great. And aside from our current sexual situation, we're completely compatible. We were stuck in a shitty situation for a few years and now we just need to get back to it. The frustration involved with trying to be intimate though is palpable. Both because of the past year's worth of failures and our current schedules.
this is to the ‘long term’ rebooters here who have seen little to no progress in years. i stumbled across a thread from a user who had been rebooting for 3 years and had seen no improvement. he stated in an early post that his doctor had taken his testosterone test and he fell in within the ‘normal range’, with a reading of 11.5 nmol/l. the range of normal testosterone (for nmol/L is 11-30) characterises ‘normal’ for guys aged between their teens and men aged 80+. this dude had the testosterone of a pensioner and was wondering why he had sexual problems for years. it is a joke that his gp didn’t clear up that this wasn’t the normal reading for his age (early 20s).i messaged him already but it’s been years since he posted so i hope he’s still alive or worked out his issue. this problem is easily amended through use of testosterone replacement therapy (TRT). the fact that this possibly lead to this guy taking his life (or at best suffering miserably for 1/3 of a decade) is sickening. there are different testosterone systems besides nmol/L but readings are easily converted on google. this is so important to be aware of. nofap and pornfree are brilliant (and should be practiced either way) however this does not mean they are the solution to your sexual problems. in many cases they will be. if you’re trying to paint the mona lisa at least make sure you’re using a paintbrush.
 

otanerferguson

Active Member
JUST REWIRING TIPS and ideas to speed things up and things we can do during flatline. I'm good on the reboot......I NEED TO REWIRE

For the rewiring part, I joined a yoga class (NOT ONLINE) and got to spend time in the presence of beautiful women, bent over in tights. It's a safe environment where it is kind of okay to stare. I also had a Nuru massage at some point and asked the lady not to give me a happy ending. That's the one where a beautiful woman rubs her body against yours. By that point I was deep into the flatline and it took a good 20 minutes to get an erection from that, but once I got it, it was rock hard and ready to go. I didn't use it. It was just an exercise in rewiring, but at that point in my life I hadn't had an erection that hard in many years without pills. I did not go back. One has to be aware that those are essentially forms of prostitution and you could end up replacing one addiction with a more expensive and risky one.

And with my wife we had a number of sessions where we would agree that she would not expect an erection from me, but she would only rub her clit against my penis in a straddling position. More often than not I got the erection, but did not stick it in. She would orgasm like that. We did that for about two months.
 

Tryinghere

Active Member
For the rewiring part, I joined a yoga class (NOT ONLINE) and got to spend time in the presence of beautiful women, bent over in tights. It's a safe environment where it is kind of okay to stare. I also had a Nuru massage at some point and asked the lady not to give me a happy ending. That's the one where a beautiful woman rubs her body against yours. By that point I was deep into the flatline and it took a good 20 minutes to get an erection from that, but once I got it, it was rock hard and ready to go. I didn't use it. It was just an exercise in rewiring, but at that point in my life I hadn't had an erection that hard in many years without pills. I did not go back. One has to be aware that those are essentially forms of prostitution and you could end up replacing one addiction with a more expensive and risky one.

And with my wife we had a number of sessions where we would agree that she would not expect an erection from me, but she would only rub her clit against my penis in a straddling position. More often than not I got the erection, but did not stick it in. She would orgasm like that. We did that for about two months.
Thanks so much for the advice. I really like the idea of trying what you and your wife did. As luck would have it, my wife is a yoga teacher. I try going to a class once a week but it doesn't always work like that. Even so I can, and do try to watch her move often. Thanks man. I appreciate it. So many people talk about cuddling and kissing and making out....work out....blah blah blah. And that's all fine and good advice. But rarely do you get any solid advice for what to do in the moment with your spouse after months of disappointment.
 
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